All Star Bowling Trick Shots, The Most UPROXX Video Of All Time

Written by Brandon Stroud / 11.08.12

All Star Bowling Trick Shots

This video showed up on our tip line a few minutes ago, with the subject, “the most uproxx video i’ve seen”. I don’t think it’s even a contest.

‘All Star Bowling Trick Shots’ combines everything UPROXX loves: Funny Or Die videos, trick shot videos, celebrities doing weird stuff (like Craig Robinson dunking, or John Goodamn, or all intents and purposes the most bowling-related celebrity in the video, passing a bowling ball with a trampoline), Aubrey Plaza, kinda-crummy hip hop music … all it needs is for someone to turn it into an animate GIF gallery with subtitles and it’s our jobs in a nutshell. Oh, and Kate Upton should be there. And corgis.

Anyway, there’s nothing I can say about this video that isn’t trumped by watching it, so check it out below. Oh, I can say one thing: You are awesome, ‘Home Improvement’s’ Richard Karn, and you should be in everything. There. That felt good.

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Sports On TV: Parks And Recreation’s 20 Greatest Sports Moments

Written by Brandon Stroud / 08.30.12


During this year’s Summer Olympics, NBC’s best play-by-play analyst was Retta, who plays Donna on ‘Parks And Recreation’. Her tweets about chocolate tumblers and the Olympics trying to break a bitch were amazing, and as sports bloggers it’s our duty to shine the spotlight on every legitimately hilarious person who touches sports.

Not only is Retta’s show one of the best on television right now, it’s also one of the most sports friendly. That makes it a perfect fit for Sports On TV, our column dedicated to the best sports moments of shows about something other than sports. This is the first still-on-the-air show we’ve attempted to cover, so if you’re reading this a year from now and are all, “HEY, WHERE’S THE EPISODE WHERE MCKAYLA MARONEY SHOWS UP AND ANDY WINS THE LONG JUMP” or whatever, give us a break, we aren’t time travelers.

With greatest possible love to Retta, Michael Shur, Greg Daniels and the rest of the talented people making my favorite 30 minutes of any given week, here are our 20 favorite sports moments from ‘Parks And Recreation’. I don’t know what this is, but I want you to read all of it.

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I’m Writing Morning Links Where I Make Out With Aubrey Plaza

Written by Brandon Stroud / 09.02.11

Aubrey Plaza

Links

Aubrey Plaza Is a Sexy Stroke Victim - The woman who plays April Ludgate had a stroke when she was 20. Unbelievable. I’m happy she’s okay, and even happier that we didn’t end up with Ellie Kemper (or whoever) doing some terrible exaggerated April for three years. [Warming Glow]

Frotcast 63: Matt Ufford Talks TV, Murder, & Hurricanes - Like most people, I could listen to Uff talk about whatever he wanted for as long as he wanted. And hurricane or no, Whole Foods is almost always a mad house. People are always stealing kombuchas that they didn’t order. [Film Drunk]

15 Exceptionally Haunting Movie Cinemagraphs - Cinemagraphs are really cool, but far too often are just people opening and closing their eyes. Regardless, his post really made me want to go watch The Shining again. [UPROXX]

Paz de la Huerta Is Good at Lingerie - Paz’s face is incredibly ugly to me most of the time, but her body is absolutely top shelf. Also, she will not stop trying to show it to me. [Warming Glow]

FIGHTS – Legends, Douchebags, and Pig Slop! - Bowie Ibarra reviews the most recent Anarchy Championship Wrestling show, and yes, just like last time this one features a cameo from yours truly. He calls Vanity Valentine “Velvet” Valentine, but honestly “Velvet Valentine” sounds way better. [Zombie Blood Fights]

Justice League of the Americas Will Make You Wish for a Western - It won’t if you’ve watched Justice League and seen the Jonah Hex episodes! But seriously, this guy loves drawing Liefeld crotch bulges. Just speed lines all over the front of pants. [Gamma Squad]

