You may want to sit down for this news, because it will blow your mind, but apparently Kobe Bryant is trying to get laid again. And at the 2012 Summer Olympics of all places. I mean, the Olympics should be a sacred gathering of the world’s greatest athletes and showcase their talents and determination. But I guess things are bound to get a little screwy – pun originally not intended, but what the hell – when you have companies like Durex practically begging athletes to throw on a raincoat and get down.

As for Bryant, he’s now being called out by Australian women’s hoopster Liz Cambage and Australian swimmer Craig Stevens for trying to get down with Australia’s three-time gold medalist swimmer Stephanie Rice. Cambage Tweeted that Bryant was being a little too friendly with the ladies during these games and pointed out that it might not make his wife, Vanessa, very happy, but she later denied that she was referring to Rice. Stevens, though, just flat out called them on their freaky deaky.

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Back in October, 31-year old Elisa Sampson was still celebrating her year as the 2010 World Gravy Wrestling Champion with a booze party at her apartment, when she found her best friend, Sabina English, having sex with a guy on her couch. Sampson wasn’t too thrilled about that and tried to stop it, so English responded by hitting her in the face with a giant wrench.

Why would English get so upset over her friend stopping her from having sex? I’m guessing she doesn’t get the opportunity very often.

The fight occurred last October, a year after blonde Elisa won the 2010 World Gravy Wrestling Championship, in which she wrestled other women and men in 2,000 litres of Bisto outside a pub near her home in Rossendale.

Miss Martine Snowden, prosecuting, said Elisa, English and Paul Greenwood who were all friends, were at the wrestler’s flat enjoying a drinks party.

Trouble began when Elisa Sampson went into her living room and found English and Paul Greenwood having sex.

Miss Snowden said: ‘Elisa was cross with what she saw, unhappy about their behaviour in her lounge and asked: “What are you doing?”

‘But English jumped up and Paul Greenwood got up and grabbed the victim around the throat and pushed her into the doorway.’

English’s brother who was also at the flat punched Elisa in the face a number of times. (Via the Daily Mail)

English and Co. were recently sentenced to jail time for their parts in the beating – the results of which you can see after the jump, if you’re not too squeamish – but the wrench-swinging best friend got the bulk of the punishment with 2 years in the clink. As for Sampson, I can only hope that the gravy-wrestling circuit isn’t all about the looks.

So I guess the moral of the story is do not ever cockblock someone in England or they will hit you in the face with a wrench.

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