As much as I profess to hate the sports-inspired rap offerings of guys like Chet Haze, I am a sucker for a corny, over-the-top musical tribute to professional athletes. Enter these Chicago Bears fans – led by Justin Butler in the middle – who recently recorded this ode to Devin Hester, “Hest is the Best.” Hest? I suppose it’s better than Gipple, Celeste, Kest, Loleola… Bovary!

Here’s a lyrical sample from Butler’s Bears anthem…

Hest is the best, meets the test, you know the man is blessed. You know he’s the man with the plan, he runs it back as fast as he can.

Man, I love the rhyming ease of clichéd sports lines. The song is now available on iTunes as well, in case you were looking for a ringtone that will be outdated after the Green Bay Packers win this weekend. Aw, I kid, Bears fans. I save my real hatred for the Cubs.

Bear down for the video after the jump…

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Although it was Bears kicker Robbie Gould that sealed the deal for Chicago in their win against Green Bay on Monday night, it was their punt returner that Devin Hester who provided the spark that put his team back in the game. Before his big return on Monday, many speculated whether Hester needed to quit punt returning altogether. Now it seems that the opposite may be true.

Hester is one of the guys in the past few years that came into the league playing on one side of the ball and then asked to switch at some point in his career. For his punt return production to drop while taking on the Bears’ offensive playbook seems inevitable. To me, anyway.

Furthermore, Hester’s additional responsibilities wouldn’t disqualify him as the guy most qualified for that job. He just has a little bit more on his mind now. It’s also worth nothing that, as a wide receiver, he has been getting hit anywhere form 5 to 15 times more in a given game than before.

If Chicago really wants that Devin Hester magic back, they’ll put him back on defense and give him the chance to focus on punt returning. They can only spread a guy so thin, and Lovie Smith will have to decide how badly he wants to maintain the most dangerous weapon in the NFL.

There's plenty of buzz this morning about the Pats' narrow escape from the Eagles on Sunday Night Football, but you won't hear about it here — the game was too well-played to get a featured spot in the weekly examination of Who Sucked the Most.

Those honors go specifically to (a) some key players in a pair of exciting overtime games and (b) Eli Manning.  Last thing first: young Elisha showed that he still gets jittery in the pocket, throwing four interceptions in the Giants' 41-17 loss to the Vikings — three of which were returned for TDs, which made me feel great about keeping the Minnesota D safely ensconced on my fantasy bench.

Also receiving votes: Neil Rackers and the Arizona Cardinals.  The Cards wasted 484 passing yards from Kurt Warner in a heartbreaking 37-31 OT loss to the woeful 49ers.  Rackers kicked a game-winning 27-yard field goal in overtime, but a delay of game penalty nullified it, and Rackers missed the ensuing attempt from 32.  On the Cards' next possession, Warner's tiny hands fumbled the ball in the end zone, where Tully Banta-Cain fell on it to give San Fran its third win of the season (and second against Arizona).

But the hands-down suckiest loser has to be the Broncos' special teams unit.  Devin Hester had two returns for touchdowns, and a blocked punt set up another Bears TD in a 37-34 OT win for Chicago.  Dude, you just don't kick it to Hester.  Not unless you have Josh Brown kicking off.

Between the Bears' defense and Devin Hester, I think it's safe to say Rex Grossman's going to keep his job. Hester returned two kickoff returns for touchdowns in the Bears' 42-27 win over the Rams last night, breaking the NFL record for touchdown returns in a season. Along with last night's kickoffs, he has three punt returns and the 108-yard missed FG backbreaker against the Giants for a total of six.

Not that we should be too surprised, given this highlight reel of his college returns.

Granted, the most impressive returns are against Temple and Duke, so it's kind of like winning a quiz bowl against retarded kids, but still. His legs are blurry when he runs. Similar to girls when I talk to them.