People who talk about Ricky the Dragging Steamboat or Dick Flair or the Underbaker with any kind of fondness are just nostalgic for a time when they were idiots. Pro wrestling is fucking stupid, okay? Always has been. It's a goddam soap opera for pubescent boys, and everyone knows pubescent boys are considerably less intelligent than dolphins and chimpanzees.
So I guess it makes sense that Hulk Hogan would endorse fantasy fishing. I can only imagine the intellectual heavyweights that appeals to.
Man I just love how exciting February is for sports. Up next on ESPN2: 11 hours of fishing. Hell yes!
Every minute of the excitement of the 38th Bassmaster Classic, from multiple Classic venues, will be presented by ESPN2, ESPN Radio and www.Bassmaster.com. ESPN2 will provide 11 hours of programming through the three days of competition, topping off the extensive coverage with two more hours Feb. 28.
Just be careful about going to that Bassmaster website. I initially forgot to type in the "B" and ended up at a very different site. Different, yet also intriguing.
(Note: Apologies for the Russian interjections in the video. If you can find the untainted clip, please send it along.)
Four dudes went to Alaska to fish for sharks in kayaks. I mean, the guys were in kayaks, not the sharks. Well, the sharks eventually got pulled into the kayaks. But whatever. The point is that people in kayaks went shark-fishing.
The daring team of four were surrounded by 200 to 300 salmon sharks which were up to nine feet long and weighed between 400 and 1,000 lbs….
"There were so many sharks thrashing around us it was crazy. Even while fighting these fish, others were crashing the surface only feet away."
Psssh. Salmon sharks? Solar eclipses and puppies growling are scarier than salmon sharks. I went to Disney World when I was 10 and swam with sharks. They were those little bottom-feeder sharks, but it's still a scarier story than what these guys did.
Sharp young drunkard Cory sent in this New York Times article that profiles the growing dangers in Florida, where leaping sturgeon are increasingly injuring boaters in America's Wang.
Florida’s season of “sturgeon strikes” — law enforcement’s term for collisions between the state’s largest freshwater fish and hapless boaters — [is] already well under way. It may seem bizarre, but it is no joke. Leaping sturgeon have injured three people on the Suwannee this year, including a woman on a Jet Ski and a girl whose leg was shattered when one of the giant fish jumped aboard her boat. Eight others were hit last year, and with traffic growing on the storied river, sturgeon are joining alligators and hurricanes on the list of things to dread in Florida.
Other things to dread in Florida: transsexual strippers, the University of Miami football team, elections, Jacksonville, and Gators quarterback Tim Tebow. But if 200-pound sturgeon flying through the air are injuring people, then we're going to need Tebow. Because armored jumping fish means we're only a step or two away on the evolutionary ladder from flying sharks. Flying sharks, man. Tebow might be the only human that can save us.
My favorite part is when the fish hits him in the groin.
Need more fishing videos that aren't particularly new? Who doesn't! Head over to Bounty Fishing.
