Tonight, on the With Leather WWE Raw open discussion thread:

The City of Brotherly Love is about to get its biggest dose of electricity since Benjamin Franklin: WWE Champion The Rock is back in town. With the various WrestleMania matches set, the Superstars are frothing at the mouth to get a piece of their rivals, from The Undertaker’s hunt for CM Punk (still at large with Paul Bearer’s urn) to Team Hell No’s quest to humble Dolph Ziggler & Big E Langston. But the faceoff the WWE Universe is most anticipating is that of Rock and John Cena, who will surely have words when The People’s Champion confronts his No. 1 contender. Here are five things to look forward to on this week’s Raw. (via WWE.com)

Our five-point preview:

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I apologize in advance for this, as it was written by an extremely old man.

The Nickelodeon Kids Choice Awards 2013 went down in Los Angeles on Saturday, and good Lord, I can’t even begin to explain it. When I was a kid, the Kids Choice Awards were a very straight-forward thing … they’d give a blimp to whichever celebrities were nice enough to show up, they’d give a “best team” award or whatever to whoever won the Super Bowl that year (which automatically made them the most popular team with kids), Michael Jordan or Paula Abdul or whoever would show up to get a lifetime achievement award and somebody would get slimed. That’s Nickelodeon’s thing, and I get it. I mean, I’ve seen basically every episode of ‘You Can’t Do That On Television’ (even the Alanis ones), so I know that when you say “water” you get a bunch of water dumped on you, and when you say “I don’t know” you get slimed.

Now they give awards to themselves (best cartoon: SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS! etc.) and slime EVERYBODY at ALL TIMES. Everything has slime coming out of it. The kids just go SCREEEEEEEEEEE the entire time, because they are reacting to stimulus response I guess, and there’s no set up or build or honor to being slimed. This year they slimed Dwight Howard, so obviously there is no prestige left anymore.

I cannot break down this highlight video, but I’m going to try.

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There it is. After the initial 16 entrants chosen by With Leather and the follow-up, fan-chosen 16, the first annual With Leather Bad Wrestling Theme Lyrics March Madness Tournament has its brackets and is ready to begin.

Now comes the hard part: trying to decide which of these is worse than the other.

On the following pages you’ll find the match-ups listed above. You’ll be asked to reconsider the song lyrics and make your decision in the individual polls under each battle. Your votes will be the only thing deciding the winner, so vote early and pressure everyone you know to vote for your favorite entrants. Votes will count until Monday, March 18. I’m pushing for an American Males/Buff Bagwell showdown in the With Leather bracket, but I’m not gonna be aggressive about it. I also kinda want Kaitlyn to shock the world and take the whole thing.

Anyway, you made this happen, so now let’s make it big. If you don’t, Biker Taker will EXPLODE AT YOU~.

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Last Friday, we introduced you to a new concept in “feeling bad for being a wrestling fan” — the 1st Annual With Leather Bad Wrestling Theme Lyrics March Madness tournament, a 32-seed throwdown between the worst sets of words jammed into a wrestler themes. If you’re like, “I didn’t know wrestling theme songs HAD lyrics,” be warned … they can get pretty bad.

The first 16 professionally-chosen entrants were announced, and the call went out to you, the fans, to pick the final 16. You suggested lyrics in the comments section of the first post, and while some of you decided to totally ignore the rules and post full songs, many of you made nominations and had your voices heard. What follows it the formal announcement of the Fan 16, who’ll start going head-to-head next week.

Check out the horrible, horrible songs included in the second half of the tournament and let us know how you think the seeding should go. What’s the worst of the second 16? Which lyrics don’t deserve to be in the tournament at all? YOU DECIDE!

(I mean, not right now, but eventually.)

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This week on Amor Prohibito...

Pre-show notes:

- If you’re unaware, I’m helping Best and Worst of Impact columnist Danielle with her new wrestling site, The Mandible Claw. There’s a new post up every weekday, and so far we’ve done a pretty rad podcast (which I’ll help host every week) and an incredible piece on Vickie Guerrero by Ari Amaru. This is seriously worth your time. Go read it, and keep reading it.

- Comments, shares, likes, and what-have-you are appreciated. Showing this column to wrestling types you know is the only way to keep it moving forward. Otherwise I’m stuck writing WrestleCrap entries in 2013 like some kind of weirdo.

- Follow us on Twitter @withleather, follow me personally @MrBrandonStroud and like us on Facebook.

- GIFS courtesy of Jerusalem at Punchsport Pagoda.

And now, Raw goes OLD SCHOOL! I bet you aren’t tired of hearing that yet. The Best and Worst of Old School Raw is after the jump.

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Tonight, on a very special Old School Raw open discussion thread:

WWE Universe, get ready to step back in time when Raw goes “Old School” tonight at 8/7 CT on USA Network. Here are five reasons you don’t want to miss this very special edition of Raw that has not been done since 2010. (via ” target=”_blank”>WWE.com)

Our five-point preview:

1. If you’d like to read the Best and Worst of the first Old School Raw, you can read that in the AOL FanHouse archives. It’s fun to see how the column has grown since then. I can’t remember being able to make people happy with one page and 10 paragraphs of jokes.

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