With the Netherlands defeating Uruguay 3-2 yesterday and Spain facing Germany in the other semifinal later today, the 2010 FIFA World Cup is nearly at a close; the only other games to be played are the championship on Sunday and the third place game who cares.

It’s been a delightful World Cup; this is the first one I’ve fully enjoyed with the full power of the Internet behind it (in 2006 there was Deadspin and little else). The vuvuzela meme was so much fun that I grew to enjoy hearing the infernal buzz when I turned the TV on in the morning. And though the officiating was frequently terrible, the commentators were not: ESPN deserves credit for hiring excellent, intelligent broadcasters who elevated the games with their calls — most notably Ian Darke (below: watch/listen to Darke’s call of Giovanni von Bronckhorst’s rocket of a goal yesterday).

Finally, while it’s sad that the USA missed a golden chance to make the semifinals — assuming future advancements to the knockout stage, their quarter of the bracket won’t be filled with second-tier teams the likes of Ghana and Uruguay — it’s also nice to enjoy the games without screaming in angst or feeling ill at a defensive lapse that leads to a goal in the fifth minute. No, I’m happy to enjoy what little world-class soccer is left without seeing Wesley Sneijder and the Dutch destroy my favorite team. Maybe in 2014.

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Look, I’ve actually enjoyed the World Cup this year. Even the scoreless games have featured a lot of drama and excitement, and I feel really bad for that Japanese bastard who missed that penalty kid kick at the end of his team’s game against Paraguay. Is it my idea concept for sport? Hardly, but I can appreciate this tournament for what it is: a collection of great worldwide talent that, three years out of four, most of us don’t really care about.

But you can’t say that to people that actually like soccer. They get all huffy with their It’s the WORLD’s game and It’s REAL football and Soccer’s only gay when the Portuguese do it. Yeah, we get it. You like soccer. A lot. Nobody’s going to listen to your whining and think, “Wow, those are all wonderfully thought-out points. I guess I should like soccer now.”

And that’s why I loved this tweet from Brett Erlich, who hosts a couple things called The Rotten Tomatoes Show and Grand Professor of Viral Video Film School. He tweets, “Twilight’s like soccer. They run around for 2 hours, nobody scores, and its billion fans insist you just don’t understand.” That’s a burn, soccer fans. At least, it is until one of those dinky linesman puts up a flag to call offside.

Via ROFLrazzi. Thanks, Ann.

We get a lot of reader tips and links, and even if I personally don’t tell you so, I’m grateful for everyone that takes the time to write in and share their findings with us. I was especially grateful for this submission from sexy reader Cory, who sent us a breakdown of Nike’s epic “Write The Future” ad, and the dissection is just as impressive as the shoe company’s original three-minute ode to the World Cup.

(0:00) – Didier Drogba – Ivory Coast – Broke his arm before the tournament, still scored a goal. Team out of the World Cup.

(0:31) – Fabio Cannavaro – Italy – Italy only managed draws against Paraguay and New Zealand (they’re [sic] greatest soccer result ever) and gave up 3 goals and lost to Slovakia (they’re first WC as an independent nation and greatest win ever). Team out of the World Cup.

(0:45) – Wayne Rooney – England – Didn’t score a goal in the WC and was really a non-factor in England’s huge disappointment. England only scored 2 goals in the group stage. Team out of the World Cup.

More analysis, the full video and more after the jump. Read the rest of this entry »

Best shirts ever? Best shirts ever.

2:00 Eastern time. World Cup. USA-Ghana. DON’T F*CKING TREAD.

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Earlier this week, we called Landon Donovan’s game winner in Algeria the greatest goal in the history of American soccer. There are some good arguments against that claim: Brandi Chastain‘s converted penalty kick in 1999 was the signature moment for that Women’s World Cup. There was the lone goal in America’s 1-0 win against England in 1950 by…uh…that one guy (who was Haitian, by the way). There’s ample room for debate.

The best argument I can give is this: the United States was at the foot of a mountain in this World Cup. Team USA, with its ouster of former coach Bruce Arena and the promising play of Jozy Altidore and Clint Dempsey, went into South Africa with an unusual situation — facing the burden of expectations. With a promising team and a favorable group draw, the Yankee Mutant Ninja Turtles were expected to advance to the knockout stage and be one of 16 teams to compete for a spot in the World Cup final. After a disappointing result with Slovenia, the US needed a win over Algeria to get out of their group.

And then this happened…
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Landon Donovan authored the American sports moment of the year just hours ago when he scored the game-winning goal in stoppage time against Algeria, leapfrogging the U.S. team from World Cup elimination to first place in Group C two minutes before the referee blew the final whistle in the last of their group play matches.

Some fans may dismiss that assertion given their proclivities for the Olympics or American sports leagues, but the international impact of Donovan’s follow-up is undeniable: with their backs against the wall, the U.S. team was facing four years of platitudes, of “tough lucks” and “too bad about the refs.” But with the victory and England’s 1-0 victory over Slovenia (useless bastards), the USA will face the second-place team from Group D this weekend, an opportunity to reach the quarterfinals of the World Cup for only the second time (the first was in 2002 following a victory over Mexico).

As for Donovan, it’s long past the time when American fans can dismiss him as “Landycakes,” the talented player who wilted on the international stage. Not only did Donovan set up the Jozy Altidore shot that led to his goal, he also sparked the U.S.’s comeback against Slovenia, finally plied his trade in the English Premiere League this year, and effectively led the U.S. attack in heroic performances in this World Cup and the Confederations Cup last year. Carlos Bocanegra may wear the captain’s arm band, but Landon Donovan has proven himself worthy of it.

Now then. Time to get this celebration started.

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