*takes off glasses, wipes single tear from cheek*

It is with a very heavy heart that I report that yesterday, at the age of 26 years and 8 months, Pusuke the Shiba Inu passed away at his home in Japan. Early reports indicate that Pusuke died from natural causes – adorable, furry natural causes. Last December, Pusuke became not only a legend in his own country, but also the world, when he was named the World’s Oldest Dog by the Guinness Book of World Records.

Pusuke is the ninth oldest dog in recorded history, as the oldest dog ever was a 29-year old Australian cattle dog named Bluey. But Pusuke almost didn’t even make it to accept his title last year, as he had been hit by a car and nearly killed only weeks before. You can take Pusuke’s balls, but you can’t take his balls.

As for his final moments…

Pusuke refused to eat and also had difficulty breathing, before peacefully passing away in the afternoon. Ms. Shinohara arrived home just five minutes before Pusuke died, after she was out running errands.

Shinohara, 42, said: “I think (Pusuke) waited for me to come home.

“I was with Pusuke for 26 years and I felt as if he was my child. I thank him for living so long with me.”

(Via Digital Journal)

The great Jack Donaghy once said, “For God’s sake, if we can put an ear on a mouse’s back, we can certainly make a peacock immortal.” I like to think that goes for dogs, too.

Steve Jobs, one of the most important people in our modern world, has died. It’s hard to do a tribute to him at With Leather, because a “The Sports World Reacts To The Death Of Steve Jobs” thing would just be LeBron James going “@justinbieber Steve Jobs dead please RT”, but he deserves a network full of obituaries, and here are a few from the UPROXX family. You died like you lived, Steve: smarter than everyone else, and never changing clothes.

Steve Jobs Is Dead At 56 - I’m glad he lived more than twice as long as Jack Noseworthy. [UPROXX]

R.I.P. Steve Jobs - Warming Glow’s tribute, featuring his 2005 Stanford commencement address and a sick burn on Zunes. [Warming Glow]

Obits: Former Apple CEO Steve Jobs - A word from TSS. [The Smoking Section]

The World Reacts To The News Of Steve Jobs’ Death - This features that amazing Tweet from the Westboro Baptist Church about how they’re gonna picked Steve’s funeral, posted using the Church lady’s iPhone. Great stuff. [Gamma Squad]

And now, some stuff to get this off your mind.

Links

ESPN’s NSFW-ish Body Issue: Naked Gymnastics And Awkward Nude Dunking - You might’ve seen this yesterday, but click it again, because I updated it yesterday afternoon with naked Hope Solo video. It’s something you should see, possibly twice. [With Leather]

Kirsten Dunst: “I couldn’t have done Antichrist because my boobs are too big.” - Having seen two key scenes in Melancholia, I support this. I also would’ve accepted “I couldn’t have done Antichrist because I didn’t want the Green Goblin to actually put his dick in me”. [Film Drunk]

The Last Words Of 20 People Who Were Executed - I want my last words before execution to be “boom, roasted”. [Buzzfeed]

When Did Kelly Osbourne Get Sorta Hot? - She didn’t. She’s going backwards, and was sorta hot a few years ago when she was chubby and Sheamus-white and trying to be a goth pop star. [FARK]

25 Things You May Not Know About ‘Breakfast at Tiffany’s’ - #26: The older you get, the more you get bothered by MISS-A GO-RIGHTRY, I MUSSA PLOTESSSSSST. [Moviefone]

Church of Mary Doesn’t Really Get ‘House’ Quotes - This is like a comedy club putting up posters of “Scrubs”. Come on, pay attention! [The Daily What]

The 16 Hottest ‘Bare Necessities’ Lingerie Models - Baloo had better be in here somewhere. [Brobible]

The Ten Best Horror Movies You Haven’t Seen - Also great but not on this list, Behind the Mask: The Rise of Leslie Vernon. It’s the first movie I ever watched with my girlfriend, and has the “les incompetent” girl from Home Alone in it. [Unreality]

The original fitness guru Jack LaLanne passed away yesterday. He was 96.

LaLanne died of respiratory failure due to pneumonia Sunday afternoon at his home in Morro Bay on California’s central coast, his longtime agent Rick Hersh said.
…
His last blog entry, dated Jan. 20, 2011, had these words: “Hope you all are keeping your New Year’s Resolutions to taking care of the most important person on this earth, YOU!!!!” -CBSNews.

As with every celebrity death, Twitter was buzzing with the passing of LaLanne, making some good (and surprisingly tasteful) jokes about the man. Reading about what LaLanne did to promote fitness during his lifetime, such as doing over a thousand pushups in 23 minutes or handcuffing himself to a boat and pulling it through the water, it makes me feel incredibly lazy since I’m sitting at my computer not doing any of that, but I’m still in awe at what he was capable of (the full list of feats is here). Chances are if your grandmother was in the same state as LaLanne, he probably tapped that.

I’m going to end the post with a video which is better than a ton of motivational speeches I’ve heard. What I love about it is that LaLanne’s method was never yelling at people to become more in shape, but telling them that if they wanted to be in shape, it was possible and he would help them. Also, his juicer’s pretty sweet. It’s capable of juicing anything!

Photo via.