I don’t know anything about these two women, other than that they’re clearly wearing German national unitards and doing tricks on bicycles. Maybe I should read the YouTube info…ah, it’s Carla and Henriette, the Fabulous Hochdorfer sisters. I’d Hochdorfer…them. What? Anyway, there aren’t any vert ramps or dirt ramps, but they make it work…How does an act like this get started anyway? Eh, it’s Germany. Their list of bizarre innovations is long by distinguished. Like my johnson. –Elevation Generation.
France’s anti-doping agency is at it again with Lance Armstrong, better known as The Only Reason America Pretends To Care About Cycling. Armstrong is now under fire for not respecting, uh, “the obligation to remain under the direct and permanent observation” of a doctor assigned to him on the day of a substance test. Creeeeeepy:
At question is a 20-minute delay when Armstrong says the tester agreed to let him shower while the American rider’s assistants checked the tester’s credentials. AFLD said cycling’s governing body has given its permission to open disciplinary procedures against Armstrong, but did not say what the punishment could be.
AFLD president Pierre Bordry noted that the statement does not say that Armstrong is guilty of an infraction. AFLD is expected to make a decision on whether to proceed with sanctions after its nine-member ruling committee has considered the tester’s report.
I have no idea whether or not Armstrong is dirty, but I respect the “game within the game” that PED testing has become over the past 20 years. If you don’t get caught, that’s as good as not having done it for me, since all these other clowns are out there shooting each other in the ass with who-knows what. Just because The White Barry Bonds doesn’t shave his legs and take part in their spandex circle-jerk doesn’t ruin his standing in a sport where he’s the only reason I even care. Besides, anything that annoys the French is automatically awesome.
Listen, I love celebrating other people’s pain way more than the next guy, but even this face plant makes me cringe. And keep in mind this is coming from a blogging team that posted video of someone dying yesterday.
…IN JAPAN CHINA!!!!
If there’s anything I missed that isn’t covered in the headline, feel free to let me know.
I’m in a particularly nasty mood today. Maybe it’s the rain, or the hangover, or the restraining orders, I don’t know. Whatever the case, I’m getting way more pleasure than I have any right to from this kid face-planting and squealing like a stuck pig. Yes, yes! Zoom in on his agony! Now in slo-mo! Again! Slower! Mwahahahaha!
I’m… not a good person. But to be fair, that kid did have his hat on crooked.
After the jump we've got a fun little video of a youngster who fashions himself a bit of an Evel Knievel. Why, just look at him jump those trash cans on his bike! Two trashcans! Three! Four! Fiv– ooh. Okay, better dial it back to four.
Yes, he eventually hits the glass ceiling of child daredevilry. And by glass ceiling I mean paved road. And, in an odd flirtation with feelings of humanity, I actually kinda feel sorry for the crying kid. Probably because the older kids cheering him on are even happier when he's hurt. Hey you asshole kids, you leave him alone! Laughing at crying children is MY thing!
