Although it’s nowhere near being my favorite “Cheers” spoof, this clip celebrating the Patriots’ roots in the old AFL [the old old AFL, not the new old AFL] actually makes Pats’ fans seem, I hate to say it, likable. They’re probably Montreal Allouettes fans. It certainly would explain those red jerseys. It’s like the trendy little brother of the Kansas City Chiefs jersey. No wonder that league failed.
For a better, more honest look at Pats’ fans, follow me after the jump. Read the rest of this entry »
If you didn’t hate Browns quarterback Brady Quinn before, you might after you hear what the former Notre Dame star did to try to sabotage teammate Derek Anderson and help his own standing in Cleveland’s quarterback competition.
Coming off a 4-12 season, the Browns obviously have a lot to work on. Derek Anderson said the radio receiver in his helmet wasn’t working Sunday, so he had to work with hand signals. Anderson said Brady Quinn, who was quarterbacking the White team, schooled White defenders on those hand signals, which made it harder for Anderson to work a drive filled with short passes. Details, details, details. via, via.
C’mon, Brades. Even Nathan Lane thinks that’s catty. All we heard about during the 2007 NFL draft was “what a great person” Brady Quinn was. I didn’t buy it then and I don’t now. Quinn is just Nick Lachey with a stronger arm. Which probably means Mangini will start him every game this season.
The ESPYs were last night, and the event holds little value to me since it’s ESPN and there’s still no award for “Transgender Athlete Of The Year,” the award for which should be a 3-night stay at Eddie Murphy’s house. Get it? Because…that one time…ah, forget it.
Anyhoo, we need to have a little conversation about Matt Leinart, who’s already been his own boy band for some time. It’s an image he’s been trying to fight, literally, for a while now, and then he goes and does this. And I get that the ESPYs is not exactly black-tie, but you’re telling me that you couldn’t do any better than some baby blue sweater that your mom bought for you? You look like a third grader on picture day. Buy a jacket. Put it on. Buy pants that fit. I know life is hard for a pro quarterback in July, but you can do it. This is a lot easier than pretending to be a leader in an NFL locker room.
Here are more images of peeps at the ESPYs. I think the woman in the black dress looks pretty good. Really, how hard is it to get dressed up for one of these things? They rolled out a red carpet for you people. A RED CARPET! No one mockingly throws on any old thing in the face of such prestigious floor covering! Although I should talk: I don’t even wear pants to work. But, to be fair, my carpet is more like a light beige number. I like beige. I like to roll around on it in my underwear after I get irritated for people’s poor wardrobe choices. UPDATE: I’ve been told this pic is from last year’s ESPYs, but it’s hard to confirm because 1) the image is undated and 2) I don’t really care. via via
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No matter how many times you read stories about people’s cars burning at stadium parking lots because they parked on top of burning coals, people still go to stadium parking lots and park over burning coals. And shockingly, their cars burn. And sometimes, if you’ve been good little boys and girls, Santa makes sure that one of those cars is a Porsche. Ever met a likable person with a Porsche? Me neither.
Anyway, after the Giants played like ass and lost on Sunday, some drunk Giants decided to make the most of the situation by attacking a couple of the destroyed vehicles with an aluminum bat and their sneaker-adorned feet of fury. I can’t decide if this is the most rational reaction possible or the biggest display of drunken douchebaggery in recent history. The video evidence definitely suggests the latter, though.
More Porsche destruction after the jump, courtesy The 700 Level (times two).
Burton’s new “Love” series of snowboards — a collaboration with Playboy that features pin-ups from the 1970s on the boards — has liberals, feminists, Girl Scouts, and assorted Vermont douchebags all pissed off.
[T]he company has found itself at the center of a growing controversy in the liberal state, with residents, students, and politicians debating free speech and sexism on the ski slopes. The Burlington City Council discussed asking Burton to withdraw the boards, and the Girl Scout Council of Vermont is considering taking concerns to lawmakers next month.
Oh no, they’ve mobilized the Girl Scouts!!! In all seriousness, if I stretch to the very limits of my sympathy, I can kind of see how parents might not want their young children exposed to the images on the boards. But then I read this:
“When you really think about it, it’s a young man standing on top of a naked woman’s body,” said [Nicole] Zarrillo, 38, an office manager for a nonprofit based in Burlington, also home to Burton’s headquarters. “I probably could have gotten past it, because I try to have an open mind, but seeing it like that, it’s offensive.”
“Well, I tried to accept something I didn’t like, but then my oversensitive inner bitch came out. Turns out that everything I see is a metaphor for man’s oppression of women. HEY! I saw the way you looked at me, buster! Don’t even THINK about telling me I look nice today!”
Dallas Stars forward Sean Avery, famous for being a colossal dick on the ice, added to his infamy off of it with his comments regarding his ex-girlfriends and other NHL players (past flames Elisha Cuthbert and Rachel Hunter are now with the Flames’ Dion Phaneuf and the Kings’ Jarret Stoll, respectively). In case you missed it, he offered this up to reporters before anyone asked him a question:
“I just want to comment on how it’s become like a common thing in the NHL for guys to fall in love with my sloppy seconds. I don’t know what that’s about, but enjoy the game tonight.”
In response, NHL commissioner Gary Bettman has suspended Avery indefinitely. Seriously: indefinitely. Which is awesome. Because let’s face it, what he said was kinda true and not really all that bad. He basically got suspended because everyone’s tired of him being a dick.
Also, I think you technically forfeit the right to use the term “sloppy seconds” if you’ve ever hit on Paris Hilton.
UPDATE: Video of the statement after the jump. Read the rest of this entry »
