My favorite Warming Glow contributor, Josh Kurp*, sent me an email earlier with a link to a Tumblr post that featured the above picture. What you see, obviously, is a man wearing a Chicago Bulls hat with fake poop on the bill. At least I hope that’s fake poop. If it’s real poop, then we’ve got a whole different ballgame going on.

But based on the assumption that the poop is fake, I am forced to ask – why? For further head-scratching, I will refer to the person who took this strange picture, @cordjefferson.

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Justin Verlander’s Sports Illustrated covergirl and technically-sports-related girlfriend Kate Upton has been pretty light on the photoshoots since bikini season ended, but her latest from CR Fashion Book magazine (entitled “Hush Lil Baby, Don’t You Cry”) has hit the web, and it’s … pretty weird.

The easiest way to describe it is that it’s Kate Upton with baby animals. And babies. And guys in bear costumes. I think she’s supposed to be Mother Nature? It’s like somebody took her Peter Cottontail video and decided to make it SUPER SERIOUS. I don’t even know.

Anyway, you can check out the pictures after the jump. I’ve also included a video from the shoot at the end of the gallery (thanks to the Internet’s closest-working Kate Upton representative, Mr. Jimmy Traina of SI’s Hot Clicks), and if you were hoping it’d establish some kind of narrative … yeah, no.

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I have this theory that Michael Jordan sincerely believes in his head that he is still 32-years old. That would explain why he parties with his sons, who are in college, and recently married his longtime girlfriend and model Yvette Prieto, who is fittingly 32. But it’s also the only thing that can explain why he’s so damn bipolar with his fashion sense.

I don’t want to suggest that Jordan always dresses like he lost a bet – which isn’t completely out of the realm of possibility – because he does have his moments of dapperness. But there is just so much photographic evidence to the contrary that it makes perfect sense that someone created a site devoted to Jordan’s lacking fashion sense.

“What the F*ck is Mike Wearing?” bluntly calls out the NBA’s greatest player of all-time and possibly worst owner of the last 10 years for his terrible style choices, and I’ve included some of their best/worst choices after the jump, as well as some of my own picks.

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Homegirl with the sleeves has no idea how lucky she is.

With Leather’s 2011 Celebrity Fan of the Year and, much less importantly, Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue cover model Kate Upton is down in Mexico City for the Liverpool Fashion Fest, and that seems strange to me, because when I think of Liverpool I imagine England, and when I think of Mexico I think of the exact opposite of fashion. But hey, who am I to argue?

Upton appeared at the Liverpool Interlomas Department Store yesterday, and I don’t know why exactly – other than she’s KATE-F*CKING-UPTON and she can do whatever she wants – so I’m going to assume that she’s on a global tour to show everyone how hot they should be. That’s why she took a moment to pose with these Mexican girls and give all girls hope that one day they too can be perfect.

Spoiler alert: Nope.

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Serena Williams was out and about in West Hollywood the other night, and there’s really nothing else to report. I mean, I sure wish that something awesome happened like she single-handedly kicked the crap out of a group of terrorists who were hellbent on destroying Lindsay Lohan’s cocaine supply. Allegedly. Did I do that right?

Regardless, I was going through my arsenal of random sports photos and I realized a theme that I know other people have talked about, but since I’m a dude I’ve always drowned it out, usually with the Golden Girls theme song. Williams is quite the fashionista when she’s not on the tennis court, and even when she is playing she tends to be a bit more unique and daring. But I thought we’d spend today’s slow news day – screw you, Game 2 – exploring Serena’s status as an American – nay, global! – fashion icon.

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Here’s Lakers superstar Kobe Bryant with a…wait, what the hell is this? This looks like an Isaac Mizrahi production of “Little Bo Peep.” Seriously, I’m lost. Go read the article, but be warned, all I got out of it was Kobe’s diatribe on dog poop.

So, what else can you tell us about yourself?
I love dogs, I hate bees, I love snakes. And I hate dog s–t. I absolutely hate dog s–t.

So what do you do when dogs poop in front of the house?
Clean it up. [Laughs.]

That helps keeps you grounded, I’m sure, but most would think you’d have someone whose job is to pick up your dog poop.
I do, but they have to have off days. And the dog doesn’t say, “Oh, it’s my walker’s day off, so I’m not gonna s–t today! When they gotta go, they gotta go. And somebody’s gotta pick it up. –LA Times Mag, via BDL.

There are more pics at that link as well. And then come back and explain it to me. I know nothing about fashion. Is this too literal? Is this art deco? I don’t know anything about Art Deco. I used to live next to an Art Decker, but he was a grumpy sumbitch. Probably because we peed on his lawn a lot.