Doin' It Well is a celebration of some of the best comments from the previous week at With Leather. It is compiled by the editorial staff and runs every Monday.
In one of the comment threads last week, I made it known that I dislike the "Fixed" comments. For those of you who are unaware of this formulaic, template-style joke, it's the most popular form of making an unfunny comment since the heyday of "You're with me, ______." (Yes, I recognize the irony of me writing that, given the name of this blog.)
It goes like this: Step 1 — copy and paste part of blog post. Step 2 — change a word or words, then place those words in bold. Step 3 — Write "Fixed." Somewhere along the line, someone thought this was clever. It is not.
As an added bonus to being unoriginal and unfunny, it's also insulting to the writer of the post. "Fixed!" Hey, fuck you, it wasn't broken. I wrote it that way for a reason, asshole. If I ever meet the person who coined this lazy excuse for humor, I will punch him in the solar plexus. If it is a woman, I may settle for ugly name-calling. Unless it's a hooker, in which case she's as good as dead anyway.
After the jump, good examples of people who didn't piss me off.
This week I'm going to give out the awards based on degree of difficulty. Rape jokes are tough to make funny, and they're especially tough when you find out an Olympic sprinter from Trinidad and Tobago is a serial rapist, which is why I made clear my official stance against rape. But these commenters were undeterred:
- Otto Man: I, for one, applaud your bold stand against rape. What are your feelings about puppies and apple pie? Raping them, I mean.
- MMP: I'm holding judgement on rape until I see some hard data.
- Angel Eyes Van Cleef (for now): He should have gotten himself a bike. Whenever i have any overwhelming urges i go for a long ride, then later, when i get home, i fuck it. Behind a locked door. In your face bike fucker guy.
- Rob: "The Queens Borough Parks Department: Enabling rapes for over 110 years."
- lieutenant winslow: seriously, i know i joke around a lot, but this guy is a fucking scumbag and i hope he rots in hell. rape is supposed to be something special that is shared between a man and an unconscious stripper.
- twoeightnine: So we're anti-rape now? Time to order new business cards.
- MaxwellDemon: He was using the cream and the clear for a while, so two of those rapes no longer count.
Really tremendous stuff, everybody. Thank you. And for those who participated in the delightful threads about women's tennis players cooking and the '86 Mets doing drugs, your work is also appreciated. Keep doin' it well.