In the best jetpack-related disaster to happen on Fox since George Michael battled a giant mole and accidentally destroyed Sudden Hill, Fox 5 Reporter Matt Johnson tries to tape an intro with a cool aeronaut and almost gets dumped in the drink by the grinning moron and his wacky flying machine. Two observations:

1. Jetpacks still need a little work, and
2. Fox 5 should probably start a little later

I’ve watched this about ten times, and I think what makes it funny is how helplessly the guy tumbles into the water. Like, he doesn’t take off and then crash, he just steps off the platform and drowns. You don’t get to see what happens, but I hope the jetpack kicked in just as he went underwater and he got shot straight down to the bottom. And then he stays under too long and everyone gets concerned, but then he FLIES UP out of the water and up into the sky yelling WOO HOOOOOOO.

I watch too many superhero movies.

[h/t The Daily What]

Danica Patrick made her NASCAR debut yesterday in Daytona, and things didn’t go as well as she’d hoped.  Not only did she not win, she didn’t even finish.  She tried to work her way out of a 12-car orgy and ended up crashing herself.

Patrick finished sixth in last week’s ARCA event at Daytona, and felt comfortable enough to move her NASCAR debut up a week to the Nationwide opener. The IndyCar star went into Saturday’s start saying her main goals were finishing the race, staying out of trouble and learning as much as she can.–Fox Sports

Danica spent much of the race outside the top 20 and then the top 30, but to be fair, someone has to be last so it may as well be her.  Both Dale Earnhardt Jr. and the race’s winner Tony Stewart came to Patrick’s defense, citing the uniqueness of the Daytona event in general and the fact that she didn’t crap out sooner as reasons she’s legit.

“We’ll go to these other tracks where she’ll literally be driving the car, it’ll be handling good or bad,” Earnhardt said. “Then people can start forming their opinions on what kind of learning curve she has. But I feel pretty confident. She’s been in a tough situation with the media and the pressure and the attention, I couldn’t have done it.”–Fox Sports

All of the hype is certainly good for business.  There are plenty of sadists in this world that will tune in just to see if she fails.  However, she’s hot, young trim behind a powerful machine in a man’s sport–if she starts winning she’s going to be like a unicorn.  As long as she never lets herself go, anyway.  Then she’d be completely useless.