Mathematical!

This week, Sports On TV covers the greatest sports moments of the best cartoon on television, Cartoon Network’s ‘Adventure Time.’ If you aren’t familiar with the show, it follows the various quests and activities of a human boy and his dog as they live and fight monsters in the Land of Ooo, a post-apocalyptic Earth full of candy people, inter-dimensional vampire demons, anus-obsessed ghosts and every D&D joke imaginable. It’s a show you either love from the moment you give it a shot, or spend the rest of your life side-eying. Hopefully you’re in the first group.

Be sure to check out the moments and the other Sports On TV columns after the jump, and don’t miss the Peppermint Butler commenting badge we’re giving you for sharing our list around and dropping a comment. Do that, and you’re tops blooby.

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File this under: News that was buried because it didn’t involve love triangles with Katy Perry and Kim Kardashian or bromances with Jeremy Lin. Last week, I pointed out that a surprising amount of athletes attended the second annual Cartoon Network Hall of Game Awards, from host Shaquille O’Neal to New York Giants hero Victor “We Get It Already, You Salsa” Cruz, and somewhere in between was last year’s flavor, Denver Broncos quarterback Tim Tebow. On hand to accept the Captain Clutch award, which I assume he later texted a picture of to Matt Prater, Tebow was actually doing something much cooler by attending.

He was treating 10-year old Colorado cancer patient Presli Collins to her very first date.

Of the invite from Tebow, which was received through his foundation Wish 15, Lisa Collins said, “She’s just gone through a lot, and when we got the notice for this, she was just completely shocked.” She went onto say that Tebow “treated Presli like a princess, made her feel like she was the star, which was just amazing.”

At the end of the event, Tebow told Presli, “Thank you for being an amazing date.” (Via Fox News Insider)

I don’t know if I just didn’t notice that little tidbit at the time (possibly) or if it was just grossly under-reported (probably), but that’s a pretty awesome move by Tebow. In a time when YouTube date requests have just gotten out of hand – my demand still stands, Emma Stone! – it’s nice to see Tebow pick one that’s hugely admirable. And don’t think I’m the only one who noticed, because singer Taylor Swift was reportedly showing her appreciation of Tebow at an Oscar party Friday night.

Sources say Tebow and Swift were “quite flirty” but I heard they went all the way. That’s right… he touched her elbow. No word yet on when Swift will release her double album, “Touchdowns & Heartbreaks”, celebrating her six day romance with the man of her dreams and how he ended up just another Gyllenhaal in her nightmares.

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"First the Cartoon Network Awards, then a Nobel Prize!"

Last summer, while both the NFL and NBA were locked out, I questioned why more athletes weren’t attending the Teen Choice Awards to try and gain a little favor from the public. Seriously, the athlete attendance was limited to Shaun White and 3 puppies from Air Bud’s litter, while half the NBA sat at home picking fights on Twitter. Well it turns out that the answer was pretty simple – make the whole thing about athletes and they’ll attend.

This was proven Saturday night when the Cartoon Network honored our favorite athletes at the second annual Hall of Game Awards, which is not to be confused with Spike’s F*CKIN’ ATHLETES, BRO! SLUTS! Awards, which are held on Vin Diesel’s birthday each year. Shaquille O’Neal played host for the Hall of Game Awards, and he was joined by dozens of child actors that I’ve never heard of. But plenty of athletes showed up to have their egos stroked.

You can wait and watch the whole show tonight (especially if you’re a fan of Flo Rida and who isn’t?) but I’ve got some photos after the jump. Shockingly, they did not name Jeremy Lin their new overlord.

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