This Is The Parody Of A Porn Parody Of The Dark Knight Rises That Gotham Deserves - I want to be in charge of the porno parodies. “Okay team, make me a list of literally everything that gets made, we’re gonna go down the list one by one.” And porn fans are out there waiting for me to parody The Help, but I’m too busy working out a cohesive porno narrative for Marmaduke. Gamma Squad]

1988 George Lucas Calls 2011 George Lucas an “Egotistical Gangster” - What can you even say at this point? I have the DVDs with the original versions as special features, if he wants to make Yoda breakdance, let him. Just make the ones that aren’t total horsesh*t available to me somewhere. [Film Drunk]

15 Things That Prove God Hates the South - Number 16: “How every girl Brandon had a crush on growing up looks in 2011″. [Buzzfeed]

There Have Only Been 5 Successful Film-to-TV Series Adaptations - A debatable point (and he seems to be neglecting how great “The Real Ghostbusters” was, it had Garfield as Peter Venkman for Christ’s sakes) but fun to talk about. Also, Young Indiana Jones sucked a dick and was not successful. [Pajiba]

The 5 Most Depraved Sex Scenes Implied in Harry Potter - Hey, somebody should make a porno parody of Harry Potter and include all of these scenes! I’d watch Potter if folks were getting bukkake’d by centaurs. [FARK]

8 Adorable College Mascot Brawls - Best link of the day. [The Smoking Jacket]

Mila Kunis or Olivia Wilde: Who Won Summer? - One of them had CGI nipples and the other keeps trying to convince me she’s Just One Of The Guyz. Which one was in a good movie over the summer? I think they both lost. [Moviefone]

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Morning Links Can Put It In My Video

Written by Brandon Stroud / 06.23.11

Change the name of the team to the “Los Angeles Puffins of Anaheim”. F**k you, I watched that show.

Sports

With Leather & Draftstreet are Giving Away Money - In case you missed yesterday’s most important post (no, not the one about the Texas Rangers wearing sunglasses), we’re having another fantasy game on Friday, and this time everybody’s playing. Jump over to The Smoking Section and take Gotty’s™ word for it, then follow his link to Free Money On The Internet. [Smoking Section]

Biggie Smalls Lives Through a Lacrosse Announcer - While you’re there, make sure to watch this video of a guy who has heard the greatest hits of the Notorious B.I.G. and wants to tell you about it. I need to start podcasting so you guys can find out how many rap lyrics I know. (spoiler: a lot) [Smoking Section]

The Dugout: Old Man and The Sea - Best and Worst of Fake Underwear Fighting takes a lot of time to produce, so I’m thinking “Wednesday, Thursday, Friday” as the weekly Dugout schedule. Sound good? Comment on this and I’ll make it happen. [The Dugout]

Keyboard Warriors #3: The Ream - After you’ve satiated my need for instant, constant feedback, check out the only officially licensed branch of people ripping off The Dugout. Read it, then read any of the site’s comments sections for continued hilarity. [Cage Potato]

Not Sports

The Ten Worst Answers for Best Show on Television - I legitimately feel sorry for someone who thinks “Chuck” is the best show on television, bless their heart. There are a lot of good shows on television, but the very best one stars April motherf**king Ludgate. If she tried to rape meh, I would not fight back. [Warming Glow]

Futurama Returns Tonight - What’s On Tonight: one of my favorite shows of all time (because my favorite part of any Simpsons episode is the physics jokes) returns with new episodes. If it’s like any other season of Futurama, it will start off shifty, then get amazing. [Comedy Central]

Keanu Reeves Cashing In On Sad Keanu Meme - The quickest way to create your own Sad Keanu meme: watch Much Ado About Nothing. I appreciate a bad Keanu Reeves performance as much as the next guy, but holy sh** dude, what were you thinking? [Uproxx]

The Best of 60s Spider-Man Meme - Fun Fact: Though I wasn’t alive to watch it when it aired, the 1960s Spider-Man cartoon is one of the funniest things in history to me. I think it has something to do with him having no web lines on his chest, and how I’ve never done drugs, but the show makes me feel like I have. [Gamma Squad]

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