People have been discussing what’s missing from men’s tennis for some time. Some say the speed of the game has taken away the game’s nuances, while others blame the absence of a consistent American challenger. But yesterday during the Australian Open, we realized that all the sport needed was MORE BIRD ATTACKS!

In today’s semifinal, the birds began to — as Chris Fowler called it on ESPN — “dive-bomb the court.”

Yesterday, McEnroe blamed it on the darn Indian Myras, but today, it was certainly the seagulls.

–Press Coverage.

Seagulls aren’t really that dangerous. How threatened could Andy Murray and David Ferrer be from a creature that’s commonly outsmarted by clean windows? And besides, THOSE GUYS ARE IN AUSTRALIA. That had to get past all of the crocodiles and kangaroos just to get to the match, and they’re gonna freak out over a couple birds. Those guys are worse than soccer players.

Run for cover, boys. You’d hate to end up like this guy: Read the rest of this entry »

This is video of British people driving a Mitsubishi EVO IX (note the steering column on the wrong side of the car). They're going about 180 mph when, about a minute into the video, they test a seagull's structural integrity.

YES! That. Was. AWESOME. 

There are no words for how badly I want a NASCAR race to happen down at the fishing docks.