This makes me want to plug my ears with my fingers and shout-sing DO WAH DIDDY DIDDY DUM DIDDY DO. (via Cosby Sweaters)

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Links

10 Athletes Who Would Have Been Greater If They Listened To Kenny F*cking Powers - If you missed this yesterday, kiss my ass and suck my dick, everyone. (but no, seriously, read it) [With Leather]

10 Celebrities Who Look Like Abandoned Mattresses - Somehow this may be the greatest meme in Internet history, simply for how accurate it is. Poor January Jones. [UPROXX]

Madonna Joins Twitter For A Day, Flirts With Deadmau5 - Prince should join Twitter, he should have a midi of one keyboard note playing in the background and every tweet should be the continuation of the same non-stop sentence. [UPROXX]

5 Directions Medicine Can Go In Now That Cancer Is Toast - More stuff that gives 70-year olds boners, please! [Gamma Squad]

Quick Hits: Verdicts and Renewal Odds on 5 New Television Series - Everything on CBS: loved and renewed. Everything on NBC: good stuff canceled, stuff that looks like it should be on CBS renewed. [Warming Glow]

Hunger Games Review: The Future is Blurry - I sure am excited to keep hearing people talk about this movie when I’m in line at the grocery store. [Film Drunk]

Question Of The Day: Who’s Copping The Air Yeezy 2? - I don’t know what that means. [Smoking Section]

20 Supporting Actors From ’90s TV Shows Then And Now - A nice follow-up to my Waldo Geraldo Faldo joke in yesterday’s Best and Worst Of WWE Raw report. [Buzzfeed]

‘Zou Bisou Bisou’ & 15 Other Awkward TV Serenades - David Brent and Greg Brady absolutely do not count. Uncle Jesse absolutely does. [HuffPost Comedy]

Forget Kony 2012, getting Steve Holt in the Arrested Development movie is the most important cause of the year - Steve Holt! Not getting arrested for public masturbation! [Fark]

‘Downton Abbey’ Gets an American Spoof With ‘Downton Arby’s’ - Great, now I want jalapeno poppers, a roast beef sandwich the size of my face and a Mountain Dew the size of the rest of my body. [The FW]

The 10 Best Shows in the Fox Network’s 25 Year History - I’m sure ‘Woops!’ is number 11 and Pajiba just made a mistake. [Pajiba]

And now, to cleanse your palate, here are 12 links about Peyton Manning.

- Follow us on Twitter @withleather
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Links

News Anchor Drops F-Bomb When She Hears That Peyton Manning Will Sign with Broncos - Not as funny as the eventual follow-up, “Tim Tebow drops f-bomb in church when he hears God has forsaken him”. [Brobible]

Careful What You Tebow For - When I Tebow, I like to Tebow for world peace. [Kissing Suzy Kolber]

Video: Tyler Honeycutt Baptizes Michael Beasley - I’m guessing this also has something to do with Tebow? [Smoking Section]

Best of Mechanical Bull Fails - I love that HuffPo thinks “not successful riding the mechanical bull until the end” is a “fail”. He slowly slid off! LOL! [HuffPost Comedy]

Everything These Drunken Dumbass Brothers Needed to Know About MMA They Learned From a Chuck Liddell Highlight - Advice: do not attempt to recreate anything you’ve ever seen in your own backyard. [Cage Potato]

Michael Bay says new TMNT will be “edgy, lovable, aliens” - Michael Bay’s only interpretation of science-fiction is “aliens”. He should remake the Twilight Zone and have ever ending just be “aliens”. [Film Drunk]

Our 30 Favorite Wondercon Cosplay Photos So Far - Every year they should retire one costume from cosplay rotation. This year it should be The Joker. Actually, that should’ve been every year for the past 20 years. [Gamma Squad]

Sofia Vergara Is the Deserved Cover Girl for the Sex Issue - At least in a still photo you can’t hear her yell “JYAYYYYYYY, JYAYYYYYYYY”. [Warming Glow]

The Best Of #Roger Sterling - “Being in blackface once, getting robbed once and emotionally harassing Joan all the time” memed onto a picture of him having a heart attack. [UPROXX]

