New Fighting Illini Coach Tim Beckman Sings At Wrigley, Breaks The Sound Barrier

Written by Brandon Stroud / 07.30.12

Coach Beckman Take Me Out To The BallgameLadies and gentlemen, we’ve got a new entry in the Worst Rendition Of ‘Take Me Out To The Ballgame’ competition.

For some people, singing ‘Take Me Out To The Ballgame’ at Wrigley Field is a dream come true. Hell, it’s on my bucket list and I don’t even like the Cubs. For some, it’s a Mitt-Romney-Goes-To-Jerusalem-esque PR move … case in point, this clip of new University of Illinois head football coach Tim Beckman ingratiating himself to the locals with a rendition so enthusiastic you can forgive its badness. When it doubt, clench your fists and throw your arms in the air like Freddie Mercury. And hey, to his credit he spent the last three years in Toledo, a city so unimportant it has yet to get music.

For the record, if I ever get to sing during the seventh inning stretch at Wrigley, I’m taking voice lessons for six months and doing the entire thing like Mariah Carey.

[h/t to Dr. Saturday]

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How Dare The Chicago Cubs Dress Up As Super Heroes After Losing

Written by Ashley Burns / 07.23.12

Despite being absolutely mauled in a three-game sweep at the hands of their villainous arch-rivals, the St. Louis Cardinals – this is how I assume every article in the Midwest began last night and this morning, by the way – the Chicago Cubs left Busch Stadium with their heads high and a positive attitude. In fact, the whole team decided to dress up in zany costumes, as has been a “hilarious” trend throughout the league this season and seasons past.

As you can see above, some of the Cubbies honored their favorite super heroes, while others dressed as video game and movie characters. And even after the 23-1 ass-stompery, which included a 7th inning for the ages in Game 2 on Saturday, the Cubs stood by their promise to dress up and have some fun.

“I have to do it,’’ Alfonso Soriano said of the commitment to put on his costume after a 7-0 loss. “I don’t want to do it now, but everybody else is doing it, so I think I have to do it.’’

Though some other staff and players also seemed reluctant, nearly everyone complied with the event, which had been planned, and once postponed, since spring training, including Ryan “Captain America” Dempster, Anthony “Buzz Lightyear” Rizzo, Carlos “Zorro” Marmol and manager Dale “Hellboy” Sveum. (Via the Chicago Sun-Times)

Of course, their fun couldn’t be dampened solely by the fact that they lost 3 straight games, instead some of the Cubs also had to be reminded that they were dressing up as Batman characters only a few days after the Aurora, CO shooting. If that wasn’t completely bad enough – and short of a reporter running over Ryan Dempster’s dog – the Sun-Times also reminded everyone that this weekend was a celebration of Ron Santo’s life for Cubs fans, and he absolutely loathed costume days.

All in all, I’d say the Cubs probably feel like complete crap today. But at least they’re having fun.

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Zach Galifianakis And Will Ferrell Take The Chicago Cubs To Pleasure Town

Written by Brandon Stroud / 07.20.12

Will Ferrell Zach Galifianakis Chicago Cubs first pitch line-ups

In the tradition of Will Ferrell announcing that Carlos Boozer still lives with his mother, the Chicago Cubs brought in Ferrell and The Campaign co-star Zach Galifianakis into Wrigley this week to throw out the first pitch, read the game’s line-up cards and just generally f**k around on the field until they were told to leave.

Highlights include Ferrell having pizza delivered to the mound so he could have dinner with Ryan Dempster, and exchanges like this:

Galifianakis: “Batting sixth and playing catcher, in his spare time he’s an accountant at a styrofoam cooler company, No. 18 Giovanni Soto.”

Ferrell: “Batting seventh and playing second base, he likes to take long walks on the beach … completely naked, No. 15 Darwin Barney.”

We’ve got the important video clips below, including the one where Will stands up at the dinner table and yells at Steve Clevenger for forty minutes about how he drives a Dodge Stratus.

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Did Jay Cutler Have The Worst Rendition Of ‘Take Me Out To The Ballgame’ Of All-Time?

Written by Ashley Burns / 07.16.12

"Buy me some Smirnoff Ice and Armani slacks, I don't care if I *mumble mumble*, bro."

Forgive me for that headline, as hyperbole usually isn’t in my wheelhouse, but holy Harry Caray, Chicago Bears quarterback Jay Cutler did a number on the classic Wrigley Field 7th inning stretch on Saturday. Our beloved J-Cutty was on hand at the Friendly Confines to throw out the first pitch and sing “Take me Out to the Ballgame” and it was just plain bad.

Cutler also spent the bottom half of the 7th inning in the booth with Bob Brenly and Len Kasper, and the entire package was just one epic disaster of awkwardness. Ultimately, it’s what I expected from the socially reluctant Cutler, who never seems like he wants to be anywhere. Hell, I thought the cherry on top was when he returned to his seat without the Cubs jersey that he was visibly struggling to button up as he entered the booth.

But hey, not everyone has to be a Cubs fan to appreciate tradition. However, would it be too much of me to ask these celebrities and Cubs fans to simply learn the lyrics to a short song that people have been singing for more than 100 years? I don’t think so. And to answer my own question, no. Cutler wasn’t the worst. Perhaps he was the most uninspired or uninterested, but there have been many far worse. And I have them to punish us all.

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Elect Bill Murray To Every Sports Hall Of Fame

Written by Brandon Stroud / 06.20.12

Grant Brisbee over at Baseball Nation shared Bill Murray’s speech from his induction into the South Atlantic League Hall of Fame, and I want to share it here for two reasons:

1. Bill Murray is the coolest guy in the entire world and should be inducted into everybody’s Hall Of Fame, if only for the speeches.
2. It needs to get remixed with clips of Max Fischer sitting in the crowd, taking notes.

The secret, apparently, is to find something you love to do and then do it for the rest of your life. For me, that’s listening to my favorite actor talk about baseball. Bill Murray Hall Of Fame speeches are my Rushmore.

Full video is below (thanks again, SBN Studios).

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This Week In Original Etsy Sports Merchandise

Written by Ashley Burns / 06.15.12

In what has quickly become my favorite With Leather-inspired hobby yet – not counting dumpster diving outside Kate Upton’s apartment – I tried to broaden the horizon of TWiOESM by including a little bit of everything. Originally, I wanted to make this all about the Los Angeles Kings winning the Stanley Cup and the Miami Heat and Oklahoma City Thunder battling for the O’Brien Trophy, but that’s not fair to the rest of you that need pictures of WWF wrestlers printed on dictionary pages.

Speaking of, I received my Ultimate Warrior dictionary pages in the mail this week and they are pretty much the coolest thing I’ve ever spent $5 on. Needless to say, I’ve got my eyes on a few new things this week, starting with one of my all-time favorites – Legos.

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