As Drake University’s 104th Drake Relays took place over the weekend, the most important part of the entire mess of whatever it is those people are doing didn’t take place until yesterday. That was when a 4-year old English Bulldog named Huckleberry was crowned this year’s Beautiful Bulldog, marking the end to the 34th year of this mascot competition. Why it took Drake 70 years to think of adding a bulldog beauty contest to the Drake Relays is neither here nor there, but I trust that it will be handled in time by the United States Congress and the people responsible – dead or alive – will be punished for their laziness accordingly.

So what about Huckleberry? Who’s a good widdle champion?

Read the rest of this entry »

Tomorrow marks the beginning of the 103rd annual Drake Relays at Drake University, at which more than 8,000 athletes and spectators will gather to participate in the record 120 events at this year’s competition. The Relays began in 1910 with 100 people both competing and cheering each other on. Now, the event is widely regarded at Iowa’s premier sporting event. Better luck next year, competitive corn shuckers.

But more importantly than any heptathlon, decathlon, or dodecahedronathon was the Drake Relays preliminary event that took place yesterday as the official launch to the week – the 33rd annual Drake Relays Beautiful Bulldog Contest. Fifty bulldogs showed up for this year’s poochstravaganza, and a bulldog named Tyson (above) was the ultimate good widdle boy. Joining Tyson’s court were:

Runner-up – Charlie
Oldest bulldog – Max, 10-year-old
Best Dressed – Flethcher, dressed as Jethro’s BBQ’s famous “Emmenecker” sandwich
Mr. Congeniality – Vinny
Miss Congeniality — Heartstopping Ittybitty
Farthest from the Doghouse – Pork Chop, from Cambridge, Minnesota

(Via the Des Moines Register)

I’ve definitely added the Drake Relays to my sports bucket list, but not because I want to go see a few thousand people try to be the best at exercising – although finding the next Allison Stokke should be any sports blogger’s greatest ambition. I just want to spend a whole day judging bulldogs for their costumes. Seriously, costumed bulldogs are the key to world peace, just look at the pictures after the jump and tell me you feel like doing anything other than rubbing a tummy or 50.

Read the rest of this entry »

Sometimes a headline says it all. Bulldogs, man. Bulldogs. Matt Ufford can have his corgis. I am the very proud owner of a corgi/pit bull mix and she’s the greatest. But I also adopted a pit bull once, and Bruno Rockefeller Burns was one of the greatest creatures that ever existed on this planet. He routinely farted in my face while I slept. He pissed in my laundry like it was on fire. But that little bastard chased a basketball better than Chris Bosh so it was worth it. He passed away two years ago and it broke my heart, but thankfully Drake University is around to pick up the poop.

On Monday, Drake hosted the 2011 Beautiful Bulldog Contest. It’s not a sport, and it’s certainly not dogs surfing to Point Break quotes, but damn it it’s a competition and it involved bulldogs, so you bet your sweet ass that I’m mentioning it and it’s a slideshow. Buckle up, monkeys, it’s bulldog time.

Read the rest of this entry »