The Eagles cheerleaders went someplace sunny and sandy to shoot their forthcoming calendar, and good news, everyone: it's going to be eco-friendly (follow link for slide show).

The Eagles Cheerleaders annual calendar has been widely known for its cutting-edge concepts and style [like that one year, when they... uh... wore bikinis -Ed.], and this year it’s Going Green. The 38 bio-licious women on the squad will be wearing bikinis made of 95% organic cotton and recycled plastic soda bottles as well as jewelry and accessories made from bamboo and other recycled, upcycled and repurposed products such as CDs, computer chips, glass, cable wire, candy wrappers and watch parts.

And yet, all I want the Eagles cheerleaders to do is throw the bikinis away.   That's irony you can masturbate to, friends.

[on 205th] 

and sisters.

Among the 15 rookies are two sisters from Media – Paige [left] and Danni-Lynn Bell [right] – who are joining their sister, Nikki [center], who made the squad last year.

"I think it's amazing to have three sisters who all have similar interests, all love the performing arts, and all have the qualifications to make the squad," [director Barbara] Zaun said.

You know, I've never quite understood why, as men, we would want twins or regular sisters together in a sexual situation.  I mean, the thought of incest turns my stomach.  There's no way that sisters making out could be sexy.  And yet here's my penis, wishing for exactly that.  Love is mysterious thing, my friends.

[More photos and video at the Eagles Cheerleaders' page]

Is that "4th Down" Freddie Mitchell stepping out at a Vegas nightclub? According to my sources, it certainly is. And it appears that his lovely date has undone a button for every wide receiver more talented than him that was picked after him in the 2001 NFL Draft. Yes, there's a button for Steve Smith, one for Chad Johnson, and even one for Reggie Wayne. Why was this scene important enough to photograph? It seems George Clooney's girlfriend (above) was at this soirée as well – she looks like a fun girl. Anyway, enjoy clicking through the whole gallery of party-goers while I attend to some assistant editor duties (i.e. recuperate from hangover). Careful, some of the pics aren't even safe for your day of rest.

By the way, Clooney is starring in a new pigskin film – you can read an expert review at Film Drunk. The movie is about football, so that's why I'm mentioning it. The pigskin reference? I was talking about Renee Zellweger. -KD

The Philadelphia Eagles cheerleading squad is widely recognized by overweight masturbators as one of the most attractive in the NFL, and I'm pleased to report that they held open call auditions this past weekend.  You can see a full gallery of the action here, although why you'd want to I don't know.  It's the same as every other cheerleader gallery.  Just a bunch of wallflowers with glasses and mousy brown hair wearing sweatpants and discussing the Bronte sisters.

The team is not yet finalized, however, and you can attend the finals on April 15th for a mere $20, as long as your parole officer doesn't find out.

[on 205th] 

Hey, look! Philadelphia is trying to make some exciting off-season moves:

The Eagles have talked to the Cardinals about acquiring Fitzgerald, with cornerback Lito Sheppard and receiver Reggie Brown rumored to be part of the offer. The Cardinals have little interest in either player, and they are not eager to part with Fitzgerald, who made two Pro Bowls in his first four seasons. Sheppard also has been to the Pro Bowl twice, but there are questions about his durability and he's unhappy with his contract. The Cardinals aren't eager to trade for someone else's problem.

But if the Cardinals won't trade for someone else's problem, who will? Also, Takeo Spikes will no longer be clad in midnight green on Sundays:

Spikes told WIP-AM (610) that the Eagles had tried to get the veteran linebacker to play for less money, but two team sources said that wasn't the case. Eagles officials said they simply wanted to go with the young linebackers who showed promise in the latter stages of last season.

Hmm, wants to go withsomebody younger and who's not someone else's problem? Sounds a lot like my ex-girlfriend. Anyway, if you think this post was just an excuse to display a photo of former Eagles cheerleader and sexy party girl Ali, you're absolutely correct. Enjoy! -KD

I haven't exactly been Mr. Journalist when it comes to Britt and Garrett Reid, the troubled sons of Eagles coach Andy Reid.  This is partly because I don't consider them sports figures, but mostly because they're not hot young women.  Oh man, if they were a couple of drugged-up hotties in their early twenties… But I digress.  After a variety of offenses, Garrett and Britt have both been sentenced to jail, and the judge didn't think the Reid house was the best place for the sons to be living.

"It sounds more or less like a drug emporium there with the drugs all over the house, and you're an addict," [Judge] O'Neill told Britt Reid.

Police found a shotgun and hollow-point bullets along with cocaine, marijuana and OxyContin in the vehicle Britt Reid was driving during a Jan. 30 road-rage encounter, and later found a handgun at the house that they believe he had brandished at the other driver. They found vials of heroin and steroids, more than 200 pills and a drug scale in Garrett Reid's car the same day, when he injured another motorist.

Drugs, guns, and driving problems.  Good Lord, check these kids' DNA.  It's like T.I mated with Anna Nicole Smith and Rebecca Gayheart.  Oh but wait, there's more:

Garrett Reid was sentenced to two to 23 months, and authorities said that he had smuggled 89 pills into jail by secreting them in his rectum.

Holy hell that's a lot of pills to jam in one rectum.  He's outfitted like the trunk of a VW Bug back there.