It’s a pretty standard feature, the collection of the worst national anthem performances of all-time, and most sports and pop culture blogs usually start running them out around Super Bowl time, unless there’s a surprise craptacular performance at an all-star game, NASCAR race, or drunken 4th of July party. But they’re just all so damned classic that we love re-living them every time.

That’s why I can’t believe that it took someone this long to finally put together a spectacular mash-up of the worst anthem performances in history. This new mash-up, brilliantly assembled by the fine folks at Popdust, has everything, like a Tosh.0 special episode – Roseanne, Carl Lewis, Christina Aguilera, the spectacular R. Kelly performance that is almost always excluded, and thank Francis Scott Key, they even included Fergie’s vocal disaster from last week’s Miami Dolphins game against the New England Patriots.

It is the perfect storm of patriotic suck and we salute it.

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It’s been a rough week for America, what with that stuff that we won’t talk about right now (Duke losing, of course) and it always helps to have something inspirational fall into our laps. And while my greatest inspiration, Rachel Bilson, has yet to fall into my lap, we were lucky enough to stumble across this video of 8-year old Elizabeth Hughes performing the National Anthem at a Norfolk Admirals hockey game on January 7.

As Elizabeth was nailing it – just crushing that Star Spangled Banner – her mic cut out, leaving her tiny-yet-powerful voice without the benefit of amplification. That’s when the crowd collectively shouted, “To heck with your faulty sound system! To heck, we say!” and they lifted Elizabeth up with their voices and gave a giant middle finger to this country’s enemies.

Strap a cassette player to your leg and fly a jet into your heart, video after the jump…

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