It has been a few months since I was finally able to extinguish the last of my raging hatred of Dwight Howard for what he did to my beloved Orlando Magic, but I’m actually glad that I can look at him in a new, unbiased light. It wouldn’t be a typical NBA season if Howard’s people weren’t leaking his complaints to certain people in the “media” and, sure enough, ESPN reported this week that a Howard trade may be imminent.

While this has been corroborated by other people who claim to know – translated: they have Howard’s cousin’s email address – it was pretty much a done deal once everyone realized two things: 1) The Lakers just aren’t good with this old, injured lineup and 2) Howard still clearly wants to play in Brooklyn. However, much like he did with the Magic, Howard is doing his little song and dance routine with the Lakers by saying that he doesn’t want to be traded and will “bring it”.

Perhaps that has something to do with Nets star Deron Williams responding to the Howard rumors by saying that Brook Lopez won’t be going anywhere. Maybe it’s because he and Kobe Bryant got into it again in the locker room in a heated confrontation that they’ll probably deny again. Or maybe someone simply sat down with Howard, drew a bunch of zeroes on a piece of paper and told him what he’ll lose if he leaves L.A.

Like with his childish drama in Orlando, we probably won’t ever get a true story out of Howard for this case of déjà vu, but as an NBA expert and world famous analyst, I believe that the Lakers should trade Howard now. There are plenty of teams that can offer value, and I have broken down the Top 10 of those with proposed trades that are in no way mocking his value right now. Right, winking giraffe?

Read the rest of this entry »

Brooklyn Nets guard Deron Williams is still reveling in the limelight of Team USA’s gold medal run at the 2012 Summer Olympics, as he added his star power to the Barclays Pro-Am golf tournament last week. At some point during his appearance at the golf tournament that bears his new arena’s name, Williams ran into former President and Gold Medal Poonhound Bill Clinton, as Williams Tweeted the above photo on Sunday. Unfortunately, it was not taken at a strip club, which is where I like to think all Clinton pictures should be taken.

For the Pro-Am, Williams was paired with Masters champion Bubba Watson, and it’s worth mentioning that Watson and Rickie Fowler won the 2012 Awesomest Golfers in the World award, as Watson agreed to stay in a house with three U.S. soldiers who had been wounded in combat, and Fowler had Air Force staff sergeant Nick Bradley serve as his caddy. Bradley was injured in an IED attack in Afghanistan four years ago, and doctors told him that he’d never walk again. So it’s pretty awesome that he was out there caddying a full round of golf. Because of that, I wish that it had been Watson or Fowler in the picture with Slick Willy. Or, you know, Nick Bradley.

Alas, it was just Williams. And while I still thought that was pretty cool, I remembered that it’s definitely not the coolest picture that Clinton has ever taken. No, that photo was taken back in May.

Read the rest of this entry »

I’m still planning to wait until tomorrow to unleash my incredible, unparalleled NBA Draft Preview on your asses, but I’m pretty happy that the Houston Rockets have finally stirred the pot and created some excitement for us fans of franchises that blow. Apparently the Rockets are hellbent on wrangling as many first round draft picks as they can, and they took one step closer to fruition of their diabolical plan today when they shipped Chase Budinger to the Minnesota Timberwolves for the No. 18 pick.

This was perhaps the best response I saw regarding that trade.

Now the Rockets have the 14th, 16th, and 18th picks in Thursday night’s draft, and it’s no secret at all that they covet disgruntled drama queen Dwight Howard, who may or may not have once again told the Orlando Magic that he wants to be traded to the Brooklyn Nets. So are those three picks enough to get Howard?

Houston’s first-round assets will create an intriguing proposition for the Magic and their new general manager, Rob Hennigan. Just a week into his job, Hennigan will be faced with his first major player-personnel decision.

The Magic have maintained they don’t want to go through another season like they just did, when the drama surrounding Howard and his future dominated Orlando’s every move. Multiple first-round picks might be the enticing offer Orlando needs to break free from Howard. (Via USA Today)

It should be noted that aside from a few rumblings about “sources close to Howard”, Howard is still recovering from back surgery and hasn’t talked to anybody about his future since the Stan Van Gundy mess, when he had TMZ on speed dial. In fact, as far as anyone knows, Howard hasn’t even had contact with new Magic GM Rob Hennigan yet.

But while the Miami Heat celebrate and Anthony Davis trademarks his eyebrows in time to be called by the New Orleans Hornets, all we’ve got are rumors. So let’s entertain this one a little further…

Read the rest of this entry »

I took a couple weeks off from doing these here ROFLMNBAO posts for two reasons: 1) because the last two weeks of the season were soooooo boring and B) I forgot. But I figured what better time than now to resume posting these NBA meme pictures since the news that they’re so in demand. Form a line to the left, attractive girls who want to give me money to create ridiculously corny-sounding sites!

Also, I figured it was a better time than any for this week’s installment with the playoffs in full swing and individual awards being presented by the league. As we already know, Tyson Chandler is the Defensive Player of the Year, Jason Kidd received the Sportsmanship Award and Gregg Popovich is the Coach of the Year. “What about the other awards?” you ask while peeling apart the pages of my vintage Hustler collection. The NBA is taking its sweet ass time with those, so I’m issuing my own awards.

A lot happened in this condensed season, so it’s only fair that we recognize everyone for their efforts.

Read the rest of this entry »

New Jersey Nets owner Mikhail Prokhorov and Dallas Mavericks owner Mark Cuban are living out their own WWE storyline.

For those of you who don’t follow professional wrestling, here’s how a modern WWE storyline works. Remember when the guys you watched as a kid would punch each other and lay snakes on each other and rip off one another’s crucifixes? Now they just talk. They badmouth each other on Twitter, that turns into them badmouthing each other in person (for several weeks, usually) until the final, underwhelming conclusion that would’ve been great if they’d been guys who actually hated each other, and not just rich folks pretending on the Internet.

On Tuesday, Mikhail said the following awesome underwater-training thing about Cuban, should he try to sign Nets point guard Deron Williams in free agency:

“May the best man win,” Prokhorov quipped. “If he wins, I will crush him with the kickboxing throwdown.”

I had no idea the NBA settled their contract disputes with kickboxing, but it’d go a long way toward explaining why the owners are always getting kicked in the face. Cuban can’t respond with an IF I CAN CHANGE, WE ALL CAN CHANGE speech until the fight’s over, so (because the greatest talking point of a WWE speech is always “I’ve done well in WWE”) he evoked his time as a special guest host for World Wrestling Entertainment as evidence of his ability to resist kickboxing damage by … I don’t know, shoving?

From ESPN:

“He obviously didn’t see me be the first in WWE history to put Sheamus on the mat,” Cuban replied Wednesday night via email, referring to his guest host appearance on “Monday Night Raw” in 2009. “He knows not what he gets himself into.”

As funny as that is, Cuban failed to mention that his WWE appearances always end badly. Proof:

Read the rest of this entry »

Welcome to Part 1 of a However Many Part It Takes series of With Leather’s Guide to Understanding the Shortened NBA Season. Some of these will attempt to answer your questions while others will confuse you more. Enjoy.

The moment that news scrolled across the bottom of my TV screen during whatever college game I was watching that the NBA owners and players had tentatively reached a deal, my first thought was: “Oh sh*t, here it comes.” Sure enough, my Facebook feed was instantly filled with “Let’s go Heat” and “Title time for Miami” status updates. Sure, most of them were poorly spelled and possibly even written by early 19th century immigrants, but I knew it was coming and for the first time since the “Big 3” teamed up, my response was: “Yup.”

When free agency begins and training camps open, NBA teams will scatter and attack like rabid animals to try and prepare for the 66-game season that not many people thought would even happen. And we’re going to see reports right away that players are out of shape and some will even experience injuries. After all, that’s how we got to this point – guys working hard only when it matters and not preparing for the worst.

As always, I’m not an expert on anything, but I am a big NBA fan – an unapologetic and constantly depressed Orlando Magic homer – and I am both agitated and fascinated by this shortened season. I’m not predicting the future by any means, but if I had to guess, we’re in for so much more than we bargained for this season.

Read the rest of this entry »