WOMEN STILL HATE FUN

09.19.08 Written by Matt

Last month, we took a look at Wives Against Fantasy Sports, the collection of humorless control freaks who called themselves “widows” because they had lost their husbands to that hot little skank called fantasy football.

A site called MomLogic has finally caught wind of WAFS — apparently, they’re not avid readers of With Leather — and while their take has a better sense of reality, they still have complaints:

• “Fantasy sports players are basically Dungeons and Dragons dorks, only dressed like jocks. When my husband is trying to ‘work a trade,’ he concentrates incredibly hard. In fact, I’m sure he thinks he’s qualified to manage a real-life team now! Although it can be really annoying, I actually think it’s kind of funny.”

• “There are times when my guy actually prefers to check his stats than have sex. Several times, I’ve had to pry him away from the computer to get some attention. And when one sports season ends, another one begins. It’s non-stop.”

Ugh.  That last thing is probably the worst thing about being in a relationship.  Women.  Always wanting attention and trying to have sex with me.  Leave me alone, harpy!  I’m trying to figure out if Aaron Rodgers for Plaxico Burress is a beneficial trade!

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IN CASE YOU FORGOT, WOMEN HATE FUN

08.19.08 Written by Christmas Ape

If you haven't held it already, you're probably in the throes of preparation for you upcoming fantasy draft. I have Peyton Manning in my keeper league and his undetermined status is ruining my life. This devotion, of course, takes a toll on those extraneous social interactions called relationships. Naturally, women, the people who make relationships tedious, are upset because fantasy sports keeps guys less than 100 percent slavishly devoted to them. They even started a half-assed web campaign to carp about it.

WomenAgainstFantasySports, or WAFS, was started by a woman with a dream.  A dream that, as promised in the wedding vows she shared with her husband, would involve the daily joys of spending time with her best friend, her confidant, her love.  Alas, the advent of fantasy sports has crushed her hopes and desires, thereby making her a widow 2 months out of each year.  In coping, she has found refuge in the world wide web – a place where she can share her griefs, her pains, and her story with other widows.  (Thanks for providing the platform, Mr. Gore).

WAFS is dedicated to making sure that all women who suffer from the ill affects of reckless, addicted fantasy sports playing have a place to gather and share their stories, and read the stories of others. In addition, women can break the history of enabling their addict by taking a stand and letting the world know that they won’t take it anymore, perhaps by buying a shirt or two to strengthen their loyalty to those who seek the fall of fantasy sports.  Also, it’s a great place for fantasy-addicted men to begin their 12 step program  by admitting their addiction and selecting from our store to begin winning their spouse back.

That sounds like a great excuse to sell T-shirts organization! Shame, though. It's only a matter of time until this guy files suit against them. You see that, ladies!? We have a crusader on our side. I can't wait to get my share of that "making dudes hear about your day" class action suit he's got in the works.

[Lion in Oil]

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