UPROXX @ SXSW: A House For Lions, Youngblood Hawke And The Workaholics House Party - Or, “how I spent my Friday afternoon”. A very tight butthole gallery. In fact, the only loose butthole aspect of the day was the complete lack of Jillian. [UPROXX]

This Liquor Store Has The Best Signs - Finally, someone’s taken the concept of funny church signs and applied it to the secular world. [Buzzfeed]

Every Itchy & Scratchy From The Simpsons - 48 minutes of your time well spent, especially when it gets to the Poochie parts in the middle. [NextRound]

5 British Shows That Will Please the “Downton-Abbey” Loving Old Lady Within You - I was hoping “Oh Do Behave!” was on the list somewhere. [Pajiba]

JaVale McGee needs to get smart and start destroying people with his naturally occurring biology. (via IASID)

- Follow us on Twitter @withleather
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- Like us on Facebook.

Links

Sadly, Maria Sharapova Isn’t Running Around Giving Shower High-Fives - She’s just upset that they want pictures with her dog instead of with her. I bet Martina Hingis would high-five me in the shower. [ Brobible]

ROFLMNBAO: The NBA All-Star Weekend Edition - An uncouth linking to ourselves, but Burnsy is hilarious and this feature deserves at least as many comments as the wrestling posts. [With Leather

The World Needs More ‘Eastbound And Downton Abbey’ - Slide 8 is my favorite Kenny Powers quote ever, as if I didn’t already approve of this mash-up. [UPROXX]

5 Reasons Why Jaleel White Will Win ‘Dancing With the Stars’ - The moment the Urkel Dance music starts (“do it! DOOO IT! Evr’ybodaaaaaaaayy…”) I’m gonna lose my mind. [The FW]

The FilmDrunk Interview: Jason Mewes - He speaks some English, but he cannot speak it good like we do. [Film Drunk]

Pledge To Party On St. Patty’s Day & We’ll Donate $1K To Charity - How much will you donate if I pledge to stay at home on St. Patty’s day, watch movies and eat macrobiotic food? [Smoking Section]

30 Rejected Pieces Of Star Wars Merchandise We’d Totally Buy - These are way cooler than real Star Wars merchandise. A Death Star basketball, are you serious bro? [Gamma Squad]

Horrible YouTube Comments Immortalized In Web Series - This comment marked for spam. [UPROXX]

There Was Going to Be a ‘Community’ Porno? Tell Me More - I don’t want to see what they’d do with Leonard, but the Dungeons and Dragons episode would be AMAZING. [Warming Glow]

Steve Martin And Gwyneth Paltrow Feel Very Differently About Their Picture Together - Steve Martin’s face is starting to concern me. You’re a famous comedian, you don’t have to look 35 forever. [Buzzfeed]

17 Crazy/Awesome Japanese Commercials - Not as good as that Taiwanese weather report performed by like 10 girls who are also Power Rangers. [HuffPost Comedy]

Memento’s Brilliant, Beautiful Timeline - DON’T BELIEVE HIS LIES [Unreality]

I’m going to keep watching this until they get out.

- Follow us on Twitter @withleather
- Follow me personally @MrBrandonStroud and Burnsy @MayorBurnsy
- Like us on Facebook.

Links

Every Face Punch In ‘Road House’ Is Everything You Could Ever Ask For In A Supercut - I prefer that Bloodsport style of 80s-movie punch where you get hit and you turn and throw up blood, but maybe that’s just me. And Chong Li. [UPROXX]

Hanksy Broadens His Pop Culture Horizons With Cosby, Danson, And Gosling-Inspired Works - Somebody needs to add a Cosby sweater to every piece of graffiti ever. I want the HI HOW ARE YOU frog thing in Austin to have a Cosby sweater. [UPROXX]

Lindsay Lohan Will Host Saturday Night Live For Some Reason - She’s gotta promote those washed-out Terry Richardson cigarette ads somehow! [Warming Glow]

Scientists Create Substance That Could Let People Climb Like Spider-Man - My dreams are coming true. What a wonderful world wherein I might one day be able to dispatch a lightning guy by tossing a manhole cover at him! [Gamma Squad]

