With NFL free agency set to begin tomorrow, a lot of people believe that a handful of teams qualify for this equation:

Mediocre to average 2011 season + Peyton Manning coming off 4th neck surgery = ZOMG SUPER BOWL!!!1!

Among those teams have been the Denver Broncos, Arizona Cardinals, Seattle Seahawks, New York Jets, Washington Redskins, Tennessee Titans, San Francisco 49ers, Houston Texans, Philadelphia Eagles and Miami Dolphins. And what we know from an outlandish barrage of rumors and reports over the last 5 days is that only the Broncos and Cardinals really have a shot, because Manning hasn’t met with any other teams and he doesn’t want to. (Update: He’ll meet with Tennessee after all. Double Update: This is why the dead period before free agency sucks, because people can just report anything. Manning will meet with the Dolphins.)

That includes the Dolphins, but only because Manning claimed he’s familiar enough with their facilities that he doesn’t need a meeting. And while I think that’s a death rattle for Miami’s chances, that hasn’t stopped Miami’s fans from making one last-ditch, musical effort to sway Manning’s opinion.

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He looks photoshopped in, doesn’t he?

Metta World Peace née Ron Artest took off to Nevada over the weekend to host a night at the Chateau Nightclub & Gardens at the Paris Hotel on the Las Vegas Strip, and like a lot of Vegas tourists he decided to take in a show. That show happened to be Celine, Celine Dion’s residency performance at The Colosseum at Caesars Palace. Most people who go to that will tweet “went to see Celina Dion in Vegas, liked the show” or “went to see Celina Dion in Vegas, did not like the show” (that one would be me), but not Artest. Here’s the Spark Notes version of what went down:

1. Ron Artest is Ron Artest
2. Ron Artest decides to go see Celine Dion in concert
3. Celine Dion changes Ron Artest’s life
4. Ron Artest gets frustrated that his Twitter followers don’t know who Celine Dion is and think he’s joking
5. Ron Artest has an existential crisis, considers the idea that he might be dumb and is driven to improve himself
6. Ron Artest gets in over his head

The last two days of @RonArtest are succinctly chronicled here for your observation and amusement, and because somebody needed to make a permanent record of this. Please click through to enjoy.

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