Hold your heads high, previous record holders from Australia.

Last year, we brought you the brave news of 357 Australian women who gathered to raise awareness for the lack of women wearing bikinis on a beach one day while they also broke the Guinness World Record for the longest bikini parade. Earlier this year, 450 braver American women gathered in Panama City Beach to break that record, and I’m not being sarcastic with the use of brave this time, because some scary ass people hang out in that town.

And now, in the least surprising global news of the year, the United States has once again fallen behind China. Last weekend, 1,085 women took part in a bikini parade in Huludao, China to absolutely decimate Florida’s record. But after reading this brief description of China’s effort at RT, I can’t help but think it’s a little unfair.

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I don’t know much about the Russian city of Vladivostok other than it is the largest Russian port on the Pacific Ocean, and I only know that because I found this cool site that has a ton of information on anything you can think of. I’m not going to tell you the name of the site, though, because it’s my little secret. But apparently my ignorance of Vladivostok and Russian culture has kept me blind to what I am now calling the most important competition of the year.

The 2012 Vladivostok Bikini Fitness Open took place just a few weeks ago, and while I am upset that I didn’t get to this in a more timely manner, the website English Russia (simple yet effective, comrades) raises the all important point that the Open “for some unknown reason has not been widely covered by media…” Well, English Russia, I am here to answer your call, much like our two countries worked together to defeat the enemy in Iron Eagle 2. RIP Doug Masters.

And I not only second this statement, but I will slam my fist on my desk in outrage as I scroll through the photos of the hard-working, dedicated women who participated in this *clears throat* fitness competition. They deserve to be known and appreciated for their *clears throat* ambition, damn it.

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Sadly, I don't know where this takes place, but rest assured I will watch this video as many times as it takes to discover the location of this beach:

You don't see many young people working on the fundamentals like these lovely women.  Great job ladies, you've rekindled my interest in women's soccer! -KD