"You're mad? I have his fumbles on my fantasy team!"

For millions of years or as long as men have gathered in groups to draft fantasy football teams, the running back has been the dominant selection. If you don’t share the philosophy then you’re at least familiar with the strategy of taking two running backs first to create a solid scoring foundation. The top overall draft picks are almost always elite RBs, and you most likely spend the majority of the football season sending out terrible trade offers with the hopes of acquiring another RB.

Essentially, RBs have almost always ruled the world. Too bad the jerkface coaches of the NFL are doing their best to destroy that philosophy, what with the ever-increasing trend of committees and scenarios. But does that mean that you can’t use a little strategy to make sure that you acquire an elite RB on draft day? Yes, actually, it does mean that. Unless you have a top 5 pick this year (depending on how your league rewards and favors QBs) you’re probably not going to get top tier production from your backfield.

But that doesn’t mean that you can’t at least have solid productivity while creating harmonious scoring across your roster. You just have to clear your mind, forget your fan allegiances, and for once in your life stop telling yourself that THIS is the season that Joseph Addai becomes a monster. Again, I will remind you that I am not professing to be a fantasy football expert, like the many people at the big boy sites who don’t know their asses from a hole opened by the Green Bay Packers offensive line. But I do have some opinions that could help you, and chances are they’re at least better than your moron friends who spend $10 on magazines each year.

Today’s topic is the running back, as we fight to protect the endangered species that is the featured back. And yes, I’m using more attractive females to make my arguments.

Tennessee Titans running back Chris Johnson got a visit from the Orlando Police Department on Tuesday. The reasons for that visit are conflicting; the police say they saw an unusual amount of television cameras at his house, so they investigated to make sure nobody was dealing drugs. Johnson says it was because he’s young, black and famous. No word on whether or not Johnson had money hanging out the anus.

The report, from his Twitter:

Y did the police just walk in my condo saying they think it’s drug activity because it’s alot of traffic but it was the MTV camera crew. … Hard being young, black, and rich

Read the rest of this entry »

Yeah, yeah, we still have two games tonight, but we’re on a schedule and if I don’t get this up now, some of you will actually start working, and we can’t have that.

• Redskins 13, Cowboys 7. Tony Romo led a masterful drive at the end of this game that would have given the Cowboys the win, but a hold called on Cowboys tackle Alex Barron nullified Romo’s touchdown pass to Roy Williams. Penalty accepted. Game over. It’s funny, because usually the only thing needed to nullify Roy Williams is Roy Williams. And the gold pants were…something.
• Packers 27, Eagles 20. Michael Vick got the call after Eagles quarterback Kevin Kolb was knocked out of the game with a concussion. Vick amassed 278 yards of total offense and a TD pass, good enough for some media members in Philly to wonder if it’ll soon be back to the rape stand for Kolb. Andy Reid said no, and then clapped humorously while balancing a beach ball on his nose.
• Texans 34, Colts 24. Your grandfather just ordered an ARIAN NATION T-shirt that’s already a size to small (and it’ll shrink even more in the wash!) Texans running back Arian Foster ran for 231 yards and 3 TDs. And then he probably went home and took a nap, because that sounds like a lot of work. So if you were playing against Arian Foster in fantasy this week, sorry bro.
• Steelers 15, Falcons 9 (OT). Steelers running back Rashard Mendenhall ran for 120 yards and a TD, much of which came on his game-winning 50-yard run in the extra frame. And you (yes you!) can still lose the coin toss in OT and win the game if your defense just gets a GD stop already.
• Seahawks 31, Niners 6. Pete Carroll is 1-0 in his return as an NFL head coach. Matt Hasselbeck threw for two touchdown passes, one of which he was asked to return to the NCAA.
• Titans 38, Raiders 13. Another big day for Chris Johnson: 142 rushing yards, 2 TDs.

Here are the rest. If your team didn’t make the list, kindly ask them to do something more impressive next week. Hey, we’re running a business here. We can’t just give love out to everyone.

This meeting between country music star Faith Hill and Tennessee Titans running back Chris Johnson reminds me of one of those internet dating commercials, only this refuses to end. They wind up going to some cafeteria-style restaurant, which always makes for a good impression. Nothing says “I just renegotiated my contract” like a box of chocolate milk with two straws in it.

I do particularly enjoy Hill’s attempts to beat a conversation out of the guy. “So what do you eat before a game?” “When did you get your teeth capped?” “Do you wash your hair with root beer and daschund pee? It has so much body to it!” C’mon Chris. She’s been waiting all day for Sunday night. Give her something. Read the rest of this entry »

One of the biggest stories in football this summer was the contract disputes between Chris Johnson and the Tennessee Titants. Well, if you couldn’t tell by my use of the past tense, or this post’s headline, the Titans and Chris have come to an understanding. The specifics of the 2,000 yard rusher’s newly worked deal have yet to be announced, but Johnson will be getting paid more money this coming season. It’s a good thing too, those rims are expensive.

Chris Johnson has officially received the pay raise he was looking for.

The contract will pay Johnson more money this season by accelerating some escalators that he had unlocked for future seasons.

So Johnson will arrive at Titans practices next week a happy camper. And he’ll still that way — at least until next offseason. –PFT

Good news for Chris, the Titans, and people lucky enough to get the number one pick in their fantasy draft. Hopefully, Johnson will find ways to stay in the news now that his contract disputes are over. That man gives one hell of an interview. Read the rest of this entry »

He has his mother's eyes

Titans running back and noted gold tooth enthusiast Chris Johnson has recently run away from police voiced complaints to Titans management about his contract. The reigning NFL Offensive POY is set to make 550K next season, a condition of his rookie contract. Johnson, who rushed for over 2,000 yards last season, has threatened to hold out of his contract; a move that has been supported by former NFL stars including Warren Sapp, Eddie George, and Marshall Faulk.

“Chris has outplayed his rookie deal. He has beyond exceeded the expectation where he was drafted,” Faulk said. “When you are drafted you are paid as to where you were drafted, not to how you play. And then after you play and prove your worth you are then paid as to how you play. He has exceeded the money he is making, the Titans know it and everyone in the league knows it.” –profotballtalk.com

Johnson’s rookie contract pays him 12 million dollars over 5 seasons. Considering NFL superstar colossal bust JaMarcus Russell made 68 million over 6 seasons, with 31.5 million guaranteed, Johnson’s dominating performance last season makes him deserving of a better deal. He has said that he wants to be the highest-paid offensive player in the league, money he could spend to buy more grills and pimped out cars.

A very convincing case for Chris Johnson’s payday after the jump. Read the rest of this entry »