Pete Rose has engaged in a variety of acts which have stained the game, and he must now live with the consequences of those acts. He’s started admitting his mistakes, but I’m not sure he’s got a handle on the whole “living with the consequences” part. In a story that can only exist in a world where a peaceful God enjoys reading The Dugout, eternally-banned baseball hit king Pete Rose wants back into the game, and he’s going in head first like … uh, himself.

“I want to be a manager, that’s the only role,” Rose told the crowd at Ohio Justice and Policy Center gala. “But I’m running out of time. I want to teach young players.”

Rose announced his intentions to the attendees of the Ohio Justice and Policy Center gala, who last time I checked are not in charge of any baseball teams. It’s sort of like Brett Favre showing up at a local high school, zipping up his Wranglers and mentioning that he wants to be the commissioner of football and own a large horse.

“I don’t go to many banquets where I sit with the judge that sent me to prison,” the hit king and keynote speaker said, drawing laughter from the 300 people in attendance. “I’m not bitter at anybody. I made the mistake.”

He then added, “C’mon, Paulie, roll a dice. Take a chance!”

Personally I think Pete should be in the Hall of Fame and that what he did wrong barely matters in the grand scheme of spousal stabbings and drunk drivings in modern sports, but sorry, Pete, the only guy who could take back the whole “you’re banned forever from everything, deal with it” died before you started owning up.

Connor Echols plays Little League baseball for the 14U Cincy Flames. He jumped on Twitter and invited Cincinnati Reds second baseman Brandon Phillips to come watch his team play.

This is normally where celebrity Twitter interaction stories end. I’ve “talked” to Kanye West and Hulk Hogan, but the best thing I’ve gotten back is a “ha ha!” response from Kate Beaton. Well, Connor’s story didn’t end here, because Phillips took him up on the offer, commented on the overaggressive crazy people you find at a Little League game and took pictures with everybody. Now Connor has a story he can tell people for the rest of his life, and even his math teacher is talking to him about his Twitter.

It’s nice to know that sometimes people are cool, you know? We take it for granted, writing about these guys all the time like they’re our co-workers. I talk about Jim Thome like I know him. But it’s just reassuring to know that heroes once existed for a good reason, even if they’re just normal people who don’t really do anything special.

[via Hotclicks]

Pensacola, Florida, is set to host a brand new Double-A Affiliate of The Cincinnati Reds in 2012. Pensacola Professional Baseball (who are making a huge mistake) has selected the top six finalists for the club’s Name the Team contest, and fans are voting for their favorite through May 14. Some of the choices are what you’d expect from the Minor Leagues, like the Redbones (symbolizing the “dog days of summer” and “doggone fun,” respectively), the Aviators, the Salty Dogs and the Loggerheads.

Unfortunately one of the choices is especially cute, and we may end up with another Butthead Memorial Auditorium on our hands.

Mullets

- Mullets are one of Pensacola’s most popular fish, as well as a fun, wacky team name Minor League Baseball is known for. Mullets stand for the fun, off-the-wall entertainment fans can expect at Maritime Park next season and beyond.

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Jeez, Pete. What’s up with that jacket. Did you lose a bet? Via.

If you’re going to sing about the demise of a rival player, take a lesson from Cincinnati Reds slugger Jonny Gomes, and make sure there aren’t any press nearby.

Gomes walked into the Cincinnati Reds spring training clubhouse early Wednesday morning singing at the top of his warbly voice.

The melody was not recognizable, but the words were plaintive: “Wainwright’s gone, Wainwright’s gone, Wainwright’s gone,” he sang joyously.

The reference was to St. Louis Cardinals starting pitcher Adam Wainwright, sent back to St. Louis Tuesday to have his ouchy elbow examined.

The word on Wainwright is that he might need Tommy John surgery, which would spell big trouble for the Cardinals’ chances of catching the Reds, who won the NL central last fall. That’s a good break for the Reds, but they’re gonna catch hell for this.

What was Gomes supposed to do? Aw, I really wish that St. Louis still had their best starting pitcher healthy so they could beat us in a few crucial games that might wind up knocking us out of the playoffs. Ask any jerkoff hippy sportswriter out there who doesn’t compete for his daily bread and he’ll tell you yes. As a Reds fan, I find it ridiculous to celebrate anything in February. Except Mardi Gras. Because, you know, boobs.

Barry Larkin is heading to the monolith.

ESPN reportedly has lured the MLB Network analyst to Bristol for its coverage of the upcoming 2011 baseball season. The move has not been confirmed by either network, and it’s unclear what role the former Reds shortstop would play for his new employer.

I’d say that this is good news for those who currently don’t have MLB Network coming into their TVs and weren’t able to enjoy gems of Larkin’s analysis, like this video of how infielders will call for pitches, and sometimes unintentionally tip them to the opposition. But it’s not, because at ESPN, things like raising your voice and looking into a player’s eyes actually counts for analysis, and while their reporters are often given leeway to be great at their jobs, their analysts are not. Over there, it’s more like, “Oh, A-Rod! Red Sox! Derpy derpy derp!” It’s funny because that’s how they actually talk over there.