It’s the best thing to happen to laser shows since the South Park Planetarium did ‘Laser Loggins!’

Baltimore’s Marriott Waterfront in Harbor East has initiated a Ray Lewis Light Show on the side of the building. No, really – a laser show of his pre-game dance. (via Bob’s Blitz)

The dance (which is pretty well done) went up last Friday between 6 and 9, but YouTube locals assume it’ll keep going up, as long as the Baltimore Ravens keep winning. The Ravens/Patriots game doesn’t start until 6:30 PM on Sunday, so if you’re in the area, drive down to the harbor and take a look. And hey, if Laser Lewis isn’t happening, at least you’ll get to hear some local country rock bands and pay $45 for a bucket of wings.

After the jump, I’ve included OUR exclusive video of Ravens fans seeing the light show for the first time.

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We don’t really ease back into our regular features scheduling until Monday, but Christmas is over, right? That’s it. When the 26th hits, it’s the end of the “everybody singing Jingle Bells” jazz and straight into non-stop year-end lists until January.

We didn’t get to write about EVERYTHING Christmas-related this season and a lot of stuff is just being shared around today, so I thought I’d perform a gesture of good will and put everything relevant to post-Christmas Wednesday in one handy spot for the enjoyment of all. Or the enjoyment of anybody still clinging to Christmas, I guess.

Up first: School children singing a Robert Griffin III Christmas carol.

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Mike Wilbon’s arch nemesis Dan Steinberg posted a series of pictures from the new Nike store in Washington DC yesterday, including the one that you’re looking at above. Apparently (and naturally) the store is a massive tribute to all that is DC sports culture, but none of that matters right now, because of that picture up there. What the hell is going on in that picture? That’s Ray Rice trying to tackle Brian Orakpo. WHY???

Of course, it shouldn’t surprise us that this conversation is already alive and well at Reddit, so I will let them ask and answer the big question. First, the thread’s creator and Washington Redskins fan “RamsesToo” states our frustration:

Display at the new Nike Store in D.C. Ray Rice is trying to tackle Brian Orakpo because logic.

Then, Seattle Seahawks fan “guardpost” counters:

Orakpo is running with one of Flacco’s turnovers and Ray Rice is trying to make the tackle. I feel like that’s not much of a logical stretch.

That’s a good point. HOWEVER, there’s one problem with that idea and “RamsesToo” is on top of it…

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Well, all of our complaining and cursing did it… just kidding. The NFL owners and Roger Goodell did it – they got the referees to agree to a new deal and come back to work for Thursday Night Football. It had nothing to do with ESPN announcers going nuts on Monday Night Football (something the network, of course, boldly proclaimed was the reason for the new deal) or TJ Lang’s Tweets blowing up or even the NFL offices receiving 70,000 phone calls from livid fans in the hours after the Seattle Seahawks may have been handed a win they didn’t deserve.

Nope, it was those brave owners and the hard-working commissioner who stuck it out and did what was in the best interest of their sport. They made sure that the refs didn’t get the few million dollars they were asking for from the league’s $10 billion in annual revenue. And even if the refs didn’t agree, those replacement fellas weren’t bad at all. Either way, make sure you thank your team’s owner when you see him or her. Just don’t touch him, you pathetic, lowly scum.

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Watching Detroit Lions quarterback Matt Stafford poop the bed against the St. Louis Rams yesterday was rather bothersome for me, as I spent a quarter of my auction league cash on his three-pick-throwing ass a week ago. But then I remembered the above commercial for Monday Night Football and the irony tickled me enough to make me forget that he almost cost me my suicide pick, too. Seriously, just too much stress in one afternoon.

Speaking of football and quarterbacks that cause migraines, Philip Rivers and the Chargers headline an evening that features two fierce NFL rivalries. And if you’re a communist or tree-hugger and you don’t like watching the NFL, I’ve found some alternative programming for you as well.

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"Where's Ben Wallace, String?"

HBO’s ‘The Wire’ is the best TV show ever made. There, I said it.

In 5 seasons over 60 episodes, David Simon’s law and streets epic was literature on television, an experience so dense and rewarding that it somehow managed to simultaneously depict life in Baltimore as realistic and hyper-romanticized. It’s one of those things you’ve either seen and worship, or have resisted all your friends screaming OH MY GOD YOU HAVEN’T SEEN THE WIRE NO SERIOUSLY BORROW MY DVDS AND WATCH IT for like ten years.

This week’s Sports On TV column is in reverence to this masterwork of Orioles jokes and cereal references, and my only real disclaimer is that there are tons and tons of spoilers inside, so it’ll work best if you’ve seen the entire run of the show. If you haven’t, you should still click through … out-of-context Wire quotes are like gold, glittery paint on the Internet and should be experienced.

And yes, I took notes on a criminal f**king conspiracy.

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