If I had to rank professional sports fans in terms of craziness, I wouldn’t even think twice:

1) NBA fans
2) Everyone else

While NFL fans are certainly insane in their own rights and passionate about their teams, NBA fans have multiple layers of crazy that can be peeled back to reveal a molten core of manic lunacy that is the universe’s greatest natural source of irrational behavior. I think this is because the NBA, unlike the NFL and MLB, is a star-centric league, in that fans focus on the best players above the actual teams. People love LeBron James no matter what team he plays for, and they’ll go absolutely apesh*t if you try to tell them that’s wrong.

Additionally, the NBA has more frontrunner fans than the other pro sports leagues because the same teams always win. When those teams don’t win, those fans get even crazier, because they’re supposed to always win. But when they do win, these NBA fans become even crazier because they don’t understand how anyone can possibly hate their Lakers or Heat. How can you hate them? You have no reason. You’re just a hater. YOU’RE A HATER, DAMN IT!

Well, good news, you crazy ass fans. You can now anonymously submit your craziest thoughts and questions to “NBA Confessions” so you don’t have to deal with us haters and sane people who just don’t get you and your undying love for Kobe Bryant. Much like the Tim Tebow Confessions site that we’ve previously examined, the submissions are a delightful blend of standard inquiries and batsh*t insanity.

As always, I’ve included some of my favorites after the jump.

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We’ve entered Day 46 of the NHL lockout and there still seems to be no end in sight. The big news today is that if a deal can’t be reached within the coming hours, the 2013 Winter Classic will be canceled and that sucks, because that’s probably the only non-playoff game I watch during the regular season (go Blues, big fan). That cancellation would be in addition to the 326 regular season games that have already been nixed, but there is apparently a silver lining.

While I’m no sports labor expert, I wouldn’t get my hopes up. UPDATE: It was just canceled. The majority of analysis I’ve read over the past several days makes it seem as if the sky has already fallen, someone picked it up and used Scotch Tape to hold it in place, and then it fell again, this time killing some children and puppies.

But as usual, I started my morning routine by searching the webs and Tumblrs and Tweeters for humorous fan reactions and anything meme-worthy, and I came across two NHL bro pals who are handling the lockout in a rather amusing fashion, via text message anger management.

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Okay, Oklahoma City Thunder fans, step back from the lighter fluid. Seriously, you’re acting a little foolish. Look, as a fan of a team that just traded its star player away, I certainly understand that you’re pretty broken up over the Thunder trading away Kevin Durant yesterday. Wait no, not Durant. My bad, I meant Russell Westbrook. Wait, no. It wasn’t Westbrook either. It was James Harden, the team’s 6th man. But hey, he does have a pretty sweet beard.

In case you were too focused on your fantasy football teams yesterday, the Thunder traded free-agent-to-be James Harden (and some other dudes) to the Houston Rockets for Kevin Martin, Jeremy Lamb and picks. According to the above picture that someone emailed me of Harden shirseys being torched, OKC fans are apparently mad at Harden for not accepting the Thunder’s reported offer of 4 years, $55 million. Instead, Harden opted to seek a max deal (5 years, $80 million) with another team. Oh, and there’s another teeny weenie little itsy bitsy reason that Harden wanted out.

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In a moment so full of passion for the NBA that I can only assume it was stolen from a David Stern wet dream, Tracy McGrady recently landed in China, where he will play for the Qingdao Eagles of the Chinese Basketball Association, as he is the next in the distinguished line of former NBA players to finish his career in the Far East. Despite a career hindered by injuries, T-mac has always been an NBA fan favorite for his “what could have been” highlight reel.

But don’t feel bad for the guy, he already has quite the following in his new country, and that was proven in the aforementioned video, which shows him being greeted at the airport by a mob of Chinese basketball fans, chanting, “T-Mac! T-Mac! T-Mac!” And you can tell that he’s in full-on “Bros, I just got off an airplane full of farts and baby screams” mode but they don’t care. They love them some T-Mac in China.

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Last night, while trying to sort through political arguments among people I follow on Twitter so I could focus on what the social media site was actually intended for – porn stars lobbying for people to vote for their Fleshlight – I noticed a Tweet from Yahoo!’s Jay Busbee about a woman who informed him about the new ink of Dale Earnhardt that she just got, as you can see in the banner image. It’s actually a little unclear, so I’ll let Jay explain it.

Screw the debate, you MUST see this tattoo on @lisa88fan of Dale Sr. looking down the stairway to heaven on Dale Jr.

That’s right, that is a full back tattoo that depicts a stairway to Heaven with Dale Earnhardt, Jr. looking up at his father, who is surrounded by either clouds or angels. Either way, that’s a pretty immense show of loyalty to one specific NASCAR brand. But then, I wouldn’t expect anything else from a woman who has “Nascar Girl” tattooed on her shoulder blade, as well as a butterfly and the moon on the other side.

Oh, and it doesn’t end there, friends. This woman also has an Earnhardt tattoo on her leg that she shared on her Twitter account.

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The Washington Redskins are currently 1-0 after a huge 40-32 Week 1 victory over the New Orleans Saints, and naturally the buzz of that win revolved around how great rookie quarterback Robert Griffin III played. RG3, as he’s known in science fiction films to fans, threw for 320 yards and 2 TDs in his first regular season NFL game, so naturally Skins fans are excited about his future. It also helps that he gets to play the St. Louis Rams this week, and everyone assumes that’ll be a much easier game for him (even though the Rams made Matt Stafford look like he played for the Rams).

Again, the guy has played one regular season game, and while I know that Skins fans are relieved that they finally have a potentially good QB and not a Grossman or Campbell, we shouldn’t anoint him the Chosen One just yet. But that would be a rational point of view, and sports fans are never rational. That’s how a meme like Griffining is born.

Coined by The Burgundy Blog, Griffining is the new planking/owling/Batmaning/Tebowing, and I have a feeling that even if the Redskins go 1-15 this season and Griffin throws no more TDs and 50 interceptions, the fans will keep doing it, because sports fans are insane. While there’s already a movement to stop this fad growing on Twitter, it won’t matter. The resistance to Griffining is futile.

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