Deion Sanders Tweeted this photo of his son, Deion Sanders Jr., in his dorm room, curled up in his Versace sheets. I believe that makes this the least surprising photo that the elder Sanders could have ever posted. I can only hope that Deion Jr. has an equal or greater talent for music than his father.
Deion Sanders and his second wife, Pilar, have had a very well-documented, nasty public battle going ever since they filed for divorce in September of last year. Pilar has accused Deion of being a narcissistic bully, among other things, claiming that the man who once called himself Primetime and wore more gold than Mr. T craved constant attention and demanded regular self-assurance, not only from his wife, but the multiple alleged mistresses that he had during their marriage.
Deion, on the other hand, has tried to maintain the image of a man who cares first and foremost about a stable family life and a sense of well-being for his three children with Pilar – Shilo, Shedeur and Shelomi – and apparently there’s no better way to support normalcy than having your kids fill out police reports and then post a picture of it on Twitter.
As you can see above, Deion and his kids filled out police reports against Pilar yesterday after she and a friend allegedly attacked Deion in his bedroom as the kids were watching TV. And because Twitter has always been known as a medium of truth and justice, Deion openly spoke of the assault to his Tweeps:
I guess each man is entitled to respond to his own divorce and, in this case, alleged domestic assault however he sees fit, so if Deion wants to broadcast his battles on Twitter, more power to him. I just love when Deion is in the news, because then I can share my favorite story about him – Carlton Fisk calling him a “piece of sh*t” – and probably the most unintentionally hilarious video of all-time…
Well, like nuts, at least.
Sports
Exciting New Genre Alert: The MMA Porno - It’s called “Fighters” and follows “two beautiful, passionate girls, from opposite walks of life that come together in a battle of lust and unyielding wills to fight it out in a stealthy boxing match.” Spoiler: One walk of life is “stripping” and the other is “molestation”. [Cage Potato]
Sports’ Best Mustaches - Sure, you always have to see that same picture of Rollie Fingers, but “best mustaches” lists on the Internet are the best place to find out about weird-looking hockey players. I keep wondering how hockey players get hot actress girlfriends. Theory: hockey is the one pro sport where a woman can date a white guy and not look like she’s a secret racist. [Yardbarker]
Real Madrid Signs 7-Year Old - Soccer is a fun game for children to play, I don’t know why people are so upset about this. Just make sure he drinks Pediasure instead of eating that box of fries. [Online Sports Guys]
Deion Sanders And The Career Many Forgot He Had - It started with “Must Be The Money” and ended with a Troy Aikman-looking Hall of Fame bust. That’s quite a career. Also, he was the sh*t in Tecmo Super Bowl. [Smoking Section]
With Leather
Senorita, Feel The Conga, Let Me See You Golf Like You Come From Colombia - Shakira golfing. If you see the title “Shakira golfing” and don’t at least look at it for a few minutes, you’re a weird person. [With Leather]
@Storytime: Celine Dion Destroys Ron Artest’s Fragile World - This thing needs more comments. This is a “Fabio gets hit in the face by a bird while riding a roller coaster” type of situation and needs your attention. SHE MADE HIM WANT TO LEARN ABOUT THE HOLOCAUST. [With Leather]
The 80′s Sitcom Daughters Guide to Fantasy Football Wide Receivers - I love that Burnsy puts so much work into making these intelligent and accurate and most of the comments are still just “meh where’s Lynn from ALF your argument is invalid”. [With Leather]
Melina Splits: WWE Cleaning House - Notable because WWE is referencing them on television, with the slight chance that Masters, Kozlov and Harry Smith are going to return as part of CM Punk’s “Legion Of The Damned”. Melina, of course, will be at Wizard World Austin. Come on, Wizard World Austin! [With Leather]
Not Sports
The Best of #Tom Haverford - For all your apps, zerts and chicky-chicky parm-parm needs. Tom is my girlfriend’s favorite character on Parks and Rec, no matter how hard I try to convince her that Leslie is the best person in the history of sitcom television. [UPROXX]
7 Sci-Fi Philosoraptors: Dinosaur Meme Tackles Time Travel, Space - Needs more “Carl Sagan explaining Flatland”. “Cosmos” ruled, I don’t know if you were aware. [Gamma Squad]
The Five Most Useless Action Movie Heroines - I clicked this to make sure Violet from Ultraviolet was on the list, and sure enough, there she was. I got that blu-ray free with my blu-ray player and could not believe something so free could be so terrible. It was like watching Joseph Kahn jack off onto a tablet. [UPROXX]
Black Dynamite: Watch the Full Pilot - Main man Black Dynamite! [Adult Swim]
Urban Meyer’s foxy volleyball daughter Nicki has lashed out at her own smart phone over talk that her famous father is headed to Columbus take over as head football coach at Ohio State. Nicki, who is pretty famous for platonically hugging Tim Tebow all the time, posted the following message on her Twitter.
That’s what I’m tlking abt. Rumors and conspiracy theories have been running rampant all month, and college football commentator and flatulence-free food advocate Beano Cook exasperated the speculation with a prediction of the move during an interview on ESPN radio on Thursday. Neon Deion Sanders, who is in that header picture for some reason, could not be reached for comment.
For more information about Nicki Meyer, you can check out her Twitter, her Georgia Tech volleyball bio, or you can just turn around and talk to Chris Hansen, who is standing like four feet behind you.
The people entering the NFL Hall of Fame this year were announced, and it’s not like there were any big surprises or controversies. Curtis Martin and Willie Roaf, along with a couple others, were expected to also make it this season but didn’t. Either way, no one will make a gigantic deal out of this like every single baseball writer ever.
Sanders and Marshall Faulk led a class of seven voted into the Pro Football Hall of Fame on Saturday. Joining them were Shannon Sharpe, Richard Dent, Ed Sabol, Les Richter and Chris Hanburger. -FOX Sports.
Does anyone appreciate the little conflict that arises when NFL players are chosen for the Hall of Fame? It seems to go by pretty easily with no people writing ranting columns on “character” and such, or maybe I’m just being selective. Feel free to correct me if I’m wrong, as I’m not some supercomputer football machine thing. Although, that would be pretty cool.
I’ll admit, I’m a little young to recognize the names of Dent, Richter, or Hanburger (who is a letter away from being a very delicious food), but I’ve definitely heard of the others, as they’ve made a much bigger dent in the minds of the average fan. Their contributions (especially Sabol’s with NFL Films and how it’s given football fans much more than they could have expected out of the game) will certainly be recognized with their additions to the Hall of Fame.
Also, like everyone else, I have to see Sharpe’s equine mug all over pre- and postgame shows on NFL Sundays. He makes Sarah Jessica Parker look mildly attractive, and that’s saying a lot.
Joe Theismann made an appearance on the NFL Network to discuss this weekend’s Patroits-Jets matchup, and had an unfortunate slip of the tongue involving Danny Woodhead and a pretty obvious double entendre. Now, I’m a big fan of double entendres, and this one is moderately funny, but Deion Sanders’ reaction is really unwarranted.
This would be a great time for me to go a rant about professionalism in journalism, but that would be unnecessary and really boring to read. I will, however, slap on a pair of surgical gloves and prescribe Deion a 20mg daily dose of Lobster Dog for his sense of humor deficiency. On second thought, I’d rather not hear him laugh at all. His laughter sounds like a cat having an abortion. Video after the jump.
