Seriously, I don’t know how anyone can characterize black-and-white TV as “fun.” Do you think walking to work each morning and hunting your own food would be fun? What about getting married right out of high school and dealing with a wife who thinks anal is only a style of thermometer?  Society progresses for a reason, you pricks. Unless, of course, your society is tied to the National Hockey League:

Your TV set will be working fine, when you see the second period of Friday’s Avs-Canadiens game on the House Channel. To commemorate the Canadiens’ 100th year (and to get a little free pub like this), Stan Kroenke will instruct his minions to have a black-and-white picture for the full second period.

For the third period, the Avalance plan to select one section of fans from their arena and turn them in to the Senate Un-American Activities Committee as communists.

[Denver Post, via Puck Daddy, who sports a bio pic in black-and-white. Get off his lawn.]

Rugby is so thrilling for English sports fans, this is what they watch for the pre-game:

A maturing English cheddar cheese that has attracted a devoted worldwide following on the Internet showed its patriotic colours on Friday ahead of England's World Cup quarter-final against Australia.  Dubbed Wedginald by its many admirers, the cheese appeared on screen on Friday with an England rugby ball perched on top.  Since it first appeared on the www.cheddarvision.tv Web site in late December last year the cheese — which simply matures on screen in real time — has attracted 1.6 million hits.

Great.  With the success of The Office, network executives are going to steal the ideas of any popular British shows and slap them on the pictocube.  Get ready to stare at a wheel of cheese age an for an hour every week.  Oh well, at least it will be better than K-Ville.  (Oh yeah, England beat the Wallabies.) -KD

David Lander, who played Squiggy on the '70s/'80s sitcom Laverne & Shirley, is an associate scout for the Seattle Mariners.  Lander has MS (multiple sclerosis), and scouting for the M's works well with his schedule to promote awareness for the neurological disorder.  I imagine the people who attend these talks are upset when they discover the lecture is about MS and not the M's.  Ah, the hilarity that ensues from miscommunication, just like an old sitcom.  Except the plot is implausible, just like an old sitcom – no one would willfully attend a discussion about the Mariners.  Anyway, Squiggy is a lifelong baseball fan:

An ardent baseball fan since the age of 4, he adopted the Pittsburgh Pirates as his favorite team because he liked the alliteration of the name (he still speaks wistfully of the Bucs' days in Forbes Field).

Many Pirates fans are wistful.  By the way, in Pittsburgh, 'wistful' is a colloquialism that means 'ugly and pissed-off'.  Lander uses a wheelchair now because of his condition:

In these new stadiums, they build them handicap-accessible," said Lander, who concealed his MS so he would not be excluded from acting roles because of misconceptions about MS. (He was let go from the production of Conan the Destroyer because the director thought he was drunk on the set), "but in the older places, like Yankee Stadium, it's an afterthought."

That's a good idea.  The next time my boss accuses me of being intoxicated, I'll say I have MS.  Of course, I have to find new job first.  Too bad this story wasn't around on Monday, or I'd still be making the donuts. -KD