Oscar Voters Are 94% White, The Rest Are Erik Estrada And Lorenzo Lamas - The good news: now at least Midnight In Paris has a chance of winning stuff. [Film Drunk]

Peter King Says As An Underdog, We Underrate The Underdog Faction - “If your NFL market is experiencing signs of depression, consult your medical professional and have them sign journeyman returner Eddie Abilify.” [Kissing Suzy Kolber]

B.o.B.: So Good - Only if I get to look at Hayley Williams for every 45 seconds of him rapping. I could really use a wish right now. [Smoking Section]

Cage Potato’s Comprehensive 2012 MMA App Buyer’s Guide - Somebody should make an app about UK women’s mixed martial arts and call it “Angry Birds”. [Cage Potato]

Are ‘Downton Abbey’ Trading Cards Gonna Be the Next Craze? - Only if I have to tap Manor to use them. [The FW]

The 30 Reasons Why We’ll Miss ‘Downton Abbey’- They should let Whitney Cummings remake this show for CBS about a wacky girl trying to make it on her own in the big city and call it ‘Downtown Abby’. [Pajiba]

Sports Cards For Insane People: Have A Happy, Creepy Valentine’s Day! - The back of Greg “The Hammer” Valentine’s card is the best, I just wish the front said I BROKE WAHOO’S LEG, VALENTINE with hearts around it. [SB Nation]

Pierre Abernathy: The Dirty Dirty Sheets Interview - Check out this interview with the funniest pro wrestler you probably haven’t heard of. His moonsault is the stuff of legend. [DirtyDirtySheets]

Ron Swanson Is On IMDB - “Give me all the production credits you have.” [Buzzfeed]

C’mon, dude, there are plenty of other fish in that pool.

[via OTB]

- Follow us on Twitter @withleather
- Follow me personally @MrBrandonStroud and Burnsy @MayorBurnsy
- Like us on Facebook.

Links

UPROXX 2012 Grammy Awards Open Thread - In case you need to know what everyone’s talking about this morning. Quick recap: Adele won everything, Whitney Houston died, Nicki Minaj blows. [UPROXX]

Whitney Houston Dies At 48 - And if you missed that part, recreate the media’s response to Whitney’s death by playing the first 30 seconds of “I Will Always Love You” on loop. [Smoking Section]

George Lucas says Greedo ALWAYS shot first, you were just confused - I don’t want to be too crude on this blog, but George Lucas can eat my entire asshole. [Film Drunk]

A Compendium of Cool Comics Cosplay: February 10th - I’m not in this one, but you should check it out anyway. Big Barda ftmfw. [Gamma Squad]

Let’s Overanalyze These New ‘Game of Thrones’ Photos - Spoiler alert: all major characters die in the first episode of the new season, are replaced by those characters’ cousins. And Ashton Kutcher. [Warming Glow]

Nic Cage Broke His Legendary Time-Traveling Vampire Silence On Letterman - How did it get born? How did it get born HOW DID IT GET BORN? [UPROXX]

20 People Who Think Oprah Is Whitney Houston - Buzzfeed is making a killing off the 20 stupidest people to tweet every day. 20 people who think the moon is made of sandwiches! [Buzzfeed]

Newton Abbey: Newt Gingrich’s ‘Dream Team’ Photo Reminiscent Of ‘Downton Abbey’ - As if Newt could ever be that cool. [HuffPost Comedy]

Ahmed Best talks about a deleted Jar Jar Binks scene that really would have redeemed his character and made a huge difference in The Phantom Menace - Han and Greedo have guns pointed at each other, but instead of one shooting they both shoot Jar Jar. Is that what he’s talking about? [FARK]

Five Things About the Phantom Menace That Didn’t Suck - Lots of Star Wars links today, I guess. Thing 6: Jake Lloyd never acted again. [Unreality]

Norwegian News Mistakes Joke T-Shirt For Actual Eye Chart - Way to go, Norwegia. Some poor guy is walking around with a nickel, trying to buy a mustache ride. [The FW]