Everyone has been making a big fuss over the past several days about the fact that you could dig 12 quarters out of your couch cushions and buy an ACC championship game ticket with that coin. Yes, if you go on StubHub right now, you can buy tickets to tomorrow night’s ACC title game between FSU and Georgia Tech for $3. And that’s awesome if you’re a fan of FSU. If you’re a Georgia Tech fan, I guess that’s okay, too, even though the Yellow Jackets are probably going to get their butts kicked. But it’s FSU and it’s an important game, so the Seminoles will probably find a way to disappoint their fans yet again.

But the real fun starts tonight, college football fans, and a lot of people are predicting that we’re going to see the most exciting conference championship game of the year tonight. Are they talking about the MAC Championship or the PAC-12? You’ll have to click to find out! But seriously, it’s the MAC game.

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Last week, I introduced my new favorite feature, Faces of Misery, to the delight of the trillions of people who read this website (seriously, we’re HUGE in Botswana). The problem, though, is that when I first wrote it, I couldn’t help but think, “God, my abs are shredded, and isn’t that name a little unoriginal?” and yes, it was. So I’m currently shopping around for a new name for it and will be trying them out over the next few weeks. Today’s title comes courtesy of Vince, who told me that this is the best thing he has ever thought of ever. So until I think of anything better, we’ll go with Fresh Batch of Frownies, because I like food, or maybe “Pictures of Sad People”.

I also like when people get really upset when they lose, and we witnessed plenty of that this week. Unfortunately, the game that I and my screen-grabbing cohort, Mr. Paradigm Shift of the Throw the Flag blog, was the Clemson Tigers at Florida State, and for some unknown reason, ABC’s camera guys don’t share my joy of showing miserable fans.

After Clemson carried a lead for the majority of the game, FSU suddenly pulled the “LOL JK” card in the second half and scored 35 points to defeat the Tigers 49-37, and I’m attributing FSU’s success this season to my new friendship with Burt Reynolds. One person who didn’t like that very much was Clemson’s coach Dabo Sweeney, who has my favorite coach name this side of Houston Nutt. Outside of Clemson’s misery, though, we also ran across some depressed fans in Arkansas, Arizona and Iowa. Poor, poor Iowa fans.

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The University of North Carolina is hosting a press conference this morning at which chancellor Holden Thorp and athletic director Dick Baddour will officially announce that Butch Davis is no longer the coach of the Tar Heels football program. This is the part where people are supposed to gasp loudly and drop their monocles on the ground, because Davis ran such a clean and respectable program in his four years at UNC.

So what then, aside from those silly NCAA punishments and investigations, caused these men to make such a hasty and shocking decision?

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Being a site devoted not only to the majestic clash of titans in sport, but also to sweet, sweet poon, I thought I'd respond to the demands of several readers with a follow-up to my focus on SEC Poon.

That's right: the SEC does not have a stranglehold on all late-teen/early-twenty hot chicks with a proclivity for getting drunk and sexual experimentation.  Out to prove it are the rival ACC Poon and Booties 4 Booty.  The latter, while not exclusively devoted to women of the Pac-10, does have women's asses decorated in support of Trojan QB John David Booty's quest for the Heisman.  So, you know, I gave it the benefit of the doubt.  By which I mean: I'm a weak, weak man when it comes to a spectacular ass.

Or, as I prefer to call it, a man of the people.  For the people.  As long as the people want ass.

(Thanks to The Big Lead and EDSBS) 

The supposed two best conferences in college basketball have only advanced one team each into the Sweet Sixteen.  The Big Ten has a 6-5 record in the tournament thus far, and only has Ohio State left to represent it and the Buckeyes should have lost to Xavier.  Because I hail from Chi-town, I must constantly apologize for the Big Ten's low point totals, stilted offenses and poor field goal percentages by asserting their teams play the best defense in the country.  Nope, they're just God awful.

North Carolina is the lone ACC representative still playing, and the so-called best league went 6-6 through the first two rounds of the tourney.  Too bad Billy Packer will have no team left to champion.  However, I can guarantee this extremely overvalued conglomeration of shit will have at least seven teams in next year's dance.  Whoever believes that Eastern bias doesn't exist is an idiot or works for ESPN.

A scan of the updated brackets reveal the SEC advanced three teams, the PAC-10 three, the Big 12 two, and the Big East two.  No double digit seeds progressed to the Regional Semifinals for the first time since 1995, and typing will be very painful next week as the fingers on my left hand will be 'readjusted' because your hopeful Assistant Editor wagered heavily on underdogs.

Enjoy lovely Jennifer, the last redhead of the weekend , and look for further NCAA analysis from the Chief tomorrow. -KD