During the week, I hardly remember that I have a TV. I'll sit on my couch, look at my TV, and be like, "I'm bored; what can I do?" Then I'll look at my TV for another 10 seconds or so, shrug my shoulders, and go into my room to crank out another 300 push-ups and 500 sit-ups. So I'm not one of those TV people.

However, thanks to the World Series sucking balls so hard, I flipped through the channels during baseball one night and found Friday Night Lights. Now, I understand that people who tell you that you just have to watch a show are assholes who are just forcing their interests on you, but… you have to watch this show. I know it's confusing, because it's called Friday Night Lights and it's usually on Tuesdays, only tonight it's on Monday, up against Sunday Night Football which is also now on Mondays, but take some time out tonight to watch this show. It's on at 10 p.m. on NBC. Oh, and all times are Eastern, because the Midwest is dead to me.

Then, at 11 o'clock, skip the local news (today's headline: somebody got shot) and watch the Daily Show, where King James, Monsieur LeBron Himself, will be the guest during Jon Stewart's week of recording the show from Ohio. I guess Carl Monday wasn't available.

Finally, if you get really bored and "Two and a Half Men" just isn't bringing the laughs like it usually does, check out Monday Night Football, Pats at Vikings. You can marvel at John Madden's plasticky blubber Tony Kornheiser's lazy combover in HD, and — if we're lucky — Tom Brady will cuddle a goat.

Sports fans will get something rare for a Tuesday night: a decision about what to watch.

Of course, you may have heard about the ALCS opener tonight on FOX. The A's are coming off their first playoff series victory since the Bash Brothers played, and the Tigers defeated the Most Potent Offense of All Time in four games. And you know why? Because Jim Leyland carefully orchestrated the Tigers' losses for two months in order to face the Yankees in a five-game series instead of seven, that's why. Goddam he's smart. And tough. Tougher than getting laid in Utah on a Sunday.

But there's a new show out there, too: "Friday Night Lights." The New York Times review shot its load all over the show (link requires registration), and it's a good way to get a glimpse of Texas without actually having to go there.

For those keeping track: "Friday Night Lights" is on Tuesday, Monday Night Football is now on Sunday, and Sunday Night Football is on Monday, except when Sunday Night Football (previously on Mondays) is on on Sunday. Got it? Just remember that Wednesdays suck and you'll be good.

Oh, and I guess there might be hockey on, too. I forgot to check. "Oops."