What you’re looking at is the best-possible and most serendipitous sports “selfie” you can take.

Meet Tampa Bay Rays reporter Kelly Nash. In addition to being pretty and having a great baseball job, she comes equipped with a magical forcefield that keeps her from getting drilled by fly balls when she’s taking Instagram pics at Fenway Park instead of paying attention. The photo hasn’t been doctored … in fact, representatives from the Rays speaking with Yahoo Sports seemed surprised at the idea that anyone WOULD doctor a photo like that, and I have to agree. I can’t get my phone to take a picture of anything more mobile than a bowl of fruit without it blurring up. This photo was a gift.

If you’re wondering what mystical force kept Kelly from getting brained, here’s a quick conversation from her Twitter this morning explaining why she and actor Tony Danza are so very much alike:

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During last night’s Red Sox/Angels game, Boston fans serenaded slugger Kevin Youkilis with a rendition of the Biz Markie classic “Just A Friend,” marking the coolest thing to happen at Fenway Park since that drunk field-runner got gored by security a few days ago. The joke here, of course, is that Youkilis’ last name begins with “you” and he has what the fans need, and also he is overweight and from the 80s. OH BABY YOUUUUUU.

No word on whether or not the third baseman made the music with his mouth.

This might be the thing baseball needs – live, fan-supplied entrance themes. I know I wouldn’t miss a chance to sing “Crazy Train” for Ryan Church, even if it meant Ryan Church was playing baseball again. Having to remember which Metallica song is for Casey Blake and which one is for Phil Hughes could lead to a sabermetric understanding of music. Just remember: Paul Konerko is a Harvester of Sorrow. Like you had to be reminded.

Getting drunk and running out onto a baseball field is a stupid idea, but it’s especially stupid at Fenway Park, where security is trained to seek and destroy. These guys are like the cougars from Red Dead Redemption, speeding in from out of nowhere to take you out with one pounce.

The following video is a perfect example, captured by a guy who (I guess) paid to get into a baseball game so he could aimlessly film his own legs. He looks up in time to see a guy running onto the field with his arms in the air, and stays on it long enough to see said guy being crushed to his f**king doom by a security professional who may or may not be goddamned Goldberg. Listen closely for running commentary, which includes the sort of insight you’d expect from people who think a field run is funny, like “woooo” and “UHHHHHH” (sp).

C-c-c-combo breaker.