I don’t know why I forgot to write about it a few weeks ago, but I didn’t hate the Ryan Lochte cameo on 30 Rock. In fact, I laughed rather amply at it, because Tina Fey, that glorious goddess of comedy writing, created a character that was perfect for the guy who spent his birthday hanging out with The Situation – “Sex Idiot”. In case you missed the episode, Lochte played one of Sbarro heiress Pizzarina Sbarro’s boyfriends, as she explained to Jack Donaghy that different guys provide different aspects of relationships for her.

Basically, Lochte played a dipshit who likes having sex. And that just seemed perfect. In fact, if he wants to play that same character in anything he appears in – 90210, The Bachelor, the 2016 Summer Olympics – I’m all for it. But I really hope that people actually liking his performance on 30 Rock doesn’t encourage him to think that he is hilarious. Just kidding, too late.

Nissan has created a new web series called “Date Better with Sentra” with a man identified only as “suave narrator”, and in a new commercial, he’s joined by Lochte, who is as packed with personality as ever.

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One of the unfortunate drawbacks of this being an almost entirely sports-related blog (unless, in extreme circumstances, the situation calls for Kate Upton pictures) is that we don’t ever really get to enjoy the best part of Halloween – girls in slutty costumes. Fortunately, the US Women’s National Soccer Team is here to help us out with that, and soccer girls totally know how to party. Not as much as rugby girls, but they’re still up there.

That said, With Leather’s Official Favorite Women’s Soccer Player Alex Morgan and the equally awesome Sydney Leroux paid tribute to their fellow American Olympians, McKayla Maroney and Gabby Douglas, respectively, over the weekend at whatever Halloween parties they attended with their teammates Abby Wambach and Shannon Boxx.

Basically, this is a very roundabout way of me saying that Morgan and Leroux Tweeted pictures of themselves in one-piece bathing suits, so I’m posting them. Consider this the candy that I would have pretended to put in your bag if you came to my door. (Along with a couple ice cubes, because I’m a dick.)

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Aside from Michael Phelps and Ryan Lochte, most of us would be hard pressed to name another Olympic swimmer, especially those from other countries, because USA! and all that patriotic jazz. But over in South Africa, gold medal swimmer Chad le Clos is the bee’s knees to all the kids, because he took home top the gold in the 200m butterfly, as well as a silver in the 100m butterfly. Whether or not he’s wearing sleeveless leather vests and hanging out with Jersey Shore cast members is still a mystery to me.

Chad had some people concerned, though, when he arrived late to Dubai this week for the 2012 Fina/Arena Swimming World Cup. What the hell, bro? Why were you late to this huge event? It’s cool, he was just making a young girl’s dream come true by attending her high school dance.

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Conan O’Brien’s ‘Clueless Gamer’ segments are the best. If you frequent UPROXX, you may have already seen him play through ‘Skyrim’ as a cat named Mr. Buttons or not give a shit about ‘Minecraft’.

This week’s segment reviews ‘Just Dance 4,’ enlisting the help of U.S. Olympic soccer gold medalist/the Internet’s girlfriend Alex Morgan. Alex and Conan dance their way through Carly Rae Jepsen’s ‘Call Me Maybe’ and Europe’s ‘The Final Countdown’ before Conan gives up completely and leaves Alex to roll around on the floor by herself.

It’s five minutes of Alex Morgan dancing in workout clothes, people, you don’t need me to blurb this for you. Video is below.

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Olympic gold medalist and guy who trademarked the word “JEAH”, Ryan Lochte turned 28-years old on August 3, which was almost 8 weeks ago, and that’s important to remember because he was the guest of honor at Liv in Miami this past weekend, as he celebrated his birthday. At some point Locthe morphed into a sorority girl turning 21, because even if the excuse is that he didn’t have a real birthday because he was in London, that’s BS, because by all accounts the 2012 Summer Olympics was one giant orgy.

The aspiring actor even got behind the turntables (read: a bro’s Air Mac) to play DJ at his own party, but the big news is that he made a new best bro in Michael “The Situation” Sorrentino. Is anyone on this planet even surprised at this point?

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Out of habit, after I watched the season premiere of Saturday Night Live this past weekend, I called it awful, because it followed the same old formula of opening strong and slowly trailing off into laziness. But the episode had its moments, and for once I wasn’t shaking my fist at Seth MacFarlane and screaming bloody murder for FOX. Well, except for one bit in Weekend Update.

Striking while the iron is still dull, I mean hot, the SNL team had MacFarlane imitate Olympic gold medalist Ryan Lochte, and it was okay. He played too heavy on the dullard part, but people mostly liked it. So of course the gossip webloids couldn’t wait to get a response from the aspiring actor and guy who wants to make out with a dozen desperate girls for ABC.

“Well I gotta admit that was a pretty harsh one, but it’s cool to have Seth parody me,” the swimming champ told Celebuzz. “I think he pegged me wrong, but when I heard he did a skit I knew I was in for it!”

But Lochte has no harsh feelings for MacFarlane. “It’s all in fun and of course if I’m talked about on SNL I know they are gonna get me ‘Go-od,’” he said, referencing faux Lochte’s mispronunciation of NBC show Go On as “goon.” (Via Celebuzz)

HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA, I see what you did there, you comedian. This guy’s got A-list written all over him. Lochte also told Extra that SNL was making fun of the old Ryan Lochte and that he’s totes better in front of the cameras now. That’s an interesting perspective. Let’s examine Lochte’s theory, shall we?

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