
When I heard that Bill Romanowski was coaching his 12-year-old son's flag football team, I was ecstatic. Romo used steroids (allegedly!), spit in an opponent's face, and broke a teammate's eye socket during a locker room fight over the course of his 16-year career. He was the Karl Rove of the NFL. Surely this would end in some kind of insanely blow-up in which he killed a child. Right?
Ummm… no. In a recent game that turned to physical — according to the San Francisco Chronicle – Romo talked sternly but sensibly to the opposing coach at halftime, then scolded one of the opposing players after an illegal leg-whip in the second half. He apparently even told his team that they were strictly forbidden from retaliating to the dirty play.
What the hell is going on? Can't I get one decent scandal? I don't need him to molest the kids, but can't he at least give the kids steroids? Or encourage them to cheer for Barry Bonds? Or tell them that unprotected sex in San Francisco is a good decision? This is like when I read A Clockwork Orange and at the end the head droog has grown up and lives a normal, boring life. Just one more reason not to read books: they're more realistic than movies and they never have explosions. Okay that's two reasons but whatever.