I’m sure there’s plenty of NFL news and notes to update today, but the majority of games were on Saturday and you’ve probably seen Jerome Simpson landing a flip into the end zone 600 times by now (if you haven’t, it’s here). What you may not have seen nearly enough of are NFL cheerleaders dressed in all of their best holiday attire during the NFL’s Week 15 and 16 action. And I know that most of them are dressed like Santa Claus to honor Christmas, but I say holiday attire because the Indianapolis Colts cheerleaders wore blue and white so they could technically be giving the NFL’s Jewish fans some bigger candles this Hanukkah season.

Among the teams to feature their festive females were the Dallas Cowboys, Philadelphia Eagles, Tennessee Titans, Baltimore Ravens, Tampa Bay Buccaneers, Colts, Buffalo Bills, Oakland Raiders, among others. And even the Los Angeles Clippers’ dancers got in on the action, as if to say, “Merry Christmas, NBA fans who stayed up late to watch the newest media bandwagon darling lay a complete thrashing on the Golden State Warriors.” Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays, indeed, friends of With Leather.

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What you need to know:

Golf cart mows down everyone in sight after a high school football game in Cowboys Stadium on December 17, 2011

What to look out for:

- A golf cart coming to life and trying to murder you a la Maximum Overdrive.

- 0:17-0:22 – A guy getting knocked ass over head and losing both of his shoes in the process.

- 0:20-0:26 – A guy getting knocked onto the cart, but being able to do nothing but helplessly touch the wheel for a few seconds before bailing out and rolling like the cart is about to explode or go sailing off the edge of a cliff.

- 0:19-0:29 – The only person in Texas fast enough and possessing enough mental prowess under pressure to sprint after a golf cart, climb into it and put his foot on the brake.

- 0:32-1:29 – Representatives of Texas high school football selling being bumped by a golf cart like they’ve been shot by a sniper.

- 0:00-0:16 – Is Trey Williams a real person, because he looks like a created guy in Madden.

[via Buzzfeed]

"Think somebody will write a really sh*tty rap song about this?"

By icing his own kicker in the 4th quarter on what should have been an easy game-winning field goal, Dallas Cowboys head coach Jason Garrett basically took the door off the hinges and invited parody into his life. Of course the kick that Garrett iced was good, and Dan Bailey eventually missed his second effort, leading to a game-winning touchdown by the Arizona Cardinals in overtime. Now, I would make the point that Garrett deserves ridicule for not using his powerful running game properly against a terrible defense, and others will point out that Tony Romo completely blew an opportunity to use one of the team’s two timeouts, but in the end the kick is all people will talk about.

Take Cowboy Jeff, for instance, who has quite a history of parodying embarrassing moments in Cowboys history. He decided that Garrett icing his own kicker was indeed deserving of one of his patented parody songs. This one is entitled, “Don’t Ice Ice Bailey.” Brace yourself.

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Good morning from Arlington, Texas, home of the Dallas Cowboys and Texas Rangers, neither of whom I am here to see. I’m updating today’s Morning Links from a Days Inn, and let me tell you, this is the best hotel room 60 dollars can buy. Did somebody say “exposed light bulbs”?

Links

EveryTweet_Ever Is Aptly Named, Hilarious - Link title is aptly named. Girl On Vacation is especially biting, even if I’m a sucker for pictures like that. [UPROXX]

The Five Grinchiest Comics About Christmas - The One Best Comic About Christmas: that Michaelangelo Ninja Turtles one-shot. [Gamma Squad]

Video: The Top 50 Moments Of The NBA Lockout Games - Now you too can be a basketball hipster, refusing to watch the NBA’s shortened season because Kobe dunking on Jewish guys was so much purer. [Smoking Section]

Jean-Ralphio: The Greatest Thing to Happen to Romance Since Color Me Badd - The only character I like more than Jean-Ralphio is Lil’ Sebastian. Oh who am I kidding, I love every character on that show. [Warming Glow]

Full trailer for Tim & Eric movie: Robert Loggia cuts off a lady’s finger - I don’t know who watched Tim & Eric and thought “hey, this will work for 90 minutes straight”, but more power to them. As long as Steve Brule shows up. [Film Drunk]

Kelly Brook Has A New Calendar And It’s Totally Sports Related - A think we did featuring 12-ish pictures of the biggest and best 32-ish year old breasts in England. Revisit it. [With Leather]

The 45 Most Powerful Images Of 2011 - This list became invalid when “Lady Gaga as human motorcycle” was not included. Just kidding, this is awesome. [Buzzfeed]

Sexy portrait of Queen Victoria painted in 1843 kept Prince Albert busy in the can - I’m not sure why “sexy portrait of Queen Victoria” is something that’d get me to click a link, but Jesus, here we are. [FARK]

Are Movie Titles Too Literal? - Yes. [Moviefone]

Tis the Season for Gingerbread AT-ATs - See what you’ve done, prequels? This would’ve been the coolest thing in history in 1993. [Unreality]

How Drunk You Can Get At Your Office Holiday Party - If your first thought was “I don’t know, let’s find out”, you are awesome. [BroBible]

Jeff Goldblum in a field with a butterfly on his finger - I’m going to convince myself this is an example of Chaos Theory. [The High Definite]

If you’re any type of respectable male – or awesome female – you probably spent your Thanksgiving with a face full of gravy as you shoveled turkey into your yapper while watching 3 more-or-less entertaining NFL games. If that’s the case, you might remember Miami Dolphins linebacker Marvin Mitchell tackling Dallas Cowboys tight end Jason Witten way out of bounds, while somehow not drawing a personal foul penalty. You should remember it because it involved Cowboys cheerleader Melissa Kellerman being tackled and helped up by Witten in quite a gentlemanly display.

Kellerman laughed it off and the cameras followed her smiling shock for a few moments before getting back to yet another Miami choke job. But because of those few seconds, a star was born and people suddenly wanted to know more about Kellerman, and she later took to her Twitter to joke about the whole gigantic man crushing her 100-pound frame ordeal.

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“Hello, YouTube.”

In our continuing effort to share with you the brightest and most athletic moments of the NFL week, here’s a clip of Philadelphia Eagles center Jason Kelce accidentally slam dunking a football into his taint because he forgot where Michael Vick was standing. It’s like watching a chicken birth an egg in high-speed reverse. He just crams it in there and starts running off like a frat pledge with a pickle up his ass.

Vick recovered the ball (possibly because nobody else wanting to touch it), and to his credit it was his heads-up reaction to the mis-snap that helped maintain possession of the ball and keep Philadelphia’s eventual 34-7 victory looking like a blowout.

Also blown out: Jason Kelce’s o-ring.

[h/t Shutdown Corner]