AHHH MR. FREEZE IS HERE I GET TO FIGHT MR. FREEZE

AHHHH I GOT THE GRAPNEL BOOST NOW I CAN BATMAN AROUND TOWN

AHHHHHHHHH

Links

The 10 Finest Celebrity Teenage Mutant Ninja Noses - I don’t know if I hate this or if I love it, so click over and decide for yourself. And while we’re at it, ears sorta look like Foot Soldier heads. [UPROXX]

FilmDrunk’s Guide to Oscar Season - It’s going to be really depressing when The Help wins everything. No movie wherein “MMM MMM I LOVES ME SOME FRIED CHICKEN” is said without irony should be considered for major awards in 2011. [Film Drunk]

YES: Carla Gugino Joins ‘Justified’! (Bonus: Gratuitous Carla Gugino Gallery) - From a Kevin Arnold love interest to a Zack Morris love interest to a The Comedian love interest, Carla Gugino has been sexy and awesome for at least 20 years. At least. [Warming Glow]

The Best And Worst of WWE Raw 10/17: El Mejor Y Peor - Don’t forget to read and comment on this. It’s right below you! It’s the one with pictures of muscly girls in their underpants! [With Leather]

Soulja Boy Arrested For Weed, Releases Movie All In One Day - Tomorrow when he wakes up, he should take a look at himself in the mirror and ask, “What’s up?” [Smoking Section]

Mo’ Worlds, Mo’ Problems: Future World, Fifth World and Ancient History Problems - C-A-R, P-A, T-H-I-A, no info for the, D-E-A. [Gamma Squad]

Selena Gomez Gets Her Gangsta’ On - I want your life, Justin Bieber. I want it. I will use my Genesis Machine to steal your youth. [Buzzfeed]

Is This the Best or Worst Movie Costume in History? - The worst. THE WORST. [Moviefone]

Adult Swim’s Oddities of Stop Motion - This is honestly a really cool list, and one that makes me wish more Internet top tens or whatever attempted objectivity. [Adult Swim]

Cannot Be Unseen of the Day - The best news about America in at least a few years. [The Daily What]

5 TV Characters That Prove You Don’t Have to Be “Manly” to Be an Awesome Man - Crush girls now. Couldn’t last year. Oh you like me now? Well that’s weird. [Pajiba]

An Amazing Super Mario Bros. Wedding Invitiation - My friends Randy and Jenny just got married using Scott Pilgrim-themed invitations just like this. I hope the “Congratulations! You Chose Vegan!!!” card graphic is just Toad shrugging his shoulders. [Unreality]

KANA, Sara Del Rey, and my heart somewhere in the middle.

Links

The Wrestling Podcast: Brandon Stroud II - In my second TWP appearance I talk WWE walkout stats, compare Anarchy Championship Wrestling’s ACH to Childish Gambino, discuss how and why we hate Brian Wilson and talk up the importance of fat guys in pro graps. Also, I love those women in the header, and you can sorta tell. [The Wrestling Blog]

Childish Gambino – “All The Shine” - Speaking of, I am excited for “Camp”, and you don’t have to explain the French cinema references. [The Smoking Section]

Remedial Chaos Theory - Speaking of speaking of, last night’s episode of ‘Community’ was incredible, so if you missed it, watch it here. Six times. [NBC]

Surprise, Guy Fieri Is A Total Dick - In the least shocking news of the year, America’s Worst Food Person is anti-Semitic and scared of gay people. I guess the spiked blonde hair and the sunglasses and the bowling shirts and the chain wallets and the throwing up of horns weren’t good enough indicators. [Warming Glow]

Who Voltron’d It Better? - Voltron is one of those things I always hoped would still be available when I became a hot shot movie director. That doesn’t seem to be working out for me, but … uh, anybody on the UPROXX network secretly VP at Sony or something? [Gamma Squad]

The New Muppets Trailer Makes Me Happy - …even if they’ve got to add a bunch of farts to get 2011′s kids to see it. Puppet Dracula from Forgetting Sarah Marshall had better make a cameo in this somewhere. [Filmdrunk]

The 10 Finest Pop Culture Charts From Dan Meth’s Pop Culture Charts Series - That “Trilogy Meter” is so wrong I can’t even begin to explain it. Jurassic Park is only about as good as the original X-Men? Are you on drugs? [UPROXX]

Hot Potato Gallery: Model/Grappler Monique Minton - When I grow up, I want to be a “model/grapper”. [Cage Potato]

Sports Cards For Insane People: Fleer Pro-Visions - Yeah, not going to pretend I have any f**king idea what the hell is going on on these cards. [SBN]

Sean Taylor Memorial Meast Of The Week/Jeff George Memorial least Of The Week: Week 5 - Easily the best photoshop ever added to the top of an UPROXX Network post. Everything that happens in the NFL should relate to Super Mario Kart in some way. [Kissing Suzy Kolber]

Last September, Reggie Bush admirably forfeited the Heisman Trophy he won in 2005 after an NCAA investigation revealed that he had received improper benefits in college. You know, like everyone else who has ever played football in college. “I have made the difficult decision to forfeit my title as Heisman winner of 2005,” he said. “The persistent media speculation regarding allegations dating back to my years at USC has been both painful and distracting.” Well, apparently by “forfeit my title” he didn’t mean “forfeit my trophy,” because it’s been nine months and the statue still hasn’t found its way back to the Heisman Trophy Trust. Whoops!

According to The Dan Patrick Show (your #1 source for DP), the trophy disappeared shortly after Bush publicly acknowledged that he was returning it, and after the Heisman Trophy Trust had publicly thanked him.

We called Bush’s agent for comment about the status of the trophy, but received no response. We did find out where Bush’s trophy was last September, just before the Heisman Trust asked for it back.

According to a person in management at the San Diego Hall of Champions, the Heisman Trophy was displayed there until just after the Heisman Trust’s decision to strip Bush of the trophy. “Reggie Bush’s dad came in right after and took it. That’s the last we saw of it.”

So… Reggie’s dad stole the Heisman? Is this the beginning of an MTV Film?

The source at the Heisman Trophy Trust told us that there was no specific agreement with Reggie Bush to return the trophy, but that it was “alluded to in Reggie’s statement and the whole world reasonably expected him to return it.”

The Heisman Trust source added that they had been in touch with Bush’s agent “more than once” about the status of returning the trophy. Also, Bush would not even have to pay for shipping. The Heisman Trust would send him a case for the Heisman Trophy, with shipping paid for.

Anybody who saw the stand-up comedy portion of “Community” star Donald Glover’s IAMDONALD tour knows Reggie Bush has a history of stealing. I guess Reggie believes what a lot of people believe: that if you borrow something from somebody and they don’t remind you to give it back, you get to keep it forever. That works for promises, too. If you promise something, just don’t do it long enough, and maybe the person you promised will forget.

Of course, trophy or no trophy, Reggie is no longer acknowledged as a Heisman winner. He’s just Leslie Knope, fishing the Dorothy Everton Smythe Award out of the trash and sneaking it into her office.