Here’s Ellis Lankster, the 7th round pick in last April’s draft for the Bills, and other athletes wish they had the same command of the podium that he does. Just let the eloquence wash over you like a shower of broken glass. I counted 16 “Like, um” iterations, which should leave the stewards of the internet plenty of ammo for any upcoming remix. I’m keeping my fingers crossed. Via. Thanks, Greg.
What the hell is going on here? I went down to the pier for a Barq’s and a beej and suddenly there’s another offensive coordinator without a job. How was the pier? Well, the root beer was pretty good…
“We have removed Turk Schonert and relieved him of his responsibilities as offensive coordinator,” [Buffalo Bills] head coach Dick Jauron told a news conference.
“It’s nothing we had planned on and was nothing enjoyable in any way, shape or form.”
The Buffalo first team had failed to score an offensive touchdown in five pre-season games. via.
We hadn’t planned on firing arguably the second-most important member of our coaching staff 10 days before the season starts. Good to know. The thing is that now that firing coaches has become so trendy, there’ll be a rush of preseason firings as we head into the NFL opener on Thursday night. Oh, I can’t wait to see who gets fired before the deadline [**crosses fingers hoping Dallas OC Jason Garrett gets canned**]. Ah, football is back.
Two of the more fascinating plays in the Hall of Fame Game last night involved Tennessee-Titan-in-Houston-Oiler-clothing punter AJ Trapasso, who took a safety to end the game and give Tennessee a useless 21-18 win over the Buffalo Bills. But the best play of the night had to be Trapasso’s fake punt/fake punt fake/run on the Titans’ opening drive, which he took 40 yards for the game’s first touchdown. No wonder LenDale White lost all that weight in the offseason. Having a white punter taking your roster spot can’t be good for street cred.
| Tosh.0 | Thurs, 10pm / 9c | |||
| Terrell Owens Apologizes | ||||
|
|
||||
I only bring that up because our new friend Joselyn over at Tosh.0 sent us this yet-to-be-aired mock presser featuring Terrell Owens apologizing for the ills of the world. And yeah, it’s kinda cute, and certainly an above-average TV performance for an athlete. But being a dick for seven years and then actually half-acknowledging it on a comedy show does not sympathy make. But if Kobe Bryant did a bit getting fresh with one of those inflatable dolls in front of a ski chalet backdrop, I might have to reconsider that stance. But not before.
The Buffalo Bills running back who allegedly masturbated in front of the window of a 59-year-old woman passed a polygraph test. Pro Football Talk was told yesterday by the agent of fullback Corey McIntyre that McIntyre passed a polygraph test, reaffirming his innocence. Ah, to be innocent again…
“We had to wait for the results of a polygraph test which Corey submitted to and passed before we could say anything further regarding these outrageous and harmful allegations…”
“When Corey was arrested he was simply riding his bike on the same route he did every day as part of his normal workout routine. Once the accuser’s description didn’t add up and the police told him he was clear, an officer even called the Bills to let them know they had the wrong guy.
McIntyre remains free on a $10k bond. Free to not masturbate in front of any more old women.
Owens seems to spawn forgiveness wherever he goes. Here’s the often-embattled wide receiver getting…I can’t believe this…getting the key to the city of Buffalo. It blows my mind how Owens can make any fan, team, or city look like a battered housewife. This time will be different! If I just love him a little more…. Let’s see what Bills fans will be giving Owens in Week 12 this fall.
|You Been Blinded, with rather apt video comparison|
