Have you ever wanted to see Billy Beane lure players into romantic situations using a Brad Pitt mask? Have you ever wanted to see Hiroyuki Nakajima battle Yu Darvish in a samurai versus cowboy fight? If you answered yes to either of those questions and/or want to feel like you’re on drugs, here’s the latest from Taiwan’s Next Media Animation. (via NMA World Edition)

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Links

Donate Some Of Your Time And Help Us Raise $10K For Charity, Won’t You? |UPROXX|

The Game Of Thrones Beer Bottle Looks Unbelievably Bad Ass |Warming Glow|

McBride, Rogen, and Franco vs. the apocalypse in ‘This is the End’ |Film Drunk|

Happy Holidays From The LadyCats, The Best Thing About The Charlotte Bobcats |With Leather|

It’s A Terrifying Life: Three Reasons The Christmas Classic Is Actually A Horror Movie |Gamma Squad|

Watch As A Senior Citizen Choir Takes On Hip-Hop |Smoking Section|

Chiefs Cookies Accurately Simulate Chiefs Fandom |Kissing Suzy Kolber|

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Mike Tyson has told the story about the time he caught his then-wife Robin Givens with then-nobody actor Brad Pitt before. The story originally involved Tyson showing up to Givens’ house right after she’d served him with divorce papers, and he wanted a little nookie for the time being. Unfortunately, she wasn’t home, and as he was leaving, Givens pulled up to her house with Pitt and everyone was like, “Awkward!” I also assume that Pitt peed a little.

But now, as Tyson explained in a recent interview with Yahoo!’s Graham Bensinger, the event went down just a tad bit differently than he originally told it. It turns out, according to Tyson, that he actually caught Givens and Pitt in the act of what the romantics call – doing it.

“I was getting a divorce. I was going to my lawyer’s office to divorce her that day but I wanted to sneak in a quickie. This particular day, someone beat me to the punch. I guess Brad got there earlier than I did. I was mad as hell. You should’ve saw his face when he saw me.”

I like to think Pitt’s face looked a little like this…

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When I was in Las Vegas last weekend, all the cab drivers and table dealers wanted to talk about when it came to shows was how excited everyone was for Mike Tyson to begin his highly-anticipated one man show, “Undisputed Truth – Live on Stage.” Of course I completely understood their excitement and I was somewhat depressed that it hadn’t started yet, because I can only imagine the hilarity that will come with Tyson telling old stories for an hour or two on stage.

With the show beginning this month on the seemingly appropriate Friday the 13th at the MGM Grand Hollywood Theatre, Tyson is making the late night rounds for some promotional obligations, and one of the best stops he could make was at Conan, because TBS’s desperation cable network status allows a little wiggle room for language and good taste.

Tyson didn’t disappoint with a story about how he was totally cock-blocked by Brad Pitt while the heavyweight champ was still trying to get with Robin Givens, even after their incredibly rocky and well-publicized divorce.

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He’s won the Heisman Trophy, two BCS National Championships and had his pants sell for $5,000 on eBay, but now Denver Broncos sorta-quarterback Tim Tebow is winning the awards that really matter … like the fifth annual Zillow Celebrity Neighbor Survey. Yes, that is a thing. It “asks Americans which celebrities they would most like to have as their neighbor, as well as celebs with whom they wouldn’t dare share a fence” and Tebow is on top. The Jersey Shore people are on the bottom, as usual.

From People, with a hat tip to Sportress Of Blogitude:

U.S. adults would most like to be neighbors with Denver Broncos quarterback Tim Tebow, whose unshakable attitude and consistent displays of faith during games (a.k.a. “Tebowing”) has bolstered much media attention during the last year. The survey showed the 24-year-old athlete’s popularity was significantly higher among males (14 percent) compared to females (7 percent).

Celebrity super couples Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston and Justin Theroux received 10 percent and 9 percent of the vote, respectively.

He’s a kindhearted gentleman and you get an endless supply of footballs lost in your yard!

Also, how funny is it that Justin Theroux is considered one-half of a “celebrity super couple”? I get that he’s dating a lady who was on ‘Friends’, but damn, being Leslie Knope’s worst boyfriend for four episodes and playing a cowboy in Romy and Michele’s High School Reunion don’t make you an A-lister. I agree with most of the rest of the list (including Nancy Grace ranking on both lists, because whatever, people are stupid in both directions), but I would love to have Lindsay Lohan as a neighbor. She’s never home, and when she IS there’s a chance she’ll be naked and falling all over me. Also, it would mean I’m rich enough to live in Lindsay Lohan’s neighborhood.

Links

Steve-O Breaks His Nose On Mike Tyson’s Fist - Any time I get confused about why people are so weird and confrontational about vegans, I remember that Steve-O AND Mike Tyson are vegan. Thanks for giving the haters a good reason, guys. [FARK]

David D.’s 25 Favorite Wrestling Matches Of All Time - If I’d known this could be an UPROXX feature I would’ve been doing one a day since I got hired. Totally doing a follow-up to this on Monday, if I can figure out how to get rid of all the Chris Benoit matches. [Smoking Section]

Eight Chapters in the Origin Story of Brad Pitt - Movieball is in theaters today, were you aware? [Moviefone]

The UPROXX Guide To Television’s 20 Most Lethal Show Killers - Summer Glau didn’t kill “Firefly”, Nathan Fillion’s accent did. It’s why I didn’t watch the show until earlier this year. Buffy season 7 was that bad. (p.s. Firefly is f**king great) [UPROXX]

Graphic Designer Dad Gives His Daughter An Ewok Adventure - Mean Girls-style Cool Moms are the worst, but This-style Cool Dads are the best. [Gamma Squad]

ABC to Make Nicholas Sparks Romance Porn - I’m glad they at least waited until Peter Falk was dead to make a sh*tty TV adaptation of Wings Of Desire. Can’t wait for werewolves to show up. [Warming Glow]

Abduction is getting Bucky Larson’d - In a better world, “Bucky Larson” will continue to be a verb describing a unanimous hatred of something. [Film Drunk]

The 10 Definitive Ron Swanson GIFs - I can’t tell you how happy I am that this show is back on TV. And why did Rob Lowe decide to grow his hair like mine? My hair looks terrible. [UPROXX]

18 Products Just As “Offensive” As Schweddy Balls Ice Cream - I haven’t clicked this yet, but I hope “Nut-N-Honey” made the list. [Buzzfeed]

Katie Holmes is the Slutty Pumpkin on ‘How I Met Your Mother’ - Does anything ever actually happen on this show? In my mind it’s just people walking onto bar or living room sets repeatedly while a studio audience laughs. [AOL TV]

Great Cast! Terrible Movie! 10 Awful Movies Despite the Awesome Talent Involved - Slackers, I’m looking in your direction. A movie with Max from Rushmore, Jason Segel, Big Pete from Pete and Pete and a James King/Laura Prepon lesbian kiss and somehow it’s still the biggest piece of sh*t I’ve ever seen. [Pajiba]

With Moneyball set to hit theaters tomorrow, Sony Pictures has the PR and marketing armada in full force, with the exclamation point being Brad Pitt on the cover of Sports Illustrated this week. “Moneyball,” of course, is an excellent book by Michael Lewis that tells the true story of Oakland Athletics GM Billy Beane and his (sort of) revolutionary sabermetrics system. Moneyball the movie, though, is a fictitious take on the book that stars Pitt as Beane and Jonah Hill as a character based on former A’s assistant GM Paul DePodesta, who didn’t want his name in the movie.

I share similar opinions about this film with our comrade at WWTDD, but baseball movies are still like sex with a pizza to me – it’s never bad. Either way, I was pretty disappointed with the cast of Moneyball, in that there are no current or former MLB players playing themselves. But then one listing caught my attention:

Royce Clayton as Miguel Tejada

That’s right, former MLB shortstop for 11 teams, Royce Clayton is making his acting debut as Miguel Tejada. I pray that he just has one line and he walks into the clubhouse and in a terrible accent asks if anyone has seen his vitamins. Runner-up for best casting choice goes to actor Gary “G. Thang” Johnson as Jermaine Dye. I’m strongly considering changing my nickname to B. Thang.

Also making the rounds for Moneyball is Hill, who was in Oakland yesterday to throw out the first pitch for the Athletics against the Detroit Tigers. Hill is on a first pitch parade, having tossed out the opener at the Chicago White Sox game last Wednesday as well. But Hill’s first effort came more than a year ago, when he threw out the first pitch at a Boston Red Sox game. I thought we might take a look at how his game has progressed.

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