Last we checked in on the Euro 2012 tournament, there were apparently stray dogs and soiled mattresses on the corners of every street in Kiev, but that wasn’t stopping European countries from sending their best soccer players to compete for the Henri Delaunay Trophy in between nailing every wannabe soccer WAG in sight.

Here’s a look at the Euro 2012 tournament field when action begins on June 8:

Um. There you have it. I think.

Unfortunately, the real news isn’t the actual games taking place in the Ukraine and Poland, but the trophy itself, as the radical Ukrainian feminist group FEMEN has tried and succeeded on multiple occasions to knock over the Delaunay Trophy during the preliminary trophy tour. But I don’t mean radical like, “GRRRRR VIOLENCE!” I mean it like, “Bro, they’re all topless.”

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The UEFA Executive Committee decided in 2007 to allow Poland and the Ukraine to co-host this year’s European Football tournament, because they never have before, so maybe they’d try to impress. Sixteen teams will compete at Euro 12 from June 8 through July 1 at the Donbass Arena Stadium in Donetsk, Ukraine, and so far it seems that everything will be fine, so long as the players and fans don’t mind stepping over thousands of stray dogs.

German Princess Maja von Hohenzollern has joined forces with animal groups and shelters in the Ukraine to raise awareness to the country’s terrible stray pet population, so they can start rounding some of these pooches up at shelters instead of sending a kill squad to start putting them all down. And while some stray dogs and cats aren’t nearly as bad as soiled mattresses, streets overrun with garbage and wild, diseased monkeys attacking people, it is still upsetting to know that people don’t care about giving pooches like these guys or this fella some help.

In other Euro 2012 news – so I can get my soccer post quota covered in one fell swoop – team officials from all over Europe are blasting Ukraine’s hotels for spiking prices to ridiculous levels, even for people with longstanding reservations. Obviously they’ve never tried to book a Spring Break in Daytona.

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