Here’s a fun little factoid for you crazy sports fans out there: athletes tend to buy really expensive houses. Who would have thunk it, right? Well it turns out that in a lot of cases, when athletes retire or change teams, they sell those houses and then people have an opportunity to take a look inside and see how the 1% really lives. And I’m almost always disappointed by the lack of bearsharktopus cages. Step your game up, so-called ballers.

Yesterday, the Cookie Kwans at Realtor.com posted some of the latest listings of current and former Major League Baseball players, and while there wasn’t anything too crazy, it was still pretty interesting. For instance, I can’t quite wrap my brain around how a guy could invest a quarter of his 5-year, $80 million salary into a home purchase, but then again nobody has yet to accept my challenge of giving me $80 million just to see how fast I can blow it. Offer still stands, billionaires. Let’s get this done.

Search for your dream home after the jump, you silly cash cows.

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Right now, there’s a severe lack of MLB news. The hot stove of free agency has cooled off by now, and there are only a handful of valuable free agents left; however, that doesn’t mean we should just forget about them. I present to you… the Warm Stove.

Adrian Beltre: Even though he had his second-best season in his career in 2010 with 28 HR, 102 RBI and an OBP of .365, the main reason why Beltre hasn’t been signed yet is due to his age. Teams just don’t know if Beltre could have that productivity constantly at 31. He will find a team shortly, but I doubt he’ll come close to his numbers last season. That stint still did what it was supposed to do: up his value and make his case for a multi-year contract, which he will land.
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It’s bizarre how “Achilles‘ heel” came to be part of the medical lexicon, with the name of the large tendon running down the back of the leg to the heel now named for the legend of the Ancient Greek. But the term is also shorthand for describing a glaring weakness of an otherwise impenetrable force, which is odd. Because I totally would have called that “Achilles’ balls.” Let’s ask Mariners shortstop Adrian Beltre, who suffered a fate much more cruel than that of our Greek hero.

Beltre suffered the injury in the ninth inning when a ground ball off the bat of Chicago White Sox shortstop Alexei Ramirez hit Beltre in the groin. Beltre does not wear a protective cup. He finished the 14-inning game.

Manager Don Wakamatsu said Beltre might need surgery because of bleeding in the testicle. If surgery is required, it could take months for Beltre to recover. via.

I can remember being ten years old in soccer practice and taking a ball to the nuts; it’s so painful that you wish you would die instead of endure the pain. So I applaud any dude that can take a ball of the junk and finish an extra inning game. That kind of effort takes real…balls.