And now, to cleanse your palate, here are 12 links about Peyton Manning.

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Links

News Anchor Drops F-Bomb When She Hears That Peyton Manning Will Sign with Broncos - Not as funny as the eventual follow-up, “Tim Tebow drops f-bomb in church when he hears God has forsaken him”. [Brobible]

Careful What You Tebow For - When I Tebow, I like to Tebow for world peace. [Kissing Suzy Kolber]

Video: Tyler Honeycutt Baptizes Michael Beasley - I’m guessing this also has something to do with Tebow? [Smoking Section]

Best of Mechanical Bull Fails - I love that HuffPo thinks “not successful riding the mechanical bull until the end” is a “fail”. He slowly slid off! LOL! [HuffPost Comedy]

Everything These Drunken Dumbass Brothers Needed to Know About MMA They Learned From a Chuck Liddell Highlight - Advice: do not attempt to recreate anything you’ve ever seen in your own backyard. [Cage Potato]

Michael Bay says new TMNT will be “edgy, lovable, aliens” - Michael Bay’s only interpretation of science-fiction is “aliens”. He should remake the Twilight Zone and have ever ending just be “aliens”. [Film Drunk]

Our 30 Favorite Wondercon Cosplay Photos So Far - Every year they should retire one costume from cosplay rotation. This year it should be The Joker. Actually, that should’ve been every year for the past 20 years. [Gamma Squad]

Sofia Vergara Is the Deserved Cover Girl for the Sex Issue - At least in a still photo you can’t hear her yell “JYAYYYYYYY, JYAYYYYYYYY”. [Warming Glow]

The Best Of #Roger Sterling - “Being in blackface once, getting robbed once and emotionally harassing Joan all the time” memed onto a picture of him having a heart attack. [UPROXX]

UPROXX @ SXSW: A House For Lions, Youngblood Hawke And The Workaholics House Party - Or, “how I spent my Friday afternoon”. A very tight butthole gallery. In fact, the only loose butthole aspect of the day was the complete lack of Jillian. [UPROXX]

This Liquor Store Has The Best Signs - Finally, someone’s taken the concept of funny church signs and applied it to the secular world. [Buzzfeed]

Every Itchy & Scratchy From The Simpsons - 48 minutes of your time well spent, especially when it gets to the Poochie parts in the middle. [NextRound]

5 British Shows That Will Please the “Downton-Abbey” Loving Old Lady Within You - I was hoping “Oh Do Behave!” was on the list somewhere. [Pajiba]

This past Sunday, the Built Ford Tough Bullriding Series kicked off at Madison Square Garden, as Cody Nance won the first of 29 events that will culminate with a championship in Las Vegas later this year. Nance’s fourth career victory bested Valdiron de Oliveira, who is the series’ defending champion. And I just assume that you’re skimming this information and wondering, “So what the hell does this have to do with Kate Upton?” because powerful forces brought all of us creepy bastards together here for a reason.

Last Friday, Upton was a special guest for the 6th annual Champions of Professional Bull Riding Madison Square Garden Invitational Pre Party, along with New York Giants tight ends Jake Ballard and Bear Pascoe. Upton, who could probably earn billions charging people to watch her ride a mechanical bull, was on hand to do what she does best – stand next to trophies and look wonderful.

More importantly, she also spent some time with children from the Garden of Dreams Foundation, which hosts special events with New York sports teams and celebrities to “make dreams come true” for kids dealing with a variety of hardships. And it makes me a little happier to know that those kids share my dream of one day meeting Upton, too.

In the meantime, I’ll have to settle for photoshops of picture No. 6.

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