I think we all need to take a seat, maybe form a circle and just relax for a few minutes. We get a little bit too crazy about sports sometimes, and we tend to overreact toward athletes and media analysts for their decisions and/or opinions. I mean, take Twitter, for example. Have you seen the horrible verbal venom that is spewed at famous people on that “social media” site on a daily basis? Hell, I’m as guilty as the next guy for making cracks at some athletes, but I’m talking about the violent threats.

It’s really getting out of hand, and it’s been spilling out into our stadiums and arenas now, ruining the idea of fun competition for everyone. What the hell’s the point of going to a game or a bar these days if you constantly have to look over your shoulder and wonder if someone is about to stab you? Sports are supposed to take our minds off the really sh*tty things in life and provide hope and inspiration. Instead, we have people slaughtering each other in the streets.

Everybody calm down and let’s remember why we’re here in the first place… to hope that the other team loses and pray for people to be fired. That’s what sports are all about, dang it.

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A few days ago we shared a clip from the toddler Kumite and people seemed to like it, so now every time children get stuck in brutally violent adult situations I’m going to try to share it — for example, by way of Best Week Ever comes this clip of a bunch of Kazakhstani 9-year olds turning a post-game hockey handslapping into a full-bore gang war.

It’s hard to pick a favorite part of any Kids Beating The Hell Out Of Each Other video, but I think the kid in the upper left corner at the :30 mark being carried away kicking and screaming like he’s Veruca Salt is the best. The worst part is Kokshetau-Burabay’s green #10 skating up and punching a kid in the back of the head while he’s in the mount. You’ve got to try pretty hard to be the least sportsmanlike person in a bench-clearing brawl.

[h/t Robopanda]

I think the video works best completely out of context. What you’re witnessing is a game of (according to YouTube) “[Boutaoshi] doing,” a game involving pulling a pole down. It takes the concepts of rugby, “Red Rover” and “King of the Hill” and sort of shoves it all together until the field looks like an ultimate mash-up of post-World Series celebration and Mutant League Football. And I think one of the teams is wearing panda helmets. Are those teams? I think there are like six teams.

Translation of the video’s title: “Defensive large stick pushing down intense fighting!” I think that explains a lot more about the game than Boutaoshi Doing. We should start naming other sports like that. Call basketball “Team-based sphere lobbing pretending to fall down when nobody touched you super contest.” Try it for yourself. The best Boutaoshi Doing-style name posted in our comments section wins a prize.

(Note: The prize is me bumrushing you in a panda helmet and hitting you with a telephone pole.)

[via Buzzfeed]

It’s official: Mexico is officially too violent for women’s golf. The LPGA Tour recently postponed the Tres Marias Championship, based in Morelia, Mexico, due to what is being called drug violence in the area. I never would have expected this to happen to a sport that wasn’t subsidized by the NBA.

While the tournament contract goes through ’12, an LPGA official said they would need to see significant improvement before returning.

The event was slated for April 21-24. There’s now a three-week gap in April between the Kraft Nabisco and the Avnet LPGA Classic in Mobile, Ala.

–GolfWeek, via Twackle.

That’s sound policy for a nation that has murdered three of its mayors in the last month.

The LPGA has struggled over the last few years to maintain eyeballs and sponsorships, and that league has been hurt by the retirements of stars Annika Sorrenstam and Lorena Ochoa. Their No. 1-ranked player is Korean, and the ladies even have one tour stop without prize money. So basically nobody’s getting paid and nobody is recognizable? Sounds like a perfect fit with Mexico to me.

Did you know that inter inner-city gang members wear MLB caps to signify their allegiance to a certain group?  Sociologists refer to these affilations expressed through wardrobe choice as "colors".

“It has been brought to our attention that some combinations of icons and colors on a select number of our caps could be too closely perceived to be in association with gangs,” said Christopher H. Koch, CEO of New Era Cap. “In response, we, along with Major League Baseball, have pulled those caps.”

Wow, I had no idea.  Or else I forget it like 15 years ago when everybody else in the country noticed it.  It's good to know that the ignorance of steroid abuse wasn't an isolated incident – MLB is just a couple of decades behind on everything.

The team was “completely unaware that caps with gang-related logos and colors had been manufactured with the New York Yankees logo on them,” said a Yankees statement . . . Richard Garcia, a karate instructor who works with Peace on the Street to provide youngsters with alternatives to gangs, said . . . “My fear was that the wrong kid was going to wear the wrong hat in the wrong neighborhood and get hurt." 

Yeah, like when you're a drunken mick wearing a White Sox hat who an unscrupulous cab driver has dropped off on 63rd Street on the South Side of Chicago.  You want to avoid that situation, unless you particularly enjoy having cigars being put out on your forearms. -KD