Best: OMG AJ STYLES
We didn’t get to talk about this last week, but I’m pretty sure my howling, delighted laughter was heard ‘round the world. It all starts out fine, and AJ’s wife makes some good points, and really sells the effects of the Claire Lynch storyline. And then, at minute 1:30, AJ Styles stumbles into his house and…well, you can see for yourself. It’s much more effective than me typing HAHAHAHAHAHA for seven pages. Because HAHAHAHAHAHA!
This week, the camera crew tracks down AJ Styles and he is SO MAD, Y’ALL. Then again, I would be angry too if the company I had devoted years to produced a t-shirt that spelled my name in ejaculate. The shirt is called “discharge.” You are fooling no one, TNA Shop. That’s cum and you know it. And it makes AJ so mad.
Best: Hey, we found Trent Barreta!
This explains so much.
Best: AHAHAHAAHAHAH
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Worst: Thanks for showing up EY, but we’re not going to need you
Eric Young reminds of us that serious EY is seriously good. He and ODB get to have an adorable little moment before the corpse of Sting wanders up to them, so my heart is happy, but then he immediately starts making his case to be the one to go out and face Aces & Eights in the third and final match to determine who will have an extra man and the advantage going into Lethal Lockdown. He makes some deft arguments, and cuts the best promo of the entire show. He makes you want to follow him into the war Magnus was muttering on about earlier. Sting responds with a wanking motion and sends The Superkick of the Cowboy James Storm out instead. Well, not a literal wanking motion, but he may as well have. I know you’re half dead Sting, but come on, that didn’t stir a single thing in your joker-painted heart? None of your feelings descended from the rafters and made you consider EY for a second? Not a single Stinger tear splashed down? Unbelievable.
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last week not having a B&W of IMPACT made me very sad … so, I’m very excited for this one and I hope it’s so good that it’ll make up for it !
sorry, didn’t read the first page before commenting … glad you’re okay ! sorry again … now I’m gonna read the rest of the pages !
I don’t know what you’re talking about concerning Wes Briscoe. I think it’s really sweet that TNA lets a mentally retarded person cut promos and styles his hair as if he is scheduled to be in a Whitesnake video.
Anybody else think that Wes Brisco looks like Lindsay McDonald from Angel?
Also, can we get a Worst for Sting wearing an over-sized t-shirt of himself backstage? With his face paint and hideous $5 dollar K-Mart wrestling shirt, he somehow looks like more of a juggalo than Jeff Hardy.
You’re better than that Stinger. Go sign with WWE and wrestle Taker at Wrestlemania 30 to end your career.
is it you’re first time watching IMPACT ?!
Yes.
even gunner and crimson are growing fine beards like morgan .. mike knox should just leave A&8′s and all four guys should form a stable that I don’t have a good name for it and would like YOU guys to help me in that !
They form a stable known as the Bearded Gentleman’s Club and then feud with the Beard Hunter, who stalks the backstage area beating up those with facial hair because of his genetic inability to grow a beard of his own.
“I THOUGHT I SAID NO” made me crack up pretty hard.
I hate joseph park(s) and I wish he becomes abyss again as soon as possible ! (OPPOSITE DAAAAAY)
they’re even selling the aces & 8′s gear now !
jeff jarret has rumored that there might be a 2ed season of ring ka king ! what would think about that, danielle ? and who would you choose to go for some few weeks to shoot the season ?
if a picture is truly worth a thousand words than in that screen cap of Briscoe 999 of them are the word derp.
the choosing of tapa (or whatever the name was) and sting just ignoring EY were the most 2 parts I hated from the show .. wes brisco was actully fine by me ! I know, I’m crazy sometimes !
Sting looks like he’s entering BEEF MODE at the end of page 2.
Loved that Sinister Minister joke about Al Snow’s jacket. Made my day.
That pic of Wes Brisco looks like someone put a leather vest on a cocker spaniel and shaved it’s face.
actully, they decided that only 3 of the matches at lockdown are going to be inside of a steel cage ! and even though that’s TNA throwing another original concept of their history, I actully like the decision and understand the reasons behind it !!
in other news, we got kenny “with the most awesome hair cut ever” king vs zema “goku” ion vs christian “ninja turtle” york for the X-division title on the ppv too ! and also JOSEPH PARK VS JOEY RYAN !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
danielle, what would you have done if you knew joseph park and he proposed to you at the same time as your boyfriend ?!
Half way though, and it’s excellent as always Diamante. The worst when they introduced Danny Davis is well deserved (although I did sort of chuckle when Taz thought he was crooked referee Danny Davis). Why try and get your own roster over when you can continue to suckle on the teet of Vince McMahon and just confirm to your viewing audience that you’re second class all the way.
As much as I can see where you guys are coming from, mentioning that he trained the biggest star in the business doesn’t seems like something they should probably mention if they’re trying to get over his credentials (I mean, if it’s that important to justify his having a spot on the panel). They should also find a way to make TNA not seem second rate, yes, but that could apply to the whole show.
I would have been fine if they had just said, hey Here’s Danny Davis he runs OVW where most of the gut check guys end up anyway. He’s trained John Cena, Gail Kim and oh lets say Austin Aries* and treated the situation like adults instead of snickering kids trying to get away with mentioning the competition without actually saying their name.
*I have no idea who Davis has actually trained but the OVW allumni page is super impressive and pretty much has everyone that’s wrestled in the last 15 years on it.
Re: AJ Styles’ discharge shirt.
ewww, ewww, eww, ewww, Ewwwwwwwwwwwww!
When unmasked, did D’Lo yell “YOU’RE LOOKIN’ AT THE REAL DEAL NOW!”?
+1
he didn’t even bobble his head… it was terrible
I know! I was like “Get on the second turnbuckle, damnit!”
Don’t you get it? Gerald and Jack Brisco were STATION, in wrestling form!
Argh, Bellator burn :(
We are still cool friends, though Diamante Danielle, mostly because you are super awesome and so is this column!
Bellator was the fucking truth last night. #FrodoLives
It was, but I can understand the non-MMA fans getting really dang tired of Taz “WELP, BELLATOR IS COMIN UP NEXT”-ing all the time.
Oh, can TNA not afford running water? You’d think Sting would want to wash the blood off at some point instead of just clumping around backstage. S’ting la vie, I guess.
sting’s been wearing face paint for so long he hates the feeling of clean skin.
For a minute, I thought “Hmmm…That’s kinda odd to have a Sting shirt with his head covered in blood. I kinda like it.” Then I realized he was bleeding on his shirt. I still kinda want one.
Can we use the name “Velvet Chavandez” instead? It makes me think of a Alamo basement swap meet painting covered in tacky highlights.
A better pep talk Sting could have given:
“All right, you ragtag bunch of misfits! You hate me, and I hate you even more. But without my beloved Horsemen, you’re all I’ve got. So I want you to remember some inspiring words that someone else might have told you over the course of your careers, and go out there and win!”
I do love that even dead Sting’s shirt had a “crimson mask” the whole night
-Wes Brisco looks like an S&M version of those troll dolls girls used to stick on their pencil erasers
- Any D-Lo is good D-Lo
- I love you, Ivellise. I hope you continue to improve and become one of the greats. Might be awhile, but she’s got plenty of upside.
As only a sporadic watcher of TNA, I didn’t realize that D’lo was still kayfabe anonymous.
The Aces and Eights saga is just killing TNA right now. It’s reaching Wheel of Time levels of “just end it already”-ness. But there’s no end in sight, since Sting is contractually obligated to get stabbed in the back by someone at Lockdown, (It’s not a ppv unless someone betrays Sting) and we’re still due for the shocking turn of Bully and/or Brooke AND the reveal of the Higher Power. (Those last two could be the same, I suppose)
When your glacial pacing and obvious twists make this year’s Road to Wrestlemania seem like The Usual Suspects by comparison, you’re doing it wrong, made even worse by the relatively high quality of the Bully and Brooke storyline before the wedding.
Worst of all, the only conceivable endgame for this fiasco is a match involving the 2013 versions of Sting and Hogan, plus the possibility of Jeff Jarrett taking part as well.
It’s gotta be Bischoff. I’m addicted to his terrible Devil’s Ride. It’s so corny, I watch it to laugh at fake biker gangs.
So are they trying to say AJ’s talking to Aces & Eights? Because that’s one of the few ways I would find his new storyline interesting.
Congrats on the new podcast. I just got around to listening to it and it was good.
You are a brave soul for watching TNA. Kurt Angle just walking into the Aces and Eights HQ by himself has got to be one of the dumbest things I’ve seen in awhile. And that’s including the Zack Ryder/Kane storyline.
Knowing that Vince on occasion will grab one of their guys out of reflex memory (Christian) TNA may be employing the strategy of not knowing who the leader of Ace’s and 8′s is until the day of the reveal, to prevent scalping.