The story of a lead actor living in a world of bit players, from the YouTube description:

I shot some rioting go down on Muni on McAllister and Larkin (San Francisco, Ca) after the San Francisco Giants won the 2012 MLB World Series. I started filming toward the end, about ten minutes before the cops showed up. There were a few buses stalled there because the streets were overflowing with people. When rioting began on Muni, this particular gentleman on the back of the bus was having none of it. He sat there stonefaced amidst all the chaos, presumably texting to his friends about his miserable experience commuting on Muni yet again. Everyone outside noticed his lack of celebratory and destructive spirit, so they started taking pictures and video of him until the lights went out.

This guy.

Maybe I’m not the type to turn into the apes from 2001: A Space Odyssey and start smashing boar skulls with a bone because my favorite sports team won a game, but I’m on The Dude Who Wouldn’t Riot’s side. He’s the one guy on screen with a head on his shoulders. I am pretty interested to know what he’s doing with his time (I don’t buy the “texting his friends about his miserable experience” line), so I consulted the comments section and compiled my ten favorite theories. Those are below.

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Yesterday, we shared an appearance from Los Angeles Clippers alley-oopist Blake Griffin on Conan, wherein he made a bunch of weird faces and created Conan O’Brien to be his teammate in NBA 2K13. In a better world I’d be sharing Conan clips every day, and Metta World Peace would accept his fate and become the Masturbating Bear.

Anyway, today’s Conan clips feature World Series champion and insectoid athlete overlord Hunter Pence discussing what happens when your bat shatters and hits a ball three times and/or the value of using a Katy Perry song as your walk-up music. He also reveals that when he doesn’t know what’s happening and people tell him to run, he does so by flapping his arms around and yelling “woooo”. HE IS ALSO A BUNCH OF INSECTS IN A MAN SUIT.

Both clips are after the jump.

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Today’s headline brought to you by this lady. In all seriousness, congratulations to the San Francisco Giants and all the Giants fans I know. Let’s hope next year’s World Series contains at least one team with a racist name from a city where nothing ever happens.

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Links

The Best Fan-Made Halloween Costumes From 12 Of TV’s Finest Shows |Warming Glow|

A Collection Of The Worst Band Shirts You’ll Ever Have The Misfortune Of Seeing |UPROXX|

Arnold Schwarzenegger Looks Badass In ‘Ten’ |Film Drunk|

The Air Sex Championships Returned To Austin And Oh God, They Let Me Judge Again |With Leather|

Hold Me I’m Scared: The Best 80s Horror Movie VHS Covers |Gamma Squad|

…And Then They Asked Alicia Keys To Pick Jay-Z Or Nas. |Smoking Section|

THE BEN WEAR STRIPES. THE BEN THROW TO STRIPE MAN |Kissing Suzy Kolber|

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I’m glad I went to a Giants game in San Francisco in August and only dropped 40 bucks instead of trying to pay for World Series parking. Leave your full-sized SUV at home and take the bus, jerks. (pic via Big League Stew)

- Follow us on Twitter @withleather
- Follow me personally @MrBrandonStroud and Burnsy @MayorBurnsy
- Like us on Facebook.

Links

The 7 Bands That Won CMJ Music Marathon 2012 |UPROXX|

A Very Important ‘Zooey Deschanel Boob Fight’ GIF |Warming Glow|

Denny’s is offering Hobbit breakfasts now |Film Drunk|

It’s The Best Of The 2012 Tompkins Square Halloween Dog Parade Contest |With Leather|

Olly Moss Projects Some Pop Cultural Silhouettes |Gamma Squad|

Why You Should Be Watching The CW’s New Series “Arrow” |Smoking Section|

Peyton Manning Is Denver’s Dark Lord |Kissing Suzy Kolber|

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