This weekend, Saturday Night Live continued its trend of being the best 90-minute show that you can watch in 20 minutes on your DVR, thanks in part to Will Forte’s song making fun of the BCS. Even though every Will Forte song on Weekend Update sounds exactly the same, and even though this devolves into easy George Bush jokes, I still found this mildly enjoyable enough to post. What a ringing endorsement! Ain’t no compliment like an underhanded compliment!
Also excited: Jesus
Florida beat Oklahoma 24-14 in the BCS Championship Game last night, cementing its status as the best non-undefeated team in the nation, which equates to a national championship this year. Sorry, Utah. Try not being in Utah, you’ll get some more respect.
Maybe I’m the only one who doesn’t care that the Sooners’ streak of 60-point games stopped, but I actually enjoyed seeing an evenly matched game with defensive stops and a couple turnovers (the Gators’ two goal-line stands were the difference in the game). The only problem I had with the game was the announcers, Thom Brennaman and Charles Davis. Here’s a sample of the commentary:
Brennaman: …and Tim Tebow is just putting this team on his back. What an amazing leader!
Davis: I’m even more impressed by the person he is, Thom.
Brennaman: And such a considerate lover.
I couldn’t stand it, and I like Tebow. I can’t imagine what it must have been like for Oklahoma fans. Their malformed, shrunken brains must have been so angry! More photos, links, video, and commentator screw-ups after the jump.
Try to imagine what you could do to make sure no one attended or watched a bowl game. Pick two small-conference schools, like Tulsa and Ball State? Check. Play the game in Mobile, Alabma? Check. Make the game a blowout? Check. Play the game in a driving rainstorm? All aboard for the Empty Stadium Express!
I’ve wasted half my damn morning looking for photos of the empty stadium, and it’s like the game didn’t even happen (Awful Announcing found the one you see here). No pictures from Getty Images. Nothing from Yahoo. ESPN.com: nothing on the front page, and nothing on the college football page. And ESPN showed the game! In fact, if you type “GMAC Bowl Tulsa Ball State” into Google, it will actually give you a return that says, “Did you mean ANYTHING ELSE? ANYTHING ELSE IN THE ENTIRE WORLD? WHAT THE HELL WOULD YOU WANT TO KNOW ABOUT THAT FOR?”
I hate everything related to last night’s GMAC Bowl, and I hate everyone responsible for its existence. I hate its placement between the Fiesta Bowl and the BCS Championship, I hate ESPN for showing it on TV, and I hate you if you disagree.
Starey Sheriff can’t stop staringSorry for the second straight post about the Fiesta Bowl, but I had to share some fun pictures from the game and its beautiful aftermath. McCoy! McConaughey! Spikey shoulders! Sweater vests! Broken-hearted Buckeyes! What more could you want out of a photo gallery? Oh, right. Boobs. Well, stick around. I’m sure there will be some later. Right now this is what’s giving me a boner.
Ohio State led Texas 21-17 with less than a minute to go in the Fiesta Bowl, and I thought to myself, “Wow, the Buckeyes are actually going to win a BCS bowl game. Too bad. It would be way funnier if they lost.” Then the Longhorns converted a 4th and 3 with about 45 seconds left, and Colt McCoy hit Quan Cosby (QUAAAANNNN!!!) for a 22-yard touchdown with 16 seconds remaining to give Texas a 24-21 victory, leading Longhorns fans to make rock ‘n roll devil’s horns and sing “I’ve Been Workin’ on the Railroad.”
Let me tell you, few things on television are as richly satisfying as the crowd shots of Ohio State fans that followed. The heartbreak was so plainly obvious. Buckeye fans really thought Charlie Brown was gonna kick the football this time. You just don’t get to see shattered faith every day. More like once a year. Right at the beginning of January. When Ohio State plays a big game.
Oh, excuse me — not just “Ohio State.” THE Ohio State Unibombombombomwoooooooooooo.
UPDATE: Video below (HT: AA). Gotta love that OSU safety “coverage” with the game on the line. Read the rest of this entry »
Before we get into discussing the NFL playoffs, it’s kind of worth noting what happened on Friday night: a college football team completed a perfect 13-0 season by dominating a highly regarded SEC team that had been undefeated until the SEC championship. Not too many people gave Utah an outside shot of knocking off Alabama, but the Utes controlled every facet of the Sugar Bowl in a 31-17 win.
In fact, Every Day Should Be Saturday has generously awarded Utah one-quarter of the national title:
Utah beat 5 ranked teams and embarrassed the SEC West champion. They did not lose a game this season. They had a defense that dealt out harm to all they faced and boasted one of the more accurate quarterbacks in the nation. They beat people with spread-option tactics executed with wishbone brutality. If you want more from a team, you’re either unreasonable, a total flaming asshole, or both.
So can we shove something up the BCS’s ass and get a college playoff yet, or what?
