Here’s that Jordan Brand ad of Carmelo Anthony of the Denver Nuggets playing with four other Carmelo Anthonys of the Denver Nuggets. They’re taking on five other Carmelo Anthonys, who also appear to be from the Denver Nuggets. Carmelo is also coaching the game, taking photos, sitting courtside as a fan and providing color commentary. No wonder they’ve been calling his number all night. I’m not sure what they’re selling here, aside from an all-black sneaker and the style of wearing black socks the way that your dad does whenever he mows the lawn. Meh, it’s still fun. Carmelo is not, however, doing the team’s laundry or selling hot dogs, because Mr. Anthony finds that to be “b:tch work.” Read the rest of this entry »

There was a fun story the other day about how even though Isiah Thomas’s return to the New York Knicks got the kibosh from the league because of that little matter of him still coaching a NCAA team, he’s still weighing in on some of the more relevant league matters. For instance, Thomas insists that Carmelo Anthony will be traded to either the Chicago Bulls or the Knicks. Fittingly, the Nuggets already told the Knicks they don’t have any desirable pieces and talks with the Bulls fizzled after Chicago refused to include Joakim Noah in a deal. But that doesn’t mean that other teams aren’t giving it their best.

After heavy criticism for sitting on their hands during July’s free agent frenzy, the New Jersey Nets seem desperate most-willing to work toward an amicable deal for the superstar. New Jersey has already made at least one offer but Denver is demanding Brooks Lopez in any deal, and the Nets aren’t willing to give up a centerpiece player. Now someone like Jarvis Hayes, on the other hand…

Demand that we offer Lobster Dog in any future transactions, Pro Basketball Talk:

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How come there’s always some jackass that has to ruin things for everyone?  Things like bringing your own bottle of vodka on flights to Vegas so you can pass it around the back of the plane, or knocking boots in public (Hypotheticals. I swear…).  Well NBA players–and I imagine other sport leagues might follow suit–can thank Gilbert Arenas and Javaris Crittenton for getting their in-flight poker privileges taken away.

Following the Arenas/Crittenton scuffle, the Washington Wizards and New Jersey Nets are the first teams to ban gambling on team flights.  However, the Denver Nuggets crew isn’t taking this ban lightly.

“I definitely don’t think that’s something teams should do,” said [Chauncey] Billups, one of the NBA’s most respected players. “I think that when it’s done in the right way, that’s great camaraderie. Everybody likes to gamble whether it’s any kind of card game. Whatever it is, I think that it’s who you gamble with. I think that it’s the stakes that you gamble for.

“For our team, we gamble for small money. Just to waste time. Twenty dollars. If we gambled for $2,000, $2,500, $3,000, now that messes with your camaraderie. Now, when someone wants to get paid … it’s like ‘I don’t want to be around this guy.’ I think it’s about what you gamble for and who you’re with … We’re not gambling to pay bills. We’re just gambling to have fun.”–Fanhouse.com

Also speaking up against the ban are Melo, Arron Affalo, and Chris Andersen’s hair.  One might argue that if it’s “just to waste time”, why do they need to play for money at all regardless of the amount?  But everyone knows that everything is better when money is involved.  Kinda like working, or doing chores…or blowjobs–you know, all the big stuff.  The players are right, though.  Everyone shouldn’t be punished because of the actions of two idiot thugs.  If it were a recurring problem, fine;  but the guilty parties really should be the only ones held accountable here with maybe a “let this be a lesson to you” warning to the rest of the league.

Some of you have been emailing me about this Dirk Nowitzki custody story, to which I have made the Mancini Metaphorical Wanking Motion. Sure, an NBA player filing papers to actually care for his kid has a great dog-bites-man man-bites-man man-bites-dog feel to it, but I just don’t care.

But video Kenyon Martin cussing out Mark Cuban? Yes, please. And maybe it’s just me, but I always thought “fa66ot motherfcuker” had six syllables in it, not three. Obviously Mark Cuban ran back to his office to Google “Fay mofo,” which is either a new baseball blog or some obscure episode of “30 Rock.” Whatever, dude.

You saw a pretty good basketball game if you stayed up to watch Game 2 of the NBA Western Conference finals last night. The Denver Nuggets came back from a 14-point deficit to beat the Lakers on their own floor, 106-103. Carmelo Anthony and Chauncey Billups each played over 40 minutes; they scored 34 and 27 points, respectively.

The Nuggets really had some strange calls in their favor throughout the second half that (in my view) prevented the Lakers from pulling away; Derek Fisher missed a three at the end of the game that would have given LA a 2-0 lead tied the game at the end of regulation. But Denver hung on to even the series, and I wonder if self-appointed thug-watch advocate Mark Cuban has started referring to Denver in his internal memos as “the N_gge_s.” It’s funny because he’s a white guy from the midwest, and therefore obviously racist.

Elsewhere, the Pittsburgh Penguins jumped to a 2-0 lead in their conference final, thanks to an Evgeni Malkin hat trick as the zzzzzzzzzzzzzz…Oh, and the Minnesota Twins beat the snot out of the White Sox last night while they were waiting for the Jake Peavy train that never game, 20-1. Twins DH Joe Mauer had 112 rushing yards and 2 touchdowns. Read the rest of this entry »

LaLa Vasquez was escorted away from courtside of Game 4 between the Nuggets and Mavericks after this altercation. This fun little slice of life comes on the heels of Mark Cuban apologizing after telling Kenyon Martin’s mother that her son was a thug. Which he is of course; he played for Bob Huggins at Thug Life State Cincinnati. His players used to do offseason conditioning by sprinting out of dormitories with stereo equipment under their arms. That one might take you a second.

Its too bad that the thug’s mom won’t see that apology on the internet. He should print it out and mail it to her on the first of next month. Yeah, I went there.

|vid from NBC DFW, via Maj|