I will probably never do a Sports On TV column for the Disney Channel hit ‘Jessie.’ Not that I wouldn’t cover a kid’s show — I’ve already done SOTV entries for ‘Arthur’ and ‘Mighty Morphin’ Power Rangers’ after all — but I lost track of what was going on on the Disney Channel when the Suite Life kids started living on a boat. I mean, uh, when I was 8-years old.
If a ‘Jessie’ SOTV does happen, page one will have to feature this Emmy Award-quality guest spot from Chris Bosh, set to air on Friday. Read this carefully, so you don’t lose track of the ‘Downton Abbey’-esque plot:
Chris Bosh is set to guest star in Disney’s Jessie episode titled, “Say Yes to the Messy Dress.” Among other things, we learn that Bosh’s aptitude on the court comes can be attributed to (at least in part) a putrid pair of lucky socks. The episode airs January 18, 2013 on Disney Channel. (via SLAM Online)
I’ve included a few clips below. Chris Bosh acting against a bunch of children. WHO YA GOT?
We’ve endorsed him for New Orleans Hornets owner before, but comedian-slash-pro-wrestling-manager-slash-Air-Sex-Pioneer-slash-everything-else Chris Trew should already be running the team and throwing together Alonzo Mourning handshakes for pregame festivities. Make this happen, anyone in charge of basketball.
ROFLMNBAO: The NBA Weekend In Pictures - First, two links from us we want to make sure you don’t miss … the first is Burnsy’s loving tribute to Kissing Suzy Kolber, wherein big white block letters make people like Khloe Kardashian acceptable. Click through this, love it, drop a comment. [With Leather]
The Best And Worst Of WWE Raw 12/26: Hate Leads To Suffering - If we can get this back up to 150 comments on the reg I’m going to give away more cash (two people have already won 50 bucks each for retweeting the last pay-per-view report) so if you read the report, get over there and comment. Eventually you’re going to comment on everything you read and I will stop bugging you about it. WRESTLING, YAY [With Leather]
Peter King Has A Theory - Doesn’t he always? P.S. the Discount Double-Check is my new favorite gif. I feel like I could watch it forever. [Kissing Suzy Kolber]
Seems Appropriate, Disney Channel - Eating disorder jokes aren’t anything new to the Disney Channel (that episode of The Suite Life when London has to lose weight, for example … yes I can make that reference) but Demi Lovato almost lost her mind to one so they should probably cool it. Also, show more cartoons and stop making 12 year olds rich. [Warming Glow]
The Avengers Will Be Converted To 3D In Post -Hugo was amazing in 3D. Also, nothing else should be 3D again ever. [Film Drunk]
Fat Joe And Chris Brown Have Made Another Terrible Song - I can’t confirm it, but I’m going to go ahead and say that Fat Joe is the Uncle Kracker of hip-hop. Chris Brown is a crazy monster. They love to drink! This is not good. [Smoking Section]
A Portal 2 VGA Acceptance Video Trying To Trick Me Into Thinking Half-Life 3 Exists - I’m just going to keep pretending that a Half-Life 2: Episode 3 lives in my house and can be played whenever I want and that Valve doesn’t secretly hate and resent me. [Gamma Squad]
Hot Potato: 15 Photos of PXC Ring Girl Abby Poblador - Have mercy. Oh, and by the way, Cage Potato’s slide viewer should make you really appreciate how reader-friendly ours is. [Cage Potato]
Let’s Take A Moment To Blow Up Christmas Ornaments In Slow Motion - Yes, let’s! [UPROXX]