From time to time, sports mascots will “fight.” It’s usually in the form of the Phillie Phanatic taking big, Curly-from-The-Three-Stooges wind-ups and knocking out a Mr. Met lookalike or whoever, and it’s all in good fun. When one of the mascots shows up to the comedy fight trying to dropkick the other, it becomes a for-real living Muppet shootfight.

Yet that’s precisely what rabid prep basketball fans in Kentucky received on Tuesday night, when Louisville’s crosstown rivalry between Louisville (Kent.) Male High and Louisville (Kent.) DuPont Manual High devolved into a massive brouhaha between the two teams’ mascots. (via Prep Rally)

As you can see from the video after the jump (forgive the vertical video syndrome and the guy getting so into the fight that he just films the armpits of the people around him), the ram mascot figures out the combination to the bulldog’s throwdown vault, and the two pretty much hockey fight. You can only hurt the other guy so much when you’re haymakering a big foam head, but they’re really going at it.

Check it out:

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Sometimes I think we take guys like New Orleans Hornets center Chris Kaman for granted, as he is often mocked and criticized for being such an avid hunter. But he doesn’t care about the criticism, as evidenced by his recent posting of the above image on his Twitter account. Kaman Tweeted the picture in partial jest, as the Hornets were set to play the Charlotte Bobcats, but it also raised an interesting point – don’t we need guys like Kaman in case a wild animal ever gets loose on a basketball court?

Israel’s Maccabi Tel Aviv basketball team now knows the answer to that question is a resounding yes. Recently, during one of their games, the Fightin’… um, Tell Avivers almost had a full blown riot on their hands, when a ferocious beast interrupted game play. I’ve included the video after the jump, but please cover the eyes of any small children near you.

Also, reminder, most of you aren’t supposed to be near small children.

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It’s well-known that the majority of mascots are f-cking annoying, and the Vanderbilt Old Guy (I don’t care about f-cking Commodores, so you’re now Old Guys) fits right in with that sentiment. At a basketball game, the Old Guy decided to pump up students by smacking one of them in the face in a pretend fight. I’m assuming the Old Guy didn’t have any depth perception, because he clocked that kid and made him forget what dregs of Finite Math he hadn’t already lost due to a Keystone-and-pizza diet.

Bloody mascot carnage after the jump.
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This might be one of the best mascot videos that I’ve seen. As Brutus Buckeye leads the Ohio State football team onto the field against in-state opponent Ohio U., he gets tackled by Rufus, the mascot of the latter school. The only thing more awesome would have been Rufus driving up through the human tunnel in a Hummer as empty beer cans flew out the window.

This is not the first time that I’ve seen Rufus mix it up with the opposition. I distinctly remember a game at Eastern Michigan in the mid-1990s (I was in the witness relocation program while testifying against Michael Jackson, as I recall) where Ohio’s mascot and Eastern Michigan’s mascot tumbled down a hill near the field in a sort of wrestling match.

As for whether or not this was pre-arranged, nobody seems to know, but the awkwardness after the initial hit and the general confusion of all parties involved (including the on-field security) suggest that this was simple blood lust from the visiting furry. We need more of this in college football, especially when the games on the field don’t turn out to be as competitive.

UPDATE: The Ohio University student in the mascot costume has been banned from all future athletic events. Of course he was…but how will they know what he looks like?
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Somehow the Atlanta Hawks mascot, Spirit, found himself one step closer to freedom during the Hawks-Heat playoff game last night. Maybe mascot is the wrong word, since it tends to make one think of something like this guy, but I digress. Someday birds will be able to play in the NBA without being discriminated against, and we’ll all look back at Spirit for showing his strength in blazing the trail.

The Oregon Duck mascot won't be on the sideline today in Ann Arbor, he was suspended for this: 

While you were watching this tremendous video, I was reading the article detailing the Duck's suspension:

“At least three, but maybe more” students serve as the Duck mascot, [UO sports information director Dave] Williford said.

NO! Er, I mean that's disillusioning.  No, of course I didn't think the Duck was real . . . OK, I did.  So, if it is just a costume, why not just suspend the aspiring thespians who play the Duck?  Also, I don't see how Oregon beats the Wolverines without their mascot, unless they can play better than a Division I-AA without him. -KD 

{Larry Brown Sports}