Hey Cleveland, get ready for another excuse for why you never win anything: Browns running back Peyton Hillis is the face of Madden NFL 12. Hillis was announced Wednesday as the winner of the ESPN.com fan vote, garnering 66 percent of the vote in the final against Philadelphia Eagles quarterback Michael Vick. When asked what he thought about getting the cover, Hillis seemed to forget how words work, saying he was “excited” and that he’s “always looked up to” Michael Vick. Which is, you know, sort of weird.

Regarding that whole “curse” thing:

“For people to believe in this so-called curse, I can’t wait to prove people wrong,” he said. “From what I believe and where I am in my spiritual life, it would be good to prove them wrong in that sense.”

Fun observation of the day: Peyton Hillis thinks the Madden Curse has something to do with spirituality. Put Deepak Chopra on the cover of Madden 13, he’ll prove them wrong!

EA avoids an inevitable controversy by pulling Hillis on the cover, and pleases the grass roots types who supported him through Facebook and Twitter campaigns, pushing him through over higher seeds like Aaron Rodgers and Matt Ryan. It makes sense for the no-nonsense, smash-mouth Hillis to be on the cover of a football game, as Michael Vick’s time in Philadelphia performing for remorseless, groaning monsters and experience murdering dogs makes him a better fit for Resident Evil 6.

The Cleveland Browns might be the only NFL team rooting for no football in 2011. Not only is Cleveland Browns football harmful to children and impairing to your ability to operate heavy machinery, theirs is an organization bereft of the commodity we refer to as “playmakers,” guys that can make 10 yards out of a 5-yard pass, beat double-team blocks and defy the limitations of mere mortals. Au contraire, says newly-anointed head coach Pat Schurmur.

“I think Ben Watson is a playmaker. I do think we have guys who can make plays,” Shurmur said via the Canton Repository.

–via PFT.

To clarify, Ben Watson is not a playmaker. Ben Watson is, however, the best player on a very bad team.

I seriously would want to see the Cleveland Browns play a season in the CFL, just to see how a crappy NFL team would play against established Canadian teams with inferior talent, but with more familiarity with CFL rules. How would the Browns do? Would they break .500? Twould depend on the number of plays made from Mr. Watson. Which is to say, they’d be totally screwed.

LeBron James recently told ESPN that the NBA could benefit from teams having more superstars, a la his partnership with Dwyane Wade and that other guy on the Miami Heat. James used Minnesota’s Kevin Love and New Jersey’s Devin Harris and Brook Lopez as examples of players that he believes would be more exciting on better teams. And that’s fine, because the whole world agrees that their teams suck. But James is upset now that people think he’s pro-contraction, when he never even used the word. Hell, he doesn’t even know what it means…

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It’s funny, you see, because sometimes when someone is doing something particularly well, especially in sports, people will often refer to that person as being “on fire.” But in Ravens safety Ed Reed’s case, he was both figuratively and literally on fire during Baltimore’s 20-10 romp of the Cleveland Browns. Now, try and keep up here: Reed secured his fifth and sixth interceptions of the season yesterday in the win that stamped the Ravens’ ticket to a third consecutive postseason appearance, so he was “on fire” in that regard, but he was also literally on fire after his jacket partially ignited when Reed plunked down too close to a sideline heater. The comic genius of it all is in its subtlety, obviously.

Reed was unharmed in the smoky incident due to the quick thinking of some teammates who alerted him to his smoldering status. That’s teamwork right there, kids.

“I think you’ve got your hook for your story,” Head Coach John Harbaugh said. “Ed was on fire. He really was on fire. He just played so well. He’s such a factor back there, run game and pass game.”

Reed, who warned Harbaugh not to get too close to the sideline heaters before his own episode, had another lesson to impart before leaving Cleveland.

“You’ve got to be smart trying to stay warm,” he said with a laugh. “[I was] too warm.” [via]

Huh. Even Coach Harbaugh saw the “on fire” angle. Perhaps my astute comic acumen isn’t as finely honed as I have led myself to believe. Sigh.

Video follows.

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Fun Times In Cleveland Again…We enjoyed this correspondence from a Cleveland Browns season ticket holder–and the team’s terse reply that was posted on Deadspin yesterday. We’ve shared both letters on the following pages, and if you haven’t already seen them, they’re worth the click-throughs. They’re surely better than anything the Browns have done on the field this season.

SITE NEWS: We’ll have another post a few more posts later this afternoon and then we’ll be in vacation mode, with Power Rankings and Weekend Picks tomorrow. Enjoy your holiday weekend and thanks for reading.

One Cleveland news outlet is reporting that Browns coach Eric Mangini will be fired at the end of the regular season, which would make him the fourth NFL head coach of the year to lose his job while everyone wondered how he got one in the first place.

Sabrina Parr from WKNR is reporting today that regardless of what Mangini does in his last three games, he is out as head coach. Chris Fedor then added that the Browns are having difficulty finding a new offensive coordinator because there is a lack of willingness in candidates to work with Mangini.

–Waiting For Next Year.

Really? Who wouldn’t like to work with suck? Between this guy, Wade Phillips and Brad Childress, it’s a wonder that unemployment is so high and yet these dudes–who any average fan could have told you was a bad hire–are still holding down jobs. I’ll add Chan Gailey and Jack Del Rio to the list as well. If either of those guys have any sense, they’ve already cleaned out their offices and put a moratorium on buying green bananas. They’re an investment, see.