Would you like to watch a video of a big panda wrestling around with a little one? If I told you that the big panda pulls off a sweet German suplex (pictured, right) would you want to watch it more?

I ran the YouTube description through Google Translate, and this is what it gave me:

March 11, 2013. Beach has excellent outdoor debut.
Good beaches to chase the excellent beach.

I don’t speak Chinese, but I’m gonna guess the words for “panda” and “beach” are pretty similar. Panda has excellent outdoor debut! Good pandas to chase the excellent panda. That makes more sense, right? Because that big panda is good, but the baby panda is excellent. He also need to watch out for the big panda’s sick gutwrench.

[h/t to Daily Of The Day]

Worst. Police lineup. Ever.

If you thought that something as silly as constant foot and ankle injuries leading to early retirement were going to stop former Houston Rockets center Yao Ming from dominating the world, you were dead wrong. Yao, after having spent some time adorably tickling a baby panda, has taken his place in the Chinese People’s Political Consultative Conference as a legislative advisor. He’s like the Bill Bradley of China, not because he’s a former athlete turned politician but because he makes his peers look freakishly small.

Of the 142 members of the CPPCC, Yao is the youngest at only 31-years old. Responded the 32-year old blogger writing about Yao’s monumental success, “Yeah, but can he make fart noises with his hands? I think not.”

“Yao said the new title shows trust coming from the people in the city. He had said before that once he decides to do something, he will try his best to accomplish it. So we can trust him that he can balance all aspects of his work and study, and do well in this job,” said Yao’s spokesman Zhang Chi.

But Zhang denied that Yao has any ambitions to have a “political career”.

“The responsibilities for a CPPCC member include offering political consultation, and supervision. What Yao wants is to use his influence to do good deeds for society but not to seek a political position,” Zhang said.

(Via China Daily, which needs new space bars for its computers.)

Good deeds like releasing 6 pandas into the wild and donating his personal three-penis wine to an auction benefiting the Special Olympics East Asia. I’m not saying that Yao’s young age and incredible accomplishments make him any better than most American basketball players, but if Yao and Rasheed Wallace both needed a kidney to live and I was the only match, I could probably be won over with a pet baby panda.

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Yao Ming may have retired from the NBA earlier than most of us would have liked, but that’s not going to stop him from using his Hall of Fame notoriety for good. First, he donated a few bottles of his very own wine and some custom shoes and suits to an auction that benefited the Special Olympics East Asia. Now he and his wife, Ye Li, have loaned their star power to the grand opening of the Chengdu Research Base of Giant Panda Breeding in China’s Sichuan province.

The facility just launched the Panda Valley protection area, where rescued and rehabilitated giant pandas are being safely returned to their lives in the wild so they will hopefully start doing it and making more adorable panda babies, like the pair that Yao and Ye got to play with yesterday. Seriously, I can’t think of a better way to make a man feel better about his career ending early than by letting him play with baby pandas.

Except maybe red panda babies, because they’re probably the most adorable little things on this planet